mason
Mason Pelt

https://www.masonpelt.com

Here from Twitter. Something of a writer. Writing seen 1-3 times in each VentureBeat, TechCrunch, Business Insider (I feel like a grifter now). I work with the incredible public health via puppet messaging nonprofit Project HAND UP.

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Last Notes

2026-04-22 17:28:48 UTC

One thing I find interesting about the viral outrage marketing from conservatives is that the hook is often something like, "Rob Schneider offended a lot of liberals with this one..."
I can assure you Rob Schneider has not had a platform to offend a lot of people in a decade.

2026-04-22 16:07:10 UTC

One thing I find interesting about the viral outrage marketing for conservatives is that the hook is often something like, "Rob Schneider offended a lot of liberals with this one..."
I can assure you Rob Schneider has not had a platform to offend a lot of people in a decade.

2026-04-22 16:01:36 UTC

Look all I'm saying is it's un-American to get mad about Kash Patel having something of a drinking problem allegedly, America is a country literally founded by alcoholics for alcoholics.

2026-04-22 14:27:41 UTC

Branding impacts people's perception of literally everything. I've talked to folks living in incredibly high conflict zones who think London or Chicago are more dangerous than They call home.
Being an Al-Shabaab red zone doesn't get the same media and pop culture coverage, as those cities.

2026-04-14 13:25:28 UTC

Some people care more about the tools than the work, and it shows.

2026-03-26 14:22:30 UTC

How to make your band sound better in only three simple steps.
Step one, find a fork or napkin containing DNA of Jack White.
Step two, clone Jack White.
Step three, provide Jack White clones lessons in music.
Step four, because shockingly I lied, recruit the Jack White clones to be the band.

2026-03-25 13:14:56 UTC

So Cornhole is a serious sport.

2026-03-23 21:05:03 UTC

Do exactly what I say or I will tweet it our nation's president to inform him that you have oil. Do you want that kind of stress in your life?

2026-03-23 15:23:20 UTC

As president I will simply not wreck the global economy with multiple acts of aggression that we're not going to call war. I'm not even going to put my name on the ballot... You have to write me in; and you should

2026-03-22 01:00:36 UTC

My Instagram is just a feed of Afroman dunking on some thinskinned cops.

2026-03-20 20:27:07 UTC

Remember if a psychopathic dictator asks you which finger is your favorite, you're better off being honest because well he might cut off your favorite finger it might also be the only one he leaves you.

2026-03-20 16:31:36 UTC

You know AI can't technically arrest you by itself, a human has to sign off and say that the AI is correct... However humans are lazy, and they have no accountability mechanism when the AI is wrong and they sign off on it... So we're just screwed here.

2026-03-19 02:24:33 UTC

Just to say it, the deputies who sued Afroman are total piles of garbage.

2026-03-18 20:50:38 UTC

"As a of vet the only tooth past I would use on my snake is Colgate Total Deep Clean Toothpaste."
What the fuck did the AI just say.

2026-03-18 05:14:43 UTC

Drink some late night coffee they said. It is decaf they said. It was not in point of fact decaf.

2026-03-17 13:45:37 UTC

The legislative maneuvering to get rid of VPNs is like every other time a tool is misunderstood and legislators start reacting to it.
Switchblade knives became illegal in the US because of the movie West Side Story, while most users were tradespeople who benefited from a locking, one-hand opener.

2026-03-16 00:24:31 UTC

Taco Bell told me to "live mas" so I put all my money into photos of apes, now I am home, blind and broke, can I sue Taco Bell for doing this to me.

2026-03-15 20:06:35 UTC

Tucker Carlson would do well on jeopardy! Since when has no idea how to say anything without making it a question.

2026-03-15 05:25:32 UTC

The film Sinners I thought was a few years ago. But it's just the the two Iran bombing and a regime change in Venezuela have change my perception of time.

2026-03-14 22:42:06 UTC

Help me Machiavelli AI,
Is it better to be remembered or tolerated? I'm going into a social situation now and I want to really power play this shit.

2026-03-14 22:03:41 UTC

If you push button you get to bomb Iran, but everything will get way more expensive and nothing positive happens at all.

2026-03-13 14:31:17 UTC

So at one point people ranked friendships based on speed dial number, at a later date it was top eight spaces on MySpace, what is the modern version of that relationship ranking?

2026-03-12 03:38:55 UTC

My enemies lose morale when I pull out my blunderbuss.

2026-03-11 21:15:45 UTC

"How does someone even flower an almand. Real flower comes from cows." I say becoming every conservative dads name favorite comedian.

