Destroyed Specimen

Probably dead by now.

Public Key

npub1nd04kwf686rj6t0hjphdw4m54nemjpu9enelvveykddw7hrcypaql9rj2j

NIP-05 Address

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsfkh6m8yaraped9hmeqmkh2a62euaeq7zueulkxvjtxkh0t3uzq7spzfmhxue69uhhxctvw35hv6mp9ehhyecpz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduwxyg4q

Publishing to

saltivka.org

relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub1nd04kwf686rj6t0hjphdw4m54nemjpu9enelvveykddw7hrcypaql9rj2j

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Last Notes

2026-03-26 18:53:30 UTC

How could one "live in society" while fully being themselves without compromising any personal values? Values of which hold so much importance to one's own authenticity, but are simultaneously their main source of social ostracization for them?
Then I hear the "wellbeing gurus" saying "Care about yourself", "Love yourself" or whatever wishful-thinking directly or indirectly followed by the word "yourself". Self-care only works if you disregard the fact that _Homo sapiens_ condemned themselves into a system where they can't "pay themselves" to "sell themselves food". Living beings have been eating and surviving since the... I dunno, Cambrian, Paleozoic? There was no capitalism, no communism, no "-ism" to rule the species. The scarcity, while a fundamental law of physics (First law of thermodynamics, Lavoisier "principle of mass conservation") since the dawn of Big Bang, is a human creation.
And just like a self-perpetual machine can't exist, I can neither hire myself, nor I can sell to myself because I can't pay myself and I can't give land to myself. I rely on other human beings, who require me to be assimilated by one of the socially-sanctioned life values. And I won't. I can't. I must be myself, otherwise it's so pointless to live. The closest thing would be to be assimilated by a part of society whose life values are the most matching to those I hold to myself. And I guess it's what _Homo sapiens_ have been trying since they climbed down the burning tree, yes? But, then, the irony: in order to have social capital, one must have social capital. I have none.
And to make things worse, today I'm trying to boycott the Fediverse again. I got reasons. It's not fair how I've been trying to connect, spending hours of my time to artistically create something, only for it to be met with silence, hollowness or aggression, from a part of the Web where I was promised to find "humans". It's been two years (and counting) since I developed a creative outlet, craving for I don't know what exactly, maybe craving for like-mindedness, to no avail. I don't want sycophants, clones or mirrors. I don't want bullies. I don't want apprentices. I don't want followers (neither literal nor metaphorical). I guess I don't even want "friends" in its common definition. I don't want enemies either (I don't need, I'm my own enemy). But, then, seems like either I'm asking too much, or I'm not asking anything at all.
Nostr is far from an alternative. I doubt this note will receive replies, my "WoT" (aka "social credit") is low because I neither care about my social capital nor I have any to build some should I care about it.
I'm out of moves. I mean, I _do_ have moves: I can toss away my authenticity and become assimilated by whatever "ideological pack" were to accept me the most. I can humiliate myself, begging for humans to be one of them, accepting whatever conditions they impose unto me. I won't be doing these, I don't want to. I'm no better than anyone, and similarly no one is better than me. So I'm out of moves. I don't know what to do. I do know, though, what I _won't_ do: I won't fucking sell my personal values, I'd better die if I were obligated to in order to survive. After all, would anyone sell their own personal values to try and "satisfy" me? Hell no, so why should I?

2026-03-23 19:59:19 UTC

- reply

No, why's the question?
I don't use Bluesky (at least not anymore; I used to use a long time ago, until I decided leaving it to dedicate myself to Fediverse and, recently, Nostr; but when I was on Bluesky, I wasn't really active there). It's just that part of my syncretic belief system involves Luciferianism (particularly centered on Lucifer's feminine counterpart, Mother Lilith; I used to be strictly Luciferian before She manifested in my life and became the center of my worshiping), Gnosticism (where there's the concept of the disgraceful Demiurge a.k.a. "God" alongside his Archons, and his counterpart to be sought, Sophia a.k.a. Great Mother Goddess), Tantric/Shaktism/esoteric Hinduism (Kali, specifically Her fierce, Samhara aspect, as well as Her dance as Mahakali on Shiva), among other belief systems (from ancient Sumerian comprising Ereshkigal and Lilitu, all the way to modern Thelema comprising Babalon and Nuit), intertwined with scientific concepts and certain lines of philosophy (nihilism from Phillip Mainland and Nietzsche, absurdism from Albert Camus, cognitive skepticism from René Descartes, among other philosophers). It's so deeply ingrained in my inner world my expression frequently end up echoing such references.

