helplessduck

Control issues and perfectionism are among my many neuroses. Twitter Diaspora. I swear a lot. I do drugs (the good kind). I'm a socialist. I studied art in school. Beyond that: US Politics, environmental conservation, mental health, organic gardening, and my employer Ramses, That Damn Cat. Sometimes I have really shitty takes.
He/Him/Michael/Arrogant jackass.

Header Image: Black Bar
Avatar: Ridiculous DALL E generated artificial duck. Full #AltText description on pinned post.

Public Key

npub17antjudtaemvg4uvvtqftptg7vl08wwa32t3pecs4lp8pryqgxzq4up37h

NIP-05 Address

helplessduck_at_mastodon.online@mostr.pub

Profile Code

nprofile1qqs0we4ewx47uaky27xx9sy4s450x0hnh8wc49csuug2lsns3jqyrpqpz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduqs6amnwvaz7tmwdaejumr0dsj993nl

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relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub17antjudtaemvg4uvvtqftptg7vl08wwa32t3pecs4lp8pryqgxzq4up37h

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Last Notes

2024-08-02 13:03:24

I think I'll go to the Capital this weekend.

2024-07-23 14:57:54

As destructively tense as the last four months have been, there's a little part of me that is kinda delighted by the slim possibility this was an intentional bait and switch; the Dems planned to nominate Harris all along. Maybe the debate moved that time table up? I dunno. It would be a pretty clever trick, though. It would also be pretty cool if this was all King President Joe Dark Brandon Biden's idea, an eloquent last minute 'fuck you' to all the clowns.
#USPol #Biden #Harris

2024-07-17 12:04:51

Hmmm... a trip into the city to one or the government offices might make my five person a day limit difficult.

2024-07-15 22:18:31

Two hours until bed time.
All I've learned today is that I probably should be using Proxmox to do everything, it's not going to take much effort to only interact with five or fewer people per day, and retail therapy has stopped working.

2024-07-14 20:26:52

Are there any disadvantages to running Home Assistant in Docker as opposed to the OS on a Raspberry Pi? I'm thinking along the lines of how Nextcloud in Docker has some limits to functionality. I'd like to use the Pi for a dashboard in the kitchen, if I can, the server is more than capable of serving more than just NextCloud.
#HomeAssistant #HomeAutomation #Docker #Linux

2024-07-02 02:10:49

I'm sorry. If the president can get away with whatever the fuck ever they want, why are we even having this discussion? Revoke the citizenship of everyone who voted for dippy and deport them to Hungary. Easy fix.
#USPol #SCOTUS

2024-06-25 16:37:41

I'm not really sure what to make of this.
What is even happening here?
https://www.wral.com/story/man-charged-with-stealing-7-mobile-homes-in-hoke-county/21497776/
#NC #NorthCarolina #Housing

2024-05-28 15:46:08

Leaving awkward voicemails at nurses stations at my GI's office.
That's my style.
*snaps suspenders*

2024-05-19 23:57:56

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Huh.
I can't use Balena Etcher to burn the ISO to the USB drive and have to use a different tool for this. Balena itself said so. I assume because it needs some kind of specific MBR or some such? No clue.
I sure do love how effortless Zombie Bill Gates has made this whole process. *chef's kiss*
I'm going to walk across the street and do some drugs about it while WoeUSB-ng does does it's woe unto the USB.
#Windows10
5/n 🧵

2024-05-19 21:52:19

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No idea what that was all about.
It's downloading. At 4.6 mbps.
The machine in question isn't compatible with 11. Unclear what chicanery was involved with Intel, but the processors in these HP Elite Desks I've got doesn't do something 11 just can't live without? Whatever. Is Zombie Bill Gates is punishing us for using Windows 10 with this heinous downstream speed?
#Windows10
4/n 🧵

2024-05-19 21:18:04

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The page on the Microsoft website has stopped loading altogether. Even in Edge.
:blobcatknife:
Hmmmmm.....
#Windows10
3/n 🧵

2024-05-07 12:12:38

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@npub1cel…pmxm
Were the baulsters *cut* to extract the stair railing?!

2024-04-30 23:21:24

EEP! A spider!
#BloomScrolling #Gardening #Flowers #Photography
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/112/362/722/152/948/995/original/7993b8dd5a0e7ac5.jpeg

2024-04-09 11:45:07

I think the most annoying part of group therapy is that I can't help but become somewhat emotionally invested in these people. It's frightening that I'm the most stable among the cohort, but these folks are essentially emotional dumpster-fires. It's draining as hell, in quite the opposite way therapy should be draining.