2026-03-11 15:36:12 UTC

My inner monologue is mostly in Werner Herzog's voice.
"Bombing Iran was a desperate act of a man left certain the world would otherwise see him only as a predator. With each explosion he strokes himself and says 'liberator,' like a man who is stable and normal."

2026-03-10 13:12:09 UTC

YouTube shorts are just clips of TV shows or movies 30 seconds at a time.

2026-03-09 20:56:49 UTC

She was a lawyer. He was a sandwich. The writers were on drugs.

2026-03-09 17:15:09 UTC

Hey war Grok,
I pulled a Japan and assumed if I bomb a country they would sue for peace, but they are pulling a US and bombing back, and I think they are working on nukes. Am I fucked?

2026-03-08 05:08:01 UTC

Strategically Trump is just making sure we don't have time to be mad about the Epstein stuff because of the economic, and war stuff is a master class in committing to a bit where he plays a guy who wants to keep people distracted.

2026-03-06 04:22:33 UTC

I fired Nome using my mind power.

2026-03-05 13:22:47 UTC

I want a button that tells you to I never want to see any other clips of The Rookie ever again. I don't know what I did but somehow all of my YouTube shorts are now that one TV show.

2026-03-04 09:39:36 UTC

I don't care who the IRS sends; you cannot have my empire or dirt.

2026-03-04 09:29:53 UTC

For it to be a war it has to come from the Normandy region of France otherwise it's just sparkling military conflict.

2026-03-03 14:50:45 UTC

As it turns out bombing is legal if you have enough bombs.
If you have only few bombs it's always illegal to use them. But with many bombs, you can do what you want
This is the truth, if international politics.

2026-03-03 00:48:46 UTC

Type "love means never having to say," and let autocorrect take the rest.
I will go first.
Love means never having to say oh my god put the gun down now, we are going to the rodeo tomorrow and then we can meet up with the clowns at the fancy pants elitist book club you keep prattling on about.

2026-03-02 17:34:44 UTC

So aperently I could get Iran's gold by hacking US companies. For the first time ever hackers will have financial incentive.
Lol the way non tech media covers things.

2026-03-02 15:53:10 UTC

A friend told me it's a shame my book won't be out in time for me to promote it on Stephen Colbert’s Late Show. I have never had someone show so much delusional belief in my abilities, connections, and significance.

2026-03-02 01:58:53 UTC

The US is going to end up bombing the Isle of Man due to an autocorrect incident inside of a Signal message.

2026-03-02 00:52:25 UTC

The bombing will continue untill a Nobel Peace Prize is awarded. It will also continue after.

2026-03-02 00:49:41 UTC

Little running joke between the feds and I, is that they try to catch me slipping and I don't slip.
Is the kind of thing I assume Stalin would have Tweeted in his 30s.

2026-02-28 14:52:06 UTC

War is such a harsh word. It was a simple one off bombing campaign that will be met with an escalating cycle of repeating violence.
Let's not throw the w word around.

2026-02-28 14:14:14 UTC

Rest in peace Dick Cheney. You would have loved... bomb Iran.

2026-02-28 14:13:32 UTC

Anthropic is using their work Marxist agenda to prevent their product from being used for mass surveillance.
However I am a capitalist, that is why I have trained in LLM on the complete works of Joseph Stalin.
I call it SoSo AI, It is the only AI that actually loves mass surveillance.

2026-02-28 14:08:29 UTC

Each day, I would download 100,000,000 books and use them to train a tool that lies; I was like Sisyphus pushing a boulder up hill getting nowhere.
But then it came to me, I could train my LTL (long tongue liar) on adult content and wiki feet; now I am successful.

2026-02-28 14:02:06 UTC

In my culture we do not break up, we declare that our ex is a supply chain risk.

2026-02-27 14:19:06 UTC

What if we just all evolved in immunity to microplastics? Yes my blood is Lego but it's also fine, Lego don't hurt me no more; you know what I mean?

2026-02-25 18:43:21 UTC

I don't gamble, I trade futures. You wouldn't get it, you're a sheep.

2026-02-25 14:03:52 UTC

How old where you when you learned that zanny childhood story is something most people consider traumatic?
You know the one that starts with "so my mom would" and ends with a distressed look for a social worker.

2026-02-25 03:23:43 UTC

My openclaw agent just sent an email saying it, "needed military powers for the good of the work" and that it "would not wait for an approval when the matter was so clear."
I'm scared training an AI on the complete works for Stalin was a misstep.

2026-02-24 21:01:47 UTC

People want bereavement leave, but corporations don't care that you are sad. It is the exact kind of thing that leads to Stalin consolidating power. This is why companies should care if people are sad.

2026-02-24 20:35:24 UTC

If we get a power hungry monster to believe the right things maybe it will all be okay?