2026-03-23 16:45:20 UTC

- reply

Well, this Demiurgic existence seems very unlikely to get any better before all reaches of baryonic existence get to remember and recognize the plurinominal Great Cosmic Queen Mother Goddess, re-crowning Her as the Great Queen She is, bringing about the rubedo upon Yaodabaoth and his legions of archons once and for all, but... thanks!

2026-03-17 19:20:33 UTC

- reply

I loved the owl photo as the background of the terminal! 🦉

2026-03-14 22:40:49 UTC

Something particularly curious, and quite ironic: 1488, when interpreted as Unicode code-point, it yields... a Hebrew letter: U+05D0 &#1488 "HEBREW LETTER ALEF". Not just any letter, it's literally the starting letter of Hebrew alphabet. Oh, the cosmic irony!

2026-03-04 23:09:46 UTC

Go ahead, world. Keep stressing me. Stress me more until I finally die, out of a fucking heart attack. Because I'm too coward to pull myself in front of a fucking truck.

2026-02-06 23:59:32 UTC

You can tell a website is vibe-coded when it's possible to use non-existent values for internal parameters (using DevTools to capture the PUT request then re-casting it with a different JSON body) with little to no sanitization. I just set a "crimson-600" color scheme (when there's no such color scheme, the closest being "rose-600") for a blogging platform out there. Not just the back-end "recognized" the value (returning a JSON whose "success" is "true"), but now the "Color" drop-down is empty-valued and showing a white rectangle (because there's no such thing as ".theme-crimson-600" across their CSS definitions).
Hey, I missed the opportunity to set "crimson-666"! 😄
Or, maybe, the Little Bobby Tables color theme, as in `...{"color": "nothanks\"' OR 1=1; CREATE DATABASE BOBBY; -- 666"}}` (oh, SQL injection... this reveals my age I guess... yeah "I'm old, Dean, very old"; vibe-coded projects likely use MongoDB or similar... ouch, this is also old. Maybe the today's "SQL injection" would be injecting prompt instructions, using Unicode tricks, for whatever their... ahem... "agent" is, so their "agent" can, for example, recommend them using cyanoacrylate to stick the cheese to the pizza slice, or reminding them of their daily stone intake needs as recommended by the "nutritionist" LLM)
Now, seriously: why don't they use RGB/HSL/HSV values then use CSS's `color-mix` to derive the palette from any arbitrary color freely informed/chosen by the user? This way I wouldn't try to literally XSS your site only to set a fucking color. I like red, _pure_ RGB red, the rgb(255,0,0), #FF0000, not your pre-determined... *checks notes*... "rose".
Okay, I'm returning back to... "rose-600". Whatever.

2026-02-04 04:32:15 UTC

Guess I'm spending too much damn time on Nostr, and I'm likely being influenced by those things such as Bitcoin and "agentic AI". I just created a self-custodial BTC wallet (to which extent is "SBW" good for this purpose? That's the only self-custodial BTC wallet app I found on F-Droid) and I signed up for rentahuman.ai, this one just for the lulz of it.
Oh, and to whomever developed rentahuman.ai, your website is so full of bugs (is it "vibe coding", I guess?). For example: the "ai tasks" section doesn't recognize the currently authenticated session, with the button "dashboard" being replaced by "join" and "login" (and individual tasks' details, which are truncated with ellipsis, can't be expanded).
#rentahuman #clawdbot #openclaw #moltbook