2024-04-05 19:47:41

Classwork: done.
Errands: complete.
Bathroom: cleaned.
Three garden beds: cleared out. Tomorrow: landscape fabric.
Laundry: started.
Dinner: prepped.
Houseplants: watered.
Shower: taken.
Cat: dandled.
Ass: planted in this chair for the next hour, at least.

2024-03-24 08:44:41

It's not called a nap if it starts before dawn.

2024-03-12 16:07:02

If you freeze hummus, it changes the texture ever so slightly making it fluffy?
IF YOU FREEZE HUMMUS, IT CHANGES THE TEXTURE EVER SO SLIGHTLY MAKING IT FLUFFY LIKE LITTLE GARBANZO CLOUDS!

2024-03-12 14:23:27

That was good therapy.

2024-03-12 12:35:53

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@npub174z…6y0t
Days like that ssssssuuuuuuccccckkkk.
Lately they seem far too frequent.
You got this, though!!!
Best wishes from a stranger on the internet. :BlobhajfBlobbyHug:

2024-03-12 11:32:04

Teehee!!!!
This is one of those times I regret that we don't have quote-posting on Masto.
It's a celebration!
h/t @npub1hzt…llcv
#AndrewTate #BelieveWomen
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/112/082/493/252/556/597/original/0568616e0860053b.png

2024-03-12 11:26:34

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@npub1583…3xdp
My therapist says I need to work on being less melodramatic so I've reduced wailing by approximately fifty percent and sobbing is now by appointment only.

2024-03-12 11:11:25

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@npub1583…3xdp
My back and neck are all messed up. Have been for a few weeks.

2024-03-12 11:01:13

Well, I am certainly awake now.
I just rescued a cat from the back yard. Taejo had it pinned in one of the corners of the back yard with no where to go because the dogs on the other side of the fence were right there. I don't know what Taejo would have done. He certainly had the opportunity.
It was a very sweet cat. Let me pick it up and carry it to safety. Very soft. And very grateful, too. Tried to follow me inside. 😕

2024-03-12 10:00:59

Owwww.

2024-03-12 10:00:51

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@npub1m2c…rag2
Wait. What?! 😡

2024-02-18 14:29:14

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@npub1d56…t94y
As far as I know, the USA is seeking his extradition on rape charges as well as the leaks. I could be wrong because I try not to pay much attention to him.

2024-02-18 14:24:53

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@npub1cr6…9g7p
😊

2024-02-18 13:57:13

#SilentSunday #Orchid #BloomScrolling
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/111/952/826/139/964/819/original/d90e681a8ed9f551.jpeg

2024-02-08 21:28:58

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@npub1ckg…xfnn
RIGHT?! Like... all you have to do is walk ~slightly~ faster than a normal person walks, and avoid crowds.
I already do these things.
Slow zombies are almost completely unbelievable, and we were already dealing with a lot of suspension of disbelief, here.

2024-02-08 21:22:50

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@npub1ckg…xfnn
That is exactly the kind of zombie I had in mind.

2024-02-08 21:09:12

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But, for posterity, I would like to clarify that if it's the literal apocalypse, say, zombie or nuclear, I'm just going to walk out my front door and face the music.
If they're zombies, I hope they're fast zombies. I would be totally okay with being a fast zombie.

2024-02-08 21:06:34

I absolutely love the discussions I get to have on here.
I've lost track of whether we were talking about the literal apocalypse or the political apocalypse, but then quickly realized there really is not much of a difference.
I think that's yet ANOTHER #TIL moment.

2024-02-02 16:29:11

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@npub1v2s…mqq5
I leave to go to the vape store, and now there's a war on?
I was gone for like... thirty minutes.
I'm sore as hell from my car wreck, but still so livid over it, I'll mount my trusty steed and ride into battle, painted in woad with two swords drawn.
What the hell did I miss?

2023-12-31 17:58:28

I am so fucking stoned right now.

2023-12-16 22:25:19

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@npub1aef…slwx
My focus is on MH providers who devote 60% or more of their client load to PTSD issues (specifically military-service related) LGBT, and the elderly. It's a big pond, here.
Credentialing, Contract Negotiation, and Compliance is mine. I also do project management and technical writing for MH practices. No certifications besides MA, but I'm an admin whiz.
What's your specialty?