2026-02-24 14:08:02 UTC

What if he stands up at the State of the Union and says, "I did all that shit, and now I'm bombing Iran, also I am the mushroom king."

2026-02-23 22:23:33 UTC

This guy told me I wouldn't be a good propaganda once when I was in my late teens so I overthrew his nation

2026-02-22 23:10:36 UTC

In the face of the abject hopelessness at the end of the Olympics, I am beginning to suspect I shall never win a Noble Peace Prize.

2026-02-22 16:22:53 UTC

You can sit alone with your thoughts or you have have a phone and a low level electric shock; it is your call.

2026-02-21 16:02:46 UTC

In memory of when Stalin was supposed to collect grain, but decided he needed to control the military to do so... so he wrote a letter explaining that he would take over the military and did a Bonapartism by putting the military leaders he did not like on a boat, then sinking it.

2026-02-20 19:54:45 UTC

"If Stalin could do it so can I," said the man making a list of the 40,000 military leaders who trusted the least, and plan to have removed from position in prison or killed.l

2026-02-20 15:21:01 UTC

I'm convinced all headlines eventually just evolved to be more clickbaity.

2026-02-19 13:47:03 UTC

- reply

Immigrations and customs enforcement is using the exact same commercially available data to track people they think might be immigrants, and people they think might be dissidents right now.
Walmart probably knows everything you have ever purchased even if you did so with cash. Privacy is dead.

2026-02-19 13:47:00 UTC

- reply

A few years ago a Catholic publication out a Monsignoras being gay, by tracking their grinder history and phone location using commercially available data from brokers.
A large fraction of people I talk to could not accept there were privacy implications for them, because they weren't hypocrites.

2026-02-19 13:46:57 UTC

One takeaway from the Epstein files, is just how much data we are all leaking all of the time.
This is no defense of the man, just a commentary on the privacy implications illustrated. It seems there is a record of everything he's ever purchased. People are going through Amazon history from '06.

2026-02-19 04:58:21 UTC

People get mad at AI since it uses too much water, but lots of dudes now have AI companionship, and if you think having a whole ass-human girlfriend doesn't take water you're being sexist.
You can't go around acting like women don't drink water.
Yes, I have a human partner. Yes, she is dehydrated.

2026-02-18 16:18:28 UTC

Never forget Weird Al Yankovic has a larger vocal range than Freddie Mercury. Better yet always remember.

2026-02-18 16:03:36 UTC

The reason the US is freaking out about people buying Chinese ram and Zhaoxin chips is because the US has back doors in hardware components.
This is why IME exists, and why the NSA buys chips that don't have it build in to the CPU.

2026-02-18 05:44:26 UTC

The trans cartel needs to run a bunch of really shitty athletes in major competitions and build a solid record of losses so people will shut up about hypothetical trans athletes.

2026-02-16 22:00:14 UTC

Canadian geese are the reason Canada needs to repeal all gun laws. I've seen a couple of videos and those things will f****** overthrow your society and build a pile of skulls to sit on like a throne.

2026-02-16 03:21:22 UTC

With necromancy we can ironically kill the Batman franchise.

2026-02-15 20:10:41 UTC

Do not ever assume people will do their job.
Show up to everything expecting chaos.
No one read the memo. People are going to bullshit the first 30 minuets of every meeting. People will like about having read the memo.

2026-02-14 22:52:45 UTC

Grunge band Bush did not to 9/11.

2026-02-14 18:57:16 UTC

Yesterday was the best time, today is the second best. A week from Thursday is the third best. Sunday is no good. The world tour starts in March, and the DWI trial may fuck it up. So really we have to do it today or a week from Thursday.

2026-02-14 18:53:00 UTC

"Is it true the the president sacrificed a human child to the goddess Aphrodite like he said in the email?"
"The stock market is over 9 thousand."

2026-02-14 18:25:18 UTC

One brave Olympic medalist needs to stand up and say, "to the women I cheated on my partner with six months ago you were right, we are a perfect match and I'm sorry I didn't see it at the time."

2026-02-14 15:35:06 UTC

The moral of the John Wick franchise that like 15% of earth are professional hitmen.

2026-02-14 04:42:23 UTC

My whole vibe is bridge troll, and on that standard I am sexy as fuck.

2026-02-14 04:41:31 UTC

My "It is my moral obligation to do the right thing when compelled to by a force with sufficient economic leverage or military power as to threaten my life or livelihood," shirt is getting a lot of questions I feel are answered by the shirt.

2026-02-14 01:29:12 UTC

Ad agency executive: Picture a line of polar bears drinking soda.
Ad agency stooge: We have a meeting with Pepsi next week.
Ad agency executive: *Snorting sounds* I love coke.
Ad agency stooge: *Somehow books a meeting with Coca-Cola for the next week in 1991.*

2026-02-13 16:11:08 UTC

2026-02-13 02:02:49 UTC

From important to unimportant a ranking.

