robotbrain
a

the dreamer being dreamed
. . .
poetry, grey matter and btc

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npub1hkclf0wgykx7g4qvwkw2nr68tlfd4xhrha8vquk3cqxjear5h8asdspa5l

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nprofile1qqstmv05hhyztr0y2sx8t89f3ar4l5k6nt3m7nkqwtguqrfv736tn7cpzemhxue69uhhyetvv9ujumn0wd68ytnzv9hxgyltap5

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relay.nostr.band

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npub1hkclf0wgykx7g4qvwkw2nr68tlfd4xhrha8vquk3cqxjear5h8asdspa5l

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Last Notes

2026-03-20 22:59:13 UTC

made it through
a wormhole
a portal
a persona
a pretense
a problem
a sadness
a strangeness
an idea
a habit
an expectation
and landed on the other side
where looking in the mirror
means someone else looking back
like a caterpillar that dissolves itself
down to its imaginal discs
the only thing left
is to change
heart breaking against itself
until all that remained
was the space between
everything else washed away
and i have become
myself
for the first time
again
#greymatter #poetry

2026-02-08 05:30:37 UTC

it wasn’t that she missed him
it was that she missed
who she was before him
without him
if she had never been
broken
by him
had not broken him, too
but that’s what some people do
teach you what’s not it
what love isn’t
what dysfunction is
just one form of connection
from an array
from a literal smorgasbord
of options
but still
she wondered
who she could have been
had she never met him
had she never let him
get away
with the assault
on her innocent heart
who might she have become
had he not stunted her love
used it against her
made her hate it inside of her
for being so loud and vulnerable
so open
“too much”
never enough
#poetry #greymatter

2025-11-08 02:34:42 UTC

being prepared to lose until the end
is a given
and so much can happen
around the bend
who’s to say what it will mean to win by then?
#greymatter #poetry

2025-10-04 22:21:06 UTC

as my toes touch the ground
i am pulled away by the ocean of truth
being inside the dream
means believing it’s real
every imaginary pain
twists at my heart
begging to be known
if only i had the strength
to shake free and peel back
the veil
thick with tomorrow’s mistakes
resting gently on fluttering lids
restless with regret
there was only ever this road
the one that leads to the center
this silent void
that is more than empty
heavy with hope
this is what it means
to be awake
to be aware of the impossible
illogical
pattern repeating
until it sounds like language
like someone whispering
welcome home
#poetry #greymatter

2025-09-22 01:30:18 UTC

from the perfectly broken archives:
there comes a point
in all this talking
where talk is talk
that’s all it is
words
committing suicide
kamikaze
from my lips
taking with them
held hostage
any meaning
that was left
mangled names
broken details,
landing silent
in their death
#poetry #greymatter

2025-09-15 05:25:43 UTC

as the paint dries
on every self portrait
it’s a good idea
to remember
that i can only ever illustrate
who i was
even as i am becoming
something new
#poetry #greymatter

2025-09-08 02:11:08 UTC

the peak of perfection is palpable
the sound of the silence serene
the breaking of bullshit
brings being to be
the glory of god guaranteed
the wish without worry is washing
the chaos of consciousness clean
the magic made manifest
makes me myself
the dreamer done dreaming is dreamed
#poetry #greymatter

2025-09-01 23:58:55 UTC

turned into a story
because i stopped being me
grief became glory
now i’ll always be free
#greymatter #poetry

2025-08-26 15:32:39 UTC

- reply

Same!

2025-08-25 02:13:32 UTC

seedlings become oaks
rivers carve canyons through rock
the ghost inside smiles
#haiku #poetry #greymatter #nature

2025-08-23 02:56:19 UTC

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There are already signs… 🤔

2025-08-23 02:49:53 UTC

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Yes!! 🙌

2025-08-16 23:01:06 UTC

i failed to post last week 🤨 so today i decided to do a quick ramble through my daydream machine:
some days
it’s easy
to get lost in the maze
of emails and lists
and very important
things to get done
and after a run of these
it hits me that
i’m here in the middle of
a mind-blowing
number of suns
but sure let me get all
of these tasks completed
let me check the news
and see how others are
ticking things off their lists
let me care at all
about doing this job
or that one
let me pressure myself
to be an acceptable
human
being
or perhaps i could just
relax
and let myself be
feel myself
floating
around just one
of those suns
give myself space
to get none of it done
#poetry #greymatter

2025-08-04 05:33:49 UTC

someone i’m related to was alive at every epic time in history
i have a great-great, etc.
grandmother
two actually
and a great-great, etc.
grandfather
two of those too
someone i’m related to was around when every ruler and messiah lived, and when every deity was formed in the mind of humankind
i’m the tip of the spear
the same goes for you
#poetry #greymatter

2025-07-27 20:58:24 UTC

a lopsided smile hangs
on a face obscured by ghosts
what light the darkness brings
to those who need it most
the sound of silence sings
softly on the breeze
these, the observations
of goddesses and trees
#poetry #greymatter

2025-07-20 20:16:20 UTC

when i exhale for long enough
it takes courage to call my own bluff
giving up my final tantrum
i feel my body hit the bottom
resting on the ocean floor
no need to think anymore
in slow motion, letting go
nothing to do, nowhere to go
it feels so easy to stay down where
slow motion waves animate my hair
i rest my head, my bones, my life
every hope and every strife
thoughts evaporating into timeless sand
as though this was all part of the plan
the emptiness eating every last care
until even i forget i’m there
#poetry

2025-07-13 14:36:53 UTC

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every time i look in the mirror i am a different person.
you are as well if you look closely enough.

2025-07-12 23:10:06 UTC

the reason i love hotels is
there’s nothing of me there
nothing telling me who i am
or who i have ever been
clean slate
fresh fate
#poetry #greymatter

2025-07-12 05:17:15 UTC

my mantle is lined
with souvenirs
from my spiritual journey
they remind me of where i went
what i sought
what i had hoped to find
along the way
i found my soul
and lost my mind
but this change
is the permanent kind
#poetry #greymatter

2025-02-16 18:55:21 UTC

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🤣🤣

2025-01-28 20:58:22 UTC

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Hang in 💪

2025-01-28 20:55:50 UTC

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How about avocado oil for heating/cooking?

2025-01-20 21:12:32 UTC

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@npub1xd5…9h4l 💫🙌💫

2025-01-19 22:51:08 UTC

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Welcome! What an excellent video to onboard people! 🙏

2025-01-08 22:27:46 UTC

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It’s baaaaad 😔 Power is out for me but thankfully I have a safe place to be. You can download the Watch Duty app to track the fires. Hoping they’re under control soon 🙏

2025-01-08 16:10:31 UTC

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I wanna taste that baklava! It’s one of my favorite treats 😋

2025-01-07 19:08:42 UTC

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Came here to say this 😅

2025-01-02 19:01:38 UTC

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😂

2025-01-02 16:37:54 UTC

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Could you expand on this? The bitcoin element + Nostr?