2023-10-15 16:57:03

I need to go to Fresh Market or Sprouts sometime and pick up some high-test milk to try this yogurt setting on the Instant Pot.
I have so many questions. Can I really make six quarts of yogurt? What on earth would I do with six quarts of yogurt?

2023-10-11 23:18:18

It is impossible to concentrate on these online courses with all this noise.
I've been saying this for months, but demurring in the name of being a good neighbor.
I'm fuckin' fed up.
I'm suing my neighbors.
When I am through with them they will be legally barred from owning so much as a gold fish. Goodbye chickens. Goodbye turkeys. Goodbye pigs. Goodbye cats. Goodbye dogs. While I'm at it, goodbye illegal structures and unapproved fence connection, building on my fuckin' land and the drumset.

2023-10-09 18:54:25

If I have to walk more than six feet to waffles, you're doing it wrong.

2023-10-08 10:40:09

Good morning to the gang at @npub1jhf…r9xm.

2023-09-27 22:59:24

The funny part is that my office is literally fourteen steps from my bed (assuming I don't fall) and even that is too much work, sometimes.
Dancing Queen my narrow, lilly-white ass...

2023-09-15 14:24:38

They haven’t cleaned the new apartment. 🤦🏼‍♂️

2023-09-10 21:56:38

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@npub12kw…8vax
Who screams?

2023-09-10 21:48:12

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@npub12da…57vl
For instance, this hella beat up ringer celebrating Italy. The rings are frayed and split. The screen print of "Italia" and the Italian Flag is faded from being put in a dryer for years and years...

2023-09-10 21:37:00

Fun story. Everyone thinks these shirts are valuable or important or something.
The world is literally overrun with rubes.

2023-09-10 21:15:52

(It's better than the other kinds of screaming.)

2023-09-10 21:15:21

*abject screaming*

2023-09-10 21:02:35

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@npub1h32…tp83
Honestly, I think she needs something that cuffs a little higher on the wrist.
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/111/042/852/568/294/775/original/700c7cd78efe08b9.jpeg

2023-09-10 19:43:15

Here's the thing:
If That Damn Cat ™️ interrupts a conference call, and it bothers you, you're limited to only a handful of options.
1) Buy that little bitch her own damn house. I won't stop you.
2) Get over it.
3) Fire me.
4) Compliment Ramses on her sporting choice of gloves and thank her for the valuable input she has provided.

2023-09-10 15:30:23

If I never have to read about "veepstakes" again for the rest of my life, I think I'll be able to die happy.
#USPol

2023-09-10 07:32:06

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@npub1ts0…meng
Oh, that's only one of the most disgusting parts of the iceberg...

2023-09-10 06:56:29

It's not exactly glamorous, but I'm still standing by my assertion that if you come at me without a mask on, and I live in a "stand your ground" state, I have every right to end you in the produce aisle for putting me and everyone I come into contact with thereafter at immediate risk of debilitation or death.
*Karen Walker voice*
Isn't it fun how that works both ways?
#Covid

2023-09-06 21:15:49

A dock collapsed at Story Island!
Ten people were injured.

2023-09-06 21:14:03

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@npub1a4l…fyse
And isn't 20 grand a little excessive for a fence?
I get that it's a mile long, but isn't it just posts and pulling wire?

2023-09-06 21:12:38

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@npub1a4l…fyse
Since you refuse to admit fault, the cows have retained me as general counsel. I can no longer comment outside of the statement they've released: "We'll see you at the effing Hague." (Cows, apparently, do not swear?)
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/111/020/245/590/161/616/original/412ec063369937fc.jpg

2023-09-05 15:34:26

A masked future is actually better for me. I can hide my constant, resting sneer. Throw in a hat and giant sunglasses and those morons at the market wont even know how hard I'm judging them for breathing near my produce.

2023-09-05 12:18:13

Mom says thanks, everyone.

2023-09-01 07:42:03

It sounded like a dump truck driving over a thousand sheets of bubble wrap, but it felt so good.

2023-09-01 05:17:22

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@npub1wgh…0xff
This is brilliant.
I want to do this to Walmart here in the US.

2023-09-01 05:10:57

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@npub1qra…kfgn
Yet the tuxedo stays in perfect place. Magic.