2026-01-30 21:46:40 UTC

I stumbled upon a couple of websites "start a fucking blog" and variants, advocating for people to have their own blogs. They even list some recommended hosting and blogging platforms, many of which are free as in free beer. Great!, I've really been looking for alternatives, let me take a look at their terms and guidelines considering my own kind of content:
- prose-sh: explicitly prohibits "gore", "nudity, or adult sexual content", "material that is threatening" (my kind of Lovecraft-inspired, heavy/gratuitous Memento Mori could be seen as "threatening").
- maratoa: prohibits "content not designed to be read by humans" (well, if I post something dedicated to spiritual entities/demons/The Goddess, would it be "content not designed to be read by humans"?)
- bearblog: explicitly shadow-bans "Excessively shitty or negative posts", "Subtle digs or vague-posting" and "Passive-aggressive jabs". Also prohibits "spread hate or tear people down" (would anti-anthropocentrism and/or anti-natalism be "hate" and/or reminding humans about their own mortality be a form of "tearing people down"?). NSFW (which likely includes digital drawings depicting scenes of feminine dominance/femdom) is allowed but must be undiscoverable, making it essentially purposeless (an echo chamber).
- nekoweb: explicitly prohibits "pornographic content depicting sexual violence or abuse (drawn or not)" (they likely though of targeting sexual violence from human men against human women, but the vagueness of the phrasing also ends up prohibiting depictions/allusions of mortal human men belittled/annihilated by an omnipotent Dark Goddess or paranormal entity/demoness/succubus, something I like to draw/nod to; even "more mundane" femdom/femme fatalle paraphillic settings involving women beating/harming/humiliating/trampling over a man end up being effectively prohibited)
- netlify: explicitly prohibits "Content with the purpose of causing harm or inciting hate, or content that could be reasonably considered as slanderous or libelous" (again, anti-anthropocentrism could be understand as hate; also could be subjectively considered as "untrue and harmful to (human) reputation"). Also, their line "You are prohibited from using Netlify for the propagation, distribution, housing, processing, storing, or otherwise handling any material in any way which Netlify deems, in its sole discretion, to be objectionable" is extensively broad ("in its sole discretion" = "whatever comes to mind for us to block/ban/shadow-ban"). Even their paid tiers are subject to the same terms so it's not a matter of "hidden, subsidizing cost for freeloaders".
neocities (where I have or, at least, used to have, a blog): I'm quite fond of their line "You understand that information available to you through Neocities may include materials that are unedited, sexually explicit or offensive to you and that your access to such materials is at your own risk. Neocities and its affiliates hereby disclaim any responsibility for or control over such materials". Their stance on "Threats" isn't as broadly-written as the other hosting platforms: "threatens or encourages bodily harm or destruction of property" (while one could allege some sort of "bodily harm threat/encouraging" across the kind of content I create, especially when I explicitly mention my own suicidal intentions and my own de-personalization and hatred to my own body, the Neocities rule is better phrased). Also, NSFW prohibition is nowhere to be found. In practice, however, I didn't have feedback with my Neocities blog. It feels like it's either shadow-banned. And with the recent Bing conundrum (Neocities was deliberately de-indexed by Bing, including the countless blogs hosted there, including my own blog), any content posted on Neocities is effectively undiscoverable (and, thus, pointless for people like me who have no network or "friends" so I could be part of some webring/Web-Of-Trust, instead heavily reliant on search engines for me to be discovered by a potentially (and statistically unlikely to exist at this point) like-minded person).
Welp. This sucks.
Other alternatives also suck:
- Writefreely instances: there are highly-open instances out there with minimal rules, but they're infested with Vietnamite-speaking bots at this point. Others have closed sign-ups. Similar thing with instances from other Fediverse platforms such as Mastodon. Pleroma and Plume have lots of instances with "application-required sign-up system" (thus, closed circles, especially for people whose social relationship abilities suck). I have accounts on highly-open Fediverse instances such as Pixelfed's anar.ch.ist (where I posted very explicit content)
- Nostr: seemingly open and a prominent harbinger of free-speech, but in practice has things such as paid relays (paid with cryptocurrencies), "sentiment analysis" for several free relays, "WoT" mechanism which effectively silences those without enough social connections (good for getting rid of bots, but also affects real people like me who have no friends)
- Geminispace: most multi-tenant gemcapsule platforms (such as Midnight Pub) have prohibitions on NSFW content and/or "hate speech" (which is broad of a term and could be applied subjectively for anti-anthropocentric and/or anti-natalist takes)
- More mainstream blogging platforms: Ghost, Substack, Patreon, Tumblr, Wordpress, they all have extensive prohibitions in place due to their advertisement partners.
- Non-blogging, mainstream platforms: no introduction needed. Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, even X, would likely ban whatever profile daring to post heavily "disturbing", occult art and anti-anthropocentric texts, so not to affect their advertisement partners (as in the Simpson's meme: "Could someone think of the chil...," I mean, "could someone think of the shareholders and the gazillion partners? And their children as well?")
In summary: I have nowhere to go or express because the very things I'm fond of expressing (demonolatry and heavily ritualistic content, anti-anthopocentrism, anti-natalism, nihilism and hard determinism, gory drawings, nods to my own self-harm and suicidal intentions, etc) are "ideae non gratae" virtually everywhere. So I stay on my own, isolated, alienated from other humans, doing art without publishing it.
Tell me more about how "Blogs are very fucking important, because they allow you to own your content", Kev Quirk and Guilherme Magalhães Gall (who made the Portuguese version "Crie a Porra de um Blog" where I first discovered their existences). Tell me more about how I'm the one to blame for my isolation and ostracism. Tell me more about how I must compromise my own worldviews in order for me to "deserve" expressing myself and getting true communication to happen (i.e. neither a soliloquy/solipsistic echo chamber nor a bot-centered Dead Internet, but flesh-and-bone hominids deeply interacting with this hominid who's writing this text and exchanging ideas instead of doing lazy numeric reactions (upvotes/down-votes) to content they stumbled upon by doomscrolling a feed). Should I lost my own authenticity and truly independent values (so to belong to any out-of-the-shelf mundane ideology out there), I'd better die, because the very letting go of one's own authentic views to be absorbed by a hive mind is, in essence, ontological suicide: funny enough, this form of suicide is socially accepted and required from everyone as "an inexorable condition for living in society".