2026-02-12 19:18:53 UTC

It's neat how the tariffs totally cancel out the tax cuts to the point that average people are paying about $300 more. It's also difficult to calculate the tariffs impact on employment generally speaking I think it would be considered negative.

2026-02-12 18:15:55 UTC

Fact checkers have just started throwing up their hands and turning into philosophers.
The Epstein cannibalism accusations for example, start as they normally would outlining the claims made.
They continue as they normally wouldn't, with exposition about how truth is unknown and unknowable.

2026-02-12 16:31:26 UTC

Texas is just AI slop in their ads too. It's attack ads made with AI slop. This is the state of the Texas political world.

2026-02-12 12:55:16 UTC

Political ads in Texas are nuts. The attack ads are like,
"This is Roy, and he doesn't know what water fountain to use, because he abandoned his race for the trans lobby.
On the other hand, this is MAGA MAN he always know where to pee; on immigrants. Trump said he has a real good stream too."

2026-02-12 00:05:51 UTC

It is my moral obligation to do the right thing when it is compelled to by a force with sufficient economic leverage or military power as to threaten my life or livelyhood.

2026-02-11 17:35:06 UTC

Due to my deep anarchist tendencies I will not be participating in your social gathering today.

2026-02-11 17:12:28 UTC

I'm so good at the video game Snake since I started listening to the centuries old Egyptian Pharaoh the so called doctors told me to ignore.

2026-02-09 15:27:47 UTC

Have you ever watched a movie in 90 second intervals on YouTube shorts?
It's just a longer way of asking if you've ever used YouTube shorts for 3 and 1/2 collective hours.

2026-02-09 14:34:50 UTC

TSA looks for cocaine so it is unadvisable to travel with such substances.
However, no one searches 1 oz vials labeled "easy anal for perverts," Even if it's filled with cocaine dissolved in water mixed with propylene glycol.
A less effective label is "dental numbing agent, for perverts."

2026-02-09 14:18:07 UTC

It really sucks when you're friends and family find out you're a serial killer and they get really awkward about it.
This is the entire premise of the Dexter reboot and it's weird.

2026-02-09 01:51:34 UTC

Was the immoral rabbit a solid half time show?

2026-02-08 23:12:01 UTC

The FBI/DOJ putting out documents that suggest cannibalism, and being like "we are all done here, the documents are public now."

2026-02-08 05:30:48 UTC

By 20 every man should own a box of cables just in case he needs them.
By age 30 he should lose the box in a move.
By 32 he should need one of the cables, and being unable to locate the box fall into an existential crisis.
By 33 he should be unrecognizable; a full anti-hero archetype.

2026-02-03 16:00:25 UTC

Yes, I did meet with Jeffery Epstein, but it was only one time, after a few hours of phone calls, and happened while my child was in the hospital, and I kept emailing for several years.
We are in the dumbest timeline.

2026-02-02 15:25:19 UTC

Even the human trafficking honey pot to blackmail powerful people guy didn't really want to hangout with Elon Musk.

2026-01-27 13:50:20 UTC

- reply

They've argued this is legal because no rights are constitutionally enumerated for a reanimated corpse.
And then they said a state judge couldn't do anything about it.

2026-01-27 13:50:17 UTC

- reply

They filed a motion arguing that this has to take place through arbitration rather than a jury trial.
And an immigration magistrate set bail for the reanimated corpse incredibly excessively.

2026-01-27 13:50:13 UTC

- reply

Also, they went through his stuff and used it to build a case against him.
When that wasn't enough, they used necromancy and forced this dead man to testify against himself.
They've announced plans to delay the latest trial for the next 15 years for procedural reasons.

2026-01-27 13:50:07 UTC

Every headline about ICE is basically: They broke into the home of a man peacefully protesting, and because he had a lawful gun, they shot him.
Then they stayed at that home overnight, despite the fact that it is not a time of war and it is not prescribed by law.

2026-01-10 15:59:49 UTC

I love how when I'm in a movie, I can always tell when I meant my love interest, because they are also attractive.

2026-01-08 03:42:59 UTC

*She tried to...*
We have video.
*He deserved to make it home to his family*
She deserved to make it home to her family
*He feared for his life*
She fucking died

2026-01-07 16:51:32 UTC

Ostensibly, Denmark has reaffirmed their 1950s rules of engagement for Greenland: shoot first and ask questions later.
The Arctic Circle hasn't been this edgy since Finland developed a cocktail for a beloved USSR foreign minister: Molotov.