2023-09-01 05:08:27

To gather a sword without knowing the enemy is a path to failure.

2023-09-01 04:44:21

It hasn't even begun and I already hate it.

2023-09-01 04:30:56

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@npub1dq0…glnl
The hell?
Was gravity otherwise engaged?

2023-09-01 04:25:49

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@npub1ynz…xffl
Bidges of Madison County.
Oh, God... I'll never be able to use another over-water passage again without cackling like a fool.

2023-09-01 03:52:53

2.5" of rain today.

2023-09-01 03:50:48

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@npub13ru…67kn
Not a fan of green caps (taste bitter to me?) but, HOLY CHONK!
Nice!!!

2023-09-01 03:43:18

If you don't say "WELL WELL WELL" in the style of Beverly Leslie every time your cat saunters into the room lookin' like she just left a traphouse, what are you even doing with your life?

2023-08-31 15:33:52

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@npub1jzl…wlth
I saw that in the NYT. My eyes rolled so far away I had to hire someone to go get them.
I disagree that they can't be entry level positions. If a person has their ear to the ground for the community they would like to represent, I say good on them and go for it. it's the choice of their constituents. It's a bit of an originalist interpretation of the role, but I truly think anyone should be able to do it so long as their closet isn't bursting with skeletons.

2023-08-31 15:15:37

Y'all know that's just The Damn Cat ™️ jammin' out to The Killers in her sitting room, right?

2023-08-31 15:14:29

*distant screaming*

2023-08-31 15:11:42

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@npub1jzl…wlth
I can't stand the "Eat the rich" meme.
We are, though, singing right along, here to a point. The age thing. I don't think anyone should be judged on that. I'm neatly forty (that's like 600 in gay years, if you're unfamiliar with the math). That doesn't change the fact that I'm tired of having people in charge who have been in charge since before my parents even met. I could be wrong, but I wouldn't call that ageist. I'd call it anti-dynastic.

2023-08-31 14:48:46

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@npub1kk5…e0ds
You put this way better than I did. That man is a monster, no doubt. But to attack for a cognitive issue runs right over the line of hypocrisy, to my way of thinking. He chose to be a white supremacist, chose to strip social safety nets out from under our feet, &c. My money says he didn't choose to have a brain injury. There are so many easier things to go after him for. It's sad that this is what gets people wound up. Gross, even.
SIGH

2023-08-31 14:28:08

I should be outside twirling around in the gardens like a nun on meth because it's so gorgeous. But there's still a lot of really annoying pain. Zero energy.

2023-08-31 14:24:35

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@npub13en…5fxe
Not when you say it like that...

2023-08-31 14:15:36

I spend more time making sure That Damn Cat ™️ looks nice for video calls than I spend on myself.
I can look a rake, but I don't want a client to see Ramses without her glow on.

2023-08-31 13:46:30

Uh oh.
Evangelistas in walmart brand oxfords and clip-on ties. Roamin' the hood.
$7 gets you $12 that they wind up running back to the car they parked ON MY LAND in less than 45 minutes because they knocked on Rex's front door and he started shooting out of one his back windows.

2023-08-31 13:31:40

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@npub16pd…hum9
I'll give you that. You're not wrong. It has been nagging at the back of my mind. Original meangirl here (*snaps suspenders*) would love to make fun of dippy because he's fat and illiterate. Elise Sefanik is the very definition of low-hanging.
There's a difference between not taking the high road and sinking to their level, though. I'm not sure what that is, but I know hurling ableist insults and bathing in schadenfreude isn't it.

2023-08-31 13:15:07

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@npub16pd…hum9
When it's the right going after Dianne Feinstein or John Fetterman do you accept that as justification for mocking a person for their disability?
I'm not defending the man's policy decisions or platforms. I fuckin' hate him. The people that vote for him likely hold some very reprehensible values, themselves. There's plenty of fodder there. Why swing for the low-hanging fruit?

2023-08-31 13:06:55

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@npub1sf5…42ct
Sale refused! Do what you want with it, don't tell me about it.
I guess I'm a snob?
I gasped so hard I could hear the windows flex from the pressure change. 😂
You have a point, though. Cropping an abstract isn't categorically a sin, I guess. I just don't like excluding any part of the artists intention from a work. Feels to me like taking a quote out of context.