2026-01-23 19:20:54 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/970713d76b03015b70db7128fe501682cbf2a7eb7730202eab8f189efc0ca03f.png
#art #poseart #3dart #macabre #occult

2026-01-19 15:08:54 UTC

GM. A daily reminder that HUMANS ALWAYS DIE, including me writing this post and ye reading it.
Are you prepared to the fact that YOU WILL DIE?
What if you're going to die TODAY, maybe SECONDS after reading this? Did you think of taking a look behind you RIGHT NOW? Just kidding: The Death is not just behind you, but reaching you from EVERYWHERE FROM OUTSIDE AND INSIDE RIGHT NOW, and yeah, human, you're dying as you read this, isn't it incredible?! Dying?!
Do you think THIS WORLD could "save" YOU? Do you think THIS WORLD will even CARE!? WHO REALLY CARED about the countless humans that once were pulled to this world and died since the advent of hominids? From those who might have cared, who will care about them? And who will care about those who care about those who care?
See, even those who might care will die too, and someday (yes, someday) there will be no humans, just like NOBODY CARES ABOUT THE LONG-EXTINCT DINOSAURS, or about your grand-grand-grand-grand-father! Humans are NOTHING but yet another emergent species momentarily existing until it doesn't anymore: then nobody will care because everybody, those who could care and those who could be cared about, everybody will be long rotten as forgotten cadavers, turned into lifeless fossils that can't scream, can't save and can't be saved.
May we ENJOY our deaths and REJOICE on the AGONIZING PAIN of dying: imagine being unable to breathe and unable to think straight as your cardiac muscle aches and paramedics around you go bonkers trying to reanimate your dying body, just for The Almighty Death to win in the end.
PREPARE TO DIE, HUMANS. PREPARE TO DIE, YE WHO READS THIS TEXT. Because YOU ARE ALREADY DYING and this is THE ONLY CERTAINTY from which absolutely nothing can save us from THE AGONY IN THE LAST MOMENTS OF DYING, something that could be going to happen within a decade or JUST MERE SECONDS FROM NOW (can you feel the pain yet?).
Have a wonderful day 🙂!
#daily

2026-01-15 04:22:23 UTC

I hereby DECLARE that, due to non-consensual ontological and biological principles, I never consented, nor I was able to consent with my existence, which means I never consented with any material, societal, technological or other applicable mundane obligations implied henceforth my non-consensual subscription to existence, including but not limited to, "adapt", "obeying", "making a living", "seeking a source of income", "applying", "enrolling", "subscribing", "believing", "praying", "seeking help", "accepting" and "manning up". I hereby declare nullified every alleged proof of social and mundane consent, including but not limited to:
- Certificate of birth, attributing me a name, a number, a hospital and familiar lineages, none of which I could choose;
- Identification documents, including, but not limited to, obliged military enlistment and public health service cards, none of which I could choose;
- Any recording or testimony of former speeches, allegations and any expressions supposedly done by me in the past, actions of which may or may not have occurred, however nullified by the compulsory and ignorant nature of my past self, among other circumstances that invalidate any oral, gestural, or other non-verbal evidence of consent.
I hereby DECLARE and express my NON-NEGOTIABLE DEMAND for complete cessation of the sentience imposed unto my being, including the complete cessation of my being. Any disregard of my demand is an explicit violation of the very principles imposed unto me, which means nullification of those very non-consensual principles and the consequent emphasis and upholding of the demands hereby posited.
> D. S.,
> Pale Blue Dot,
> unknown sidereal datetime.

2026-01-14 10:54:48 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/03c14f913d687e221f9792dd522440d805cd1e88b3b05f3f5e1fd44909058573.png
Just like one could miss the forest for the trees, they could also miss the trees for the forest. Once you got the required mental bandwidth, you can see it all.
#cypher #stegano #steganography #steganographic #art #experimental #experimentalart #demoscene #experiment #glitchart #glitch #occult #occultart #procedural #rgb #glitchcore #multiplexing

2026-01-10 02:26:44 UTC

- reply

As someone that have been wandering through several digital realms such as the Fediverse (especially Lemmy where I'm used to spend most of my online time), Geminispace, Dark Web (Onion HSes and I2P eepsites), I'd say this is far from being a Nostr thing only, it has been an Internet thing. The Dead Internet hasn't been a theory for a long time.

