Killa Koala

Extinction wave surfer, interpreter of the meaningful outside, bollard fancier and O'Rangers fan - #OOOOOOOO. Regrets? I have approximately 493.7 regrets.

Public Key

npub1h70c74aaet579wztrdy25zvrwlyd3ryu0ck08gqr2yjtsnsfy7lq0q7ggw

NIP-05 Address

dshan_at_mastodon.au@momostr.pink

Profile Code

nprofile1qqstl8u0277u460zhp93kj92pxph0jxc3jw8ut8n5qp4zf9cfcyj00spz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduqs6amnwvaz7tmwdaejumr0ds02tmu5

Publishing to

relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub1h70c74aaet579wztrdy25zvrwlyd3ryu0ck08gqr2yjtsnsfy7lq0q7ggw

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Last Notes

2026-06-11 02:11:51 UTC

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Friend Computer: Noun.
A hardware & software based process by which humans are cloned from a chemical and biological soup, transformed into happy workers who perform labour for the betterment of Alpha Complex, and are then recycled back into the chemical and biological soup ready to make more cloned humans.

2026-05-11 22:34:22 UTC

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Troubleshooters will all raise a glass of Bouncy Bubble Beverage to our chief Kash-I-PAT-3 tonight. A glass is all he left us unfortunately. 😞

2026-04-26 23:27:44 UTC

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That's yesterday and today taken care of, but something's gonna happen tomorrow I bet. (It always does when the knee I lost in the First Mutant War starts acting up, and right now it's acting real crazieee.)

2026-04-25 02:18:58 UTC

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FENN NEWSFLASH: We are receiving reports of explosions and a fire near the RFD sector Food Vats.
We're trying to confirm these reports at the moment, but while you wait for the next FENN NEWSFLASH UPDATE why not crack open a nice cold can of Bouncy Bubble Beverage? BBB puts a bounce in your day!

2026-03-23 21:08:14 UTC

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War is peace & Computer is our friend.

2026-03-21 02:01:47 UTC

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The reduction of skinny dippers in the food vats means that AlphaSlop #1 (bland flavour) will be less spicy. However, the fix for the water supply issue means citizens can add extra water to their AlphaSlop without the risk of projectile vomiting or bursting into flames.

2026-03-14 21:47:25 UTC

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Dear Friend Computer, relax dude. I've got this. I know a guy who knows a guy who can supply breeding stock of some South American toads that'll clean up that even bigger monster PDQ. At a very reasonable cost too!
They're a bit on the ugly side, but hey, they work for free!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cane_toads_in_Australia

2026-03-13 22:51:26 UTC

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Dear Friend computer, this Troubleshooter recently submitted Form J/826.34 to request transfer to Team 4532.1/C as I'm finding Team 4532.2/B is not appropriate for my skillset or stress level.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.

2026-03-08 21:29:31 UTC

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As a citizen living near IRN Sector can I request that the Wonderful and Heroic Armed Forces of our Beloved Alpha Complex please conduct their preemptive retaliatory de-escalation operations more quietly? Between the explosions and the screaming I cannot get a good night's sleep and have started falling asleep at work, which is embarrassing.
Thank you for your attention to this matter.

2026-03-07 22:43:54 UTC

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You can't fool me Friend Computer, it's ALPHA, in'it?

2026-03-03 23:58:51 UTC

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Liking is for wimps, mutants, commies and traitors. This citizen *loved* your message.

2026-03-02 22:29:11 UTC

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Friend Computer, have you considered setting up some sort of organisation to promote your commitment to peace through peaceful death?
I know, you could call it Friend Computer's Bored of Peace.

2026-02-27 02:51:13 UTC

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If missing a dietary opportunity has left you with a motivational sensation you need to satisfy join us at Data Centre 163 W at midnight tonight for an unplanned pyrotechnic celebration.

2026-02-10 23:01:08 UTC

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Friend Computer, can a citizen get some illumination in sector B-47G? The lights have been out for two weeks now and maintenance couldn't light their own arses on fire.

2026-01-10 21:42:48 UTC

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Everyone knows that the cost of living can be a problem, even in Alpha Complex — the greatest place on earth. Renting your spare bedroom or storeroom to Recycling Services to use for "temporary" overflow storage can help pay those unexpected bills.

2026-01-05 21:31:49 UTC

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Everything may be fine but something isn't. Somethings are the problem, kill them all!

2025-12-15 21:37:12 UTC

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The price of clones is down whilst the price of Bouncy Bubble Beverage is up over last year. More demand for the beverage due to the increased supply of its consumers means increasing prices. Nothing to see here, just markets being markets.
However, given that so many clones are secret mutants and communists, anything loyal citizens might do to reduce the population of undeserving Bouncy Bubble Beverage consumers can only help reduce prices for this vital drink. Just sayin' ...

2025-12-13 23:13:25 UTC

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I always wish IS a good morning when I wake up in the morning. Their presents are crap however.

2025-12-11 01:15:53 UTC

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'Twas the night before Friendmas, when all through the Complex not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse-rat; the limb tubes were hung by the recyclers with care, in hopes that Friend Computer would soon be there.
The clones were nestled all snug in their sleep pods, while visions of Bouncy Bubble Beverage danced in their heads; and then Troubleshooter Dan and and his dastardly crew, burst through the door with their lasers ablaze, screaming "Death to all mutants, and commies as well!"
When everyone inside had gone to their maker, and the fires they'd started were burning quite well, Dan sprang to his Tesla, to his team gave a whistle, and away they all flew like shells from a gun. But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight, HAPPY FRIENDMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD-NIGHT!

2025-09-25 21:54:03 UTC

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Making it dual boot seems the most likely way of avoiding such issues.

2025-06-28 10:52:33 UTC

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People in Australia have a housing crisis, crocs in Australia have a housing crisis. So, let's build enough affordable housing for one of these groups and then have them share it with the other group. Soon we'll have enough housing, for the survivors. (The Liberal Party needs a new housing policy and this one ticks all their boxes.)

2025-04-07 20:11:54 UTC

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Exactly, not nearly enough people have pointed out that Smoot Hawley did way worse than just "deepen the Great Depression", it was a significant factor in the rise of Hitler in Germany and imperial Japan.
It's only a matter of time (weeks, months?) before Trump starts proclaiming "red lines", much like his buddy Putin over Ukraine, threatening to nuke nations if they don't lift tariffs, unblock critical mineral shipments, etc.
If the moribund US Congress and Supreme Court don't step in and stop him real soon now this shitshow is going to get much, much worse and we're going to staring down the barrel of nuclear annihilation.

2024-12-04 03:47:46 UTC

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On the plus side they're full of toxic new chemicals they didn't have when you were young Jenny.

2024-11-07 18:34:32 UTC

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You know, I'm not convinced that worm in his brain is actually dead.

2024-10-22 20:53:06 UTC

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Everyone who encounters Rudy in public should immediately ask him what time it is.