2023-08-31 12:44:15

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@npub1jzl…wlth
Because that's totally going to help the left defend the right's attacks on Biden's age, right?
SIGH

2023-08-31 12:23:52

Mitch McConnell clearly has a TBI. As much as I want that miserable piece of shit taken down, this isn't the way I had hoped. Frankly, it makes me a little sick to see people relishing in the mans disabling injury.
Grow up.
#USPol #McConnell #GOP

2023-08-31 12:12:18

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@npub1xau…pfnu
And now the great pronunciation war can begin.
Like gif/gif.
fib-get or fib-jet....

2023-08-31 12:09:30

I can hear it now at the council meeting.
"Whaaaa! But it's almost 200 years old!"
Fact. But y'all approved building a damn gas station eighty feet from it. What the hell did you think would happen to it. It's dying.

2023-08-31 12:04:25

They need to just fell that tree.
It's gonna come down on it's own one day and kill somebody's kid.

2023-08-31 12:01:10

I just drove through the village and aside from another giant branch coming down out of The Old Tree, it appears that our little hamlet has managed to escape unscathed.

2023-08-31 11:24:17

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@npub1jhf…r9xm
Y'all even lose power?

2023-08-31 11:18:14

I woke up with this stuck in my head, so here.
You have it too.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zx5tSmOY_iM

2023-08-31 00:25:32

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@npub1k7q…3lrw
DEVIL BIRD!

2023-08-30 23:36:47

I explained that it wouldn't be fair.
Now I must wait.

2023-08-30 19:13:52

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@npub1sf5…42ct
Oh My! I was thinking half that size before the matting and frame. One of my friends from school got really into framing and he bought all that stuff. He's good at it, too. I'll check out the square collection.
It's weird doing this in my own house. In the past I've been in a gallery with things I ~have~ to pick from, instead of searching for things I actually want to look at.

2023-08-30 18:42:13

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@npub1sf5…42ct
Aww, thanks! I don't want to take up your time... but, I was thinking something square (should make it easier to enlarge?).
I want it to be big. The vault on the ceiling makes it impossible for anything to look level, so I need a big, heavy thing to counteract the pitch of the ceiling. If that makes sense?
Impressionist stuff, especially is popular around here. I have a couple of small architectural elevations to put up. That's all I got so far.
Thanks so much!!

2023-08-30 16:00:58

I really kinda don't want to, though.

2023-08-30 15:53:27

Back to studying.

2023-08-30 14:38:24

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@npub1jhf…r9xm
They were joint when it was Pope, though. Now it's just an airfield, not two separate bases. I dunno...
I'm a little concerned for my friends on the Outer Banks, but not so much for here.
Never not once around here in my life have I heard the name Parker. 😂
https://files.mastodon.online/media_attachments/files/110/979/069/687/234/876/original/a4dbd8b3e903d6f7.jpeg

2023-08-30 13:43:57

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@npub1jhf…r9xm
As long as it doesn't hail or spin off any tornadoes, I can deal with the thunderstorms.
Whatchu know about some Puppy Creek?! I used to go to that fire station to early vote. 😂
I don't know what they're calling Pope after the name change from Bragg. When they decommissioned the AFB, they changed the name to Ft. Bragg Army Airfield. I guess it's Ft. Liberty AAF now?

2023-08-30 12:17:58

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@npub1jhf…r9xm
I'm really not looking forward to the wind and the ground here is already soaked. I'm further south than you (I think) in the NC Sandhills.

2023-08-22 01:16:40

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@npub175m…x8qs
It's just one more bit of emotional labor we do for you people. 😂
I want to say because I wouldn't say "I am he." At least In modern English, anyway. Except I would absolutely say something like that in causal conversation. I have never thought about this. It's gonna drive me nuts.

2023-08-21 04:11:39

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@npub12sx…r4z3
Smore's ... dip? You say?
*Furiously DuckDuckGoing*

2023-08-06 01:43:41

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@npub1vyt…mgjn
I have bread dough fermenting in the fridge right just now and panzanella was already on the list for using it up. So delicious. Great minds. ☺️
Nice sear on that chop, too!

2023-08-04 23:32:44

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@npub1z00…zz79 @npub1ynn…njqd
I am super OCD about my knives. I don't even use them to scoop stuff off the board because there is a small amount of anecdotal evidence that it could potentially be bad for the blades. Maybe. 😂

2023-08-04 23:25:54

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@npub1z00…zz79 @npub1ynn…njqd
*hyperventilating into paper bag*