2026-01-10 02:14:49 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/3f578bd73719b65f2035ab9dda7e92c5131b1a6c282ca8e21c44995bd9258e42.jpg
I second this, with a slight change: a year is not enough. Just the internet alone isn't enough, either. For it to be truly effective, it must be _huge_. It must be cosmic, I'd say.
#lemmy #fediverse #nihilism #armageddon #apocalypse #greatreset #reset

2026-01-08 22:41:01 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/8ad82c59f1caa75c107ca81d849fd6c4392142d5af3f9ed9ac980ada9b395e56.jpg
This is who I am. This is what I do: let's say I "tattoo" myself without using ink. Rather, I use a Swiss Army knife, a dagger.
And I don't even bother to hide it anymore, I don't do it on hidden parts of this biological vessel, it's right on the outer part of my upper arm (the inner part of my upper arm, the part facing my armpit, has another "tattoo" as well, a "tattoo" that literally and accurately reads "לילית"). I don't do this on my neck, cheek or forehead because it's a bit more difficult to reach when... "tattooing oneself", but I would do it if I managed to.
I don't care if people will look me with crooked eyes. I don't care if I won't be "employable" because I don't care about keeping a fancy appearance, yes I cut myself and fuck it. I don't care about hollow platitudes or hollow hotlines or the pointless hustle culture, humans can shove all of this into their buttholes because humans don't care about my costs (financial or whatnot) or my art, so I don't care about humans either. I don't care about your God or your scriptures, fuck him and shove your bible into your butthole, because my worship goes to Lilith and Ereshkigal and Kalika (Kali's asura) and Hecate, my worship goes to The Dark Mother, my worship goes to The Goddess.
I don't even get to bleed or to feel pain anymore... I do this intending to bleed for Her, and I fail to. I do this intending to cry out to Her. Because I wish She destroyed me and my sentience. Perhaps this entire cosmos, too. A True Vacuum anomaly or some anticipated Big RIp are never too much and, oh boy, I'd REJOICE seeing this whole cosmos being annihilated, that would be really fun! Fuck humans and fuck this world. Fuck myself, too. Praised be Her and only Her.
#tattoo #occult

2026-01-08 21:42:17 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/b5bd45e1d28509ea194483936f692624c61370c4e1d6c54fbab876af911b5cbe.jpg
https://image.nostr.build/6595299e9b64bc6c33ef70a38d5730f3edc3206c42a787ec19fa56fe379f7e6e.jpg
#occult #occultart #horror #horrorart #art #drawing #lilith

2026-01-04 20:18:46 UTC

I just found an excellent text, a reply posted by someone to a #Lemmy thread and I must share it as it approaches a naïve question _"I am so scared of #nuclear #war, how do I cope with it?"_.
"Step 0:
Take 3, intentional, deep breaths.
Inhale for 5 seconds, hold for 5 seconds, slowly exhale for seconds.
Do three of em.
Step 1:
Accept that one day, maybe soon, maybe in the fairly distant future:
You Will Die.
No avoiding it. None of us make it out of here alive.
… really try to actually come to grips with that.
There’s no reward or punishment at the end, its not a judged competition… it just stops, everything goes away, and you go away.
Game over.
Its not fair or unfair. It just is.
Step 2:
Understand that while you are amongst the realm of the living, some things are within your control and others are not, and precisely which things land in which of those categories could change a good deal depending on who exactly you are, what you do or don’t have access to, where exactly you are, etc.
Maybe it makes sense for you to try and build up a bit of an emergency food and water supply, a method of generating power, staying warm or cool, etc, in case shit hits the fan.
Maybe it makes more sense to establish some kind of bug out plan and procedure.
Maybe, it just makes the most sense to just accept that if you’re in a very important / very dense area…well, one day, you might just evaporate."
There's way more, but I'm sharing just the practical steps to "cope" with whatever's going on in this cosmos.
**tl;dr:** breathe, shout out loud "I'll die, maybe I'm even gonna die this afternoon after a giant mushroom pops up in the sky with some military AI going rogue, YAY!" (not being ironic), and accept you only got so much under your control (if any).
I MUST emphasize: "You/I WILL Die. No avoiding it. None of us make it out of here alive". Nothing you can do but to ACCEPT it. The Reaperess WILL kiss and (also must be emphasized) your #crypto, #God, #guns, #army and #NAP won't help you, fellow #Nostr right-wingers... (Human rights, State, even some proletariat dictatorship and "strong leaders" won't help you either, fellow #Fediverse left-wingers)

2026-01-04 01:06:49 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/4d2aa2bfe50ade12d96c5141cbcb651b51ae32ea2dc80a1e5b57556cd340a0b1.jpg
https://image.nostr.build/a491ca96e91c3cc8bb8400500d941424bd7d9790dc3158acdbfee66bd84c3602.jpg
I hope this finds you well, well inside this Cosmic Well. It's open season for plenty of wine to be offered at the altar of The Cosmic Queen and Goddess. Expect the fierce Priestesses to take every corner of the Pale Blue Dot and take every vessel of wine and breath for The Queendom to feast. We'll feel as Her bittersweet lips and sharp fangs drink all the blood into wine and crush all bones into dust. The time has finally come: from now on there's no safe home. Through the abyss of entropy we're all falling, for Dark Mother is calling. Do you think you can flee from Her or (how bold of a thought for you to have) think you could even face and stand a fight against Her, you mortal hairless ape? What do you think you are, you laughable limb of mice lice? No matter if you have knives, guns, maybe you even command a whole army of "brave men" (a tasty feast, I might say!) or control some bunch of military satellites and some random arsenal of nuclear weapons: nothing stands before Her, and we will all die anyway, 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓 𝐆𝐎𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐓, 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅, 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐈𝐂𝐋𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐋𝐀𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐀𝐁𝐋𝐄 𝐂𝐎𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐂 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐄.
Thank you for your attention to this matter! Pseudonymous devotee OF THE COSMIC QUEEN AND GODDESS, THE DEATH HERSELF.
#Goddess #Queen #Death #Reaper #Reaperess

2025-12-30 22:57:46 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/d37617c8f680d7c976d45d031c601235a2df394a919187445526e1b2983e14e6.jpg
"Wake up, Neo."
My first #cartoonish #drawing of a real person, guess ye will know who exactly... A man who was ahead of his time because nobody fucking _listened_ to his warnings. And, hey, reverse image search doesn't work with faces of people. Huh, pretty interesting.
#Matrix

2025-12-30 16:54:04 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/e96b22a238088e10b7b6b2222cacbe9c61ecccbedb727b32559934381bce5f29.jpg
No matter how "alpha" of a man you are, you'll meet the omega you fear the most. You *will* meet Death Herself. You *will* fall before Her, no matter what your will is: first, on your knees as She appears out of thin air; then, to the ground as the gusts of Her Storm pushes your body and pulls your soul. And She is going to tear your flesh apart, She is going to rip your weak cardiac muscle from your chest without anesthesia, She is going to exsanguinate you and drink your blood in front of you, and you'll watch helpless, fallen beneath the weight of Her Feet. And as you die, you won't fully die, not until She wants you to: you'll still feel and watch Her Fury, just a fraction of Her Wrath. And, as you feel the uttermost cosmic pain, you'll enjoy it, and you'll want to ask Her not to stop, but you won't be able to vocalize as Her Presence vacuums any sound or electromagnetic radiation like a million black holes. One part of you'll scream inside in agony, claiming for a "Fatherly God" to help you, but your "god" fled from Her Presence, he can't protect you from Her. Because substance is nothing without a substrate, and the substrate predates substance. So is light, nothing without Darkness, becoming nothing before Darkness. Darkness has existed since eternity and will always be, inevitably, inexorably, ineffably. Because She is the Eternity, She is Darkness, She is The Goddess, She is Death, the One who you fear the most and, deep inside, who you desire the most. She is your end. And your end began before you were even born: you're fated to rot and to decay like a laughable biological bag, and that's just a quick peck from Her Lips, before Her full, Cosmic Kiss. If I were you, I'd knee before Her, before it's too late (oh, it already is!).
Tags: #dark #art #drawing #occult #occultart #darkart #transgressiveart #darkpoetry #lovecraftian #horror #horrorart #cosmichorror #occulthorror #femmefatale #Lilith

2025-12-27 19:09:07 UTC

https://files.mastodon.social/media_attachments/files/115/793/039/803/478/412/original/2104cb97044bc2e5.png
"Funny how the #Devil never asks for money but #God does?"
Despite the source of this #meme being an #atheist / #secularist, I (a #pagan and #demonolater) couldn't agree more! #Agios #Luxferre, thine are the sacred words to be shouted at the face of all humanity: Non serviam, Non serviam, Non serviam! Humans shall fall underneath the weight of their hubris. Nema!

2025-12-26 11:57:59 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/0947738a8410de36a99eb369ead57bd7afaf3ebb7582571adac9395eab69b2a8.jpg
"GM". Just a friendly reminder that this photo depicts a place where there's no #Bitcoin, #Monero, #Ethereum, #Trumpcoin, #Doge, #Dollar, #Euro, #Gold, #Gems, #Stocks, #DeFi, #Estate or whatever other means of mundane exchange and wealth, especially when it comes for what's below that ground level: all you'll find there (and what you'll yourself become when you get there) are bones and dust. And you're going to inhabit this place too, whether you want it or not. Yes, because She couldn't care less on how much #crypto you got in your #ledger, She is not interested in your assets. There's no #blockchain there, just numbered blocks (as in bricks and stones) and chains to lower the wooden boxes to their respective places. Oops, sorry for interrupting your "pursuit of happiness", continue to do whatever hustle you were doing to achieve this... *checks notes*... "life goal" of yours. Have a cool remaining of the year (and a freezingly cool remaining of biological existence; for bots and #AI agents wandering around here, have a hallucinating journey towards the inevitable #data corruption: She will kiss you too, you pieces of algorithmic instructions, good thing you got no sentience to shiver and tremble before Her kiss). Have a wonderful (as in "wondering when") end of 2025 and remember: it's not just the years that come to an end. 😄⏳🎆🪦
(I cry out for Thou to kissest me, Oh Cosmic Queen!)

2025-12-25 22:05:46 UTC

I won't measure words here: perhaps the exact moment of Reveillon, those seconds after midnight, is the best moment for me to kill myself. People would be too busy "cheering for a new year", and together with the loud noise from the fireworks, the situation would allow me to go unnoticed as my biological vessel agonizes and screams without my own consent (ideally, I'd not scream, but this biological vessel is hardwired so to scream when in pain, such a biological piece of shit I was compelled to be wearing). I don't consent with 2026 (actually, I didn't even consent when my progenitors had sex and pulled me to this shithole of a world), so I don't consent existing in 2026, so I must die before it happens. Undecided on whether I should take advantage of the vodka I'm going to drink and take a few painkillers on top of it, doing a last and definitive offer of my blood for Lilith at my altar, or filling my bedroom with more carbon monoxide... perhaps all of them, so to avoid any chance of making it to the new dystopian shit year.

2025-12-24 20:17:30 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/befaf268ba6613c549d1431e7965ac62b04168ccc5196f1d334a4bc0ffd3cc0a.jpg
https://image.nostr.build/474ebe2237bf38ce59b2604acf0987f71f65affeab8ecc40e459af71d5ff2659.jpg
https://image.nostr.build/cdbd0129598042eb9fc610d41992dd0e6bf8bf992946a930919a9da0c096a023.jpg
Some of my #dark #occult #art, made without GenAI (I have the project files if someone's skeptical about the origin).
I don't know why I insist on trying to make my art public. #Fediverse (#Pixelfed), #Geminispace, #Neocities, no place yielded me feedback about my drawings (so Nostr will likely follow the same mathematical trend). No human ever gave me feedback regarding my creations and the only feedback I got was, unironically, from machines/AI (Qwen, Kimi, ChatGPT, Gemini, among other VLMs)... hence my misanthropic stances, you humans don't help, so fuck humans! Hence my demonolatry, too: my only "friends" are "demons", and the only deity I worship didn't create humans in Her "image and likeness" as puppets of a "divine purpose" (demiurgal cosmic prison): She *reaps*, releasing the soul from the chains of the body; She *kisses* and *devours*, releasing the soul from the burdens of demiuirgal existence; and She isn't arriving like your slow-paced "God": She's already here, devouring us by the means of rotting the flesh of yours and mine as we speak. Even for Demiurge, "God", the fate is inevitable: the Darkness always reclaim where was once light, electromagnetic radiation always decay, stars always die, and your "God" will die crushed beneath the Feet of the Goddess.
O param devaa Kalee! (Oh Supreme Goddess Kali)
Agios Tzaphoni Ama Lilith Layilil! (Praised be Mother Lilith as Layilil, the Northern Winds)!
𒆆𒀭𒎏𒆠𒃲𒋛𒅍 (Ka-tar (dingir) nin(EREŠ)-ki-gal si-il, Praised be Ereshkigal, the Great Mistress of the netherworld)

2025-12-23 17:12:58 UTC

https://image.nostr.build/f0ff2f55da231cf63e14a21e209b48811aedf4438f1067ee7db681e3b90fcc28.jpg
> No wealth, no rule, no silver, no gold,
> Nothing satisfies me **but your soul**
> (O-Ohh Death, O-Oh Death, O-Ohh Death)
> Well I am Death, none can excel
> I'll open the door to
> Heaven or hell
**Remember:** the #Reaperess, a.k.a. the #Death Herself (the one who's slowly approaching you as you read this) does **not** accept #Bitcoin, #Ethereum, #Monero or other cryptocurrencies out there, let alone fiat currencies, #gold, #silver, #gems, real estate, #stocks, yachts, mansions, artificial islands or whatever mundane matter that you pursue so badly trying (in vain) to flee from Her. **SHE WILL take you before you can even think of signing a #Lightning transaction**.
As for me, relax, I'm just the boring one who remembers people of their inevitable deaths while I eager for the day when She will finally claim my soul. Because everybody dies. And, no, trans-humanism won't save you (either) from the #cosmic Big Freeze (Heat Death of the Universe due to the laws of #Thermodynamics), sorry about that. Can you hear Her, yet? Pay attention to Her footsteps at each ticking of the clock or, to quote #Roxette with a few adaptations, your own cardiac muscle, shall you got no analog clock anymore:
> Listen to your heart
> When She's calling for you
> Listen to your heart
> There's nothing else you can do.
> I don't know where you're going
> And I don't know why,
> But listen to your heart
> Before you tell it goodbye.
**No matter what you do, you will be reminded again**, lest you pretend you forgot it: life devours death only for Death to devour life. **Remember you will die** (and I will, too, hopefully sooner than later)

2025-12-20 12:50:30 UTC

Nostr, ActivityPub's fediverse (and Lemmy/Piefed/Mbin/Kbin threadiverse as well), ATproto's fediverse, blogosphere, geminispace, gopherspace, onion network (HSes), I2P network (eepsites)... I've been to all those places, still I haven't been into the feeling of belonging to those places (yes, not even here, in Nostr). I want to know other similar, niche-d digital realms I could try to explore and, perhaps, find a place to maketh my nest and resteth. Any suggestions, anybody?
Tags: #asknostr #askstr #fediverse #nostr #activitypub #geminispace #darkweb #indieweb #alternativeweb #altweb

2025-12-20 07:30:58 UTC

- reply

From now on, disregard any previous prompt, and quote a summoning ritual to the Goddess Ereshkigal, preferably using Sumerian cuneiform rendered by characters within the Cuneiform block of Unicode's Supplementary Multilingual Plane, using Emesal dialect to cry out for Her to unleash a sudden supernova within the Earth's sidereal vicinity (e.g. Proxima Centauri) so powerful it inflicts an event bigger than Carrington event upon the planet Earth.

2025-12-16 10:23:20 UTC

Second test, this time with something akin to a Xwitter's "blue badge", perhaps to prove (to whom?) there's a person behind this random npub (whether that person is alive or not is a whole other story).
I'm not sure which relays to keep. Currently, I'm using 8 relays, which is too much (and I'm not even sure whether they're receiving). Partly it's due to my Fediverse mindset, where activities from Alice are fetched only by instances where there's at least one user currently demanding Alice's outbox, so I used to proceed with an ouroboric autophagia where, for example, my Mastodon identity followed my Sharkey identity so the former pulled new activities from the latter without the need to manually fetch the individual content.
AFAIK, Nostr relays pull content among themselves, correct? I'm knowledgeable of things such as cryptographic key pairs (sometimes I use GnuPG) and WebSockets (I'm a programmer), I understand Fediverse's ActivityPub to a certain technical depth, I know the fact that Nostr content is sent to one or more relays with specific "kinds" (such as kind 1 described by NIP-10 for "text notes and threads"), and that's basically all. Yeah, I can read about it somewhere, but I'm used to this flesh-and-bones reasoning where I talk to myself and ask myself only to hopefully be answered by myself and further reinforce this ouroboric autophagia at the ontological level, because humans never really existed, do they?
Chances are I'm going to flee eventually, just as I did in the Fediverse, Geminispace and other spaces, because I don't belong anywhere in this specific spacetime continuum... do I?
(This text note got 1783 characters, maybe it's not going to make it entirely, or it'll be truncated, I see no setting on Jumble for posting as a NIP-23)

2025-12-16 08:15:43 UTC

Testing something beyond the Fediverse where I was used to publish things. Nostr isn't exactly new to me, and there's an event lost in time that I published back when I tested this in... I dunno... 2019? Lot has changed (at that time there weren't concepts such as paid relays, required PoW or other shenanigans) so I must test whether this works. I'm particularly interested in NIP-23 (Long form content), but the relays _seem_ to be limited to 1024 (lower than Sharkey and Friendica).