SwiftOnSecurity

https://infosec.exchange/@SwiftOnSecurity

Official: https://twitter.com/swiftonsecurity/status/1588670921489125377
Bio:
computer security person at a place. former helpdesk. they/them/tay

Twitter: https://twitter.com/swiftonsecurity/status/1588670921489125377

Public Key

npub1tx8qa9j24vyteazcgpcmkr4tckyw6wd63yusvew9em02swnfkf3qdrx0yc

NIP-05 Address

swiftonsecurity_at_infosec.exchange@momostr.pink

Profile Code

nprofile1qqs9nrswje92kz9u73vyqudmp64utz8d8xagjwgxvhzuah4g8f5mycspz3mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerpd46hxtnfduqs6amnwvaz7tmwdaejumr0ds6tf3kr

Publishing to

relay.damus.io

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub1tx8qa9j24vyteazcgpcmkr4tckyw6wd63yusvew9em02swnfkf3qdrx0yc

Show more details

Last Notes

2026-08-02 17:46:50 UTC

VPNs can't hide you from God

2026-07-05 14:08:42 UTC

Happy 10 year anniversary to the Microsoft bae intern email. 🥳
HELL YES TO GETTING LIT ON A MONDAY NIGHT WITH HELLA NOMS AND YAMMER BEER PONG TABLES
Yes, I set a reminder for this.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/867/761/326/307/519/original/5d8454129e563cd4.jpeg

2026-07-02 16:48:59 UTC

I admire IT people 20 years in who still run home labs. It's like coming home from the egg salad sandwich factory, hearing, "what do you want for dinner, honey?" And saying, "same thing we have every night: egg salad sandwiches."

2026-06-28 23:32:59 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/830/344/035/144/953/original/6ac7cdebe3b9f0ad.jpeg

2026-06-27 20:20:27 UTC

Dear lord this is the most exhausting PS2 game I've ever installed.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/823/924/700/246/343/original/af893830254c3b24.jpeg

2026-06-09 13:53:34 UTC

Incredible new creature they found at the bottom of Challenger Deep. Seems to live around hot shafts.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/720/481/764/155/833/original/fd785b540952b55c.jpeg

2026-05-17 17:45:36 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/591/161/048/840/812/original/f9f0417fbf7c36aa.png

2026-05-11 16:47:39 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/556/959/332/068/176/original/9994fe09fea51ea4.jpeg

2026-05-11 14:48:53 UTC

1.) Wake up
2.) Watch my Instagram reels, which are 100% OnlyFans sales pipelines
3.) Watch my TikTok feed, which are 100% OnlyFans sales pipelines
4.) Browse my Bluesky feed, which are 100% gay thirst traps "any1 DFW?"
5.) Browse my cousins' Facebook posts, which are 100% OnlyFans sales pipelines

2026-03-27 21:47:47 UTC

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The full story of sysmon-config, the first (to my awareness) open source HIDS monitoring solution I've neglected but others have picked up the mantle, is sonething I would like to tell.
It was in fact not generated for a security job, strictly. I needed to understand the sensitive modifications being made to our Windows systems as Helpdesk. And I did not want to filter Procmon again.
It turns out the sensitive modifications that screw things up kind of include the malware. ones.

2026-03-27 21:17:03 UTC

Fun fact I made a typo in sysmon-config many years ago, when I was working in Helpdesk.
I got my shot and was hired to the big firm with the big fancy expensive tools I would've never dreamed of.
Do you know what I find in that tool, auditing it?
My typo. They pasted it in. They just... copied the whole thing.
I sit at my desk. And I realize I was always enough.

2026-03-20 15:22:32 UTC

You let freedom ring to voicemail?
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/262/184/514/498/099/original/427c84c4a748992b.jpeg

2026-03-17 18:06:53 UTC

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Rarity knows what she wants

2026-03-17 15:55:58 UTC

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absolutely there is but still you know you will be held accountable to this

2026-03-17 15:39:21 UTC

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Ultimate pucker factor when it starts hitting tens of thousands, then you go back and rethink this deployment strategy a bit.

2026-03-17 15:35:59 UTC

We have this system at work where you have to manually read and type out the estimated number of impacted systems before it lets you issue a command.

2026-03-15 21:18:38 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/235/273/142/229/715/original/5b543885dbcdc268.jpeg

2026-03-14 20:39:09 UTC

Remembering the good times
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/229/455/558/668/567/original/c5201b878738d396.jpeg

2026-03-14 14:18:22 UTC

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2026-03-14 02:26:54 UTC

Got an AI-written reply from a vendor we pay tens of millions of dollars a year to, and it doesn't feel good.
Three people spent enormous
deliberative effort for a whole day in very expensive company time to make every word of that.
You put it in an answer shredder and spit it at me with some editing.
Feels bad.

2026-03-12 19:02:14 UTC

RE: https://infosec.exchange/@SecureOwl/116217660777825475
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/217/749/742/707/236/original/61a1bcd3636fd27f.jpeg
#note12r2…whqs

2026-03-12 17:30:58 UTC

Uncropped original SwiftOnSecurity, 2014
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/217/390/977/745/294/original/ed58616d4430ee59.jpeg

2026-03-12 14:43:38 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/216/732/993/294/743/original/bdda76aae266df43.mp4

2026-03-12 14:32:00 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/216/687/286/321/666/original/1cf2d673913ac6d3.jpeg

2026-03-12 03:37:53 UTC

Microsoft advertising Windows 98
#MillennialSnapshots
Maxim, November 1998
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/214/115/134/950/002/original/6accfca7808af06d.jpeg

2026-03-10 18:19:14 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/206/256/173/440/766/original/ae5852542d0a86d5.jpeg

2026-03-07 20:11:05 UTC

Feels like there used to be a lot more fiction storylines about old explosives that degraded and would detonate if you jostled them

2026-03-06 15:03:23 UTC

This is what junior security people think a USB charger at the airport is
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/182/836/871/713/381/original/110a6019aefc4d02.jpeg

2026-03-06 03:38:55 UTC

Funny enough, my most positive professional experiences as a class are with General Counsel.
Seems like the kinda job you just smoke a cigarette and rub your eyes saying "oh my God not this shit again" and, "please repeat what you said they did," all day – forever.

2026-03-04 20:39:42 UTC

One of best aspects of my firm is a Teams chat run by our incident management department, with about 700 key techs across enterprise receive updates on problems and issues trending that way. Anyone can raise flag about something weird, if confirmed gets split out. Just discretion. Not intended for management consumption, that's handled by incident department.

2026-03-01 02:27:23 UTC

They really convinced Americans we'd have to defend Burger Town on our own soil

2026-02-28 21:28:29 UTC

RE: https://mastodon.social/@the_other_jon/116150350564963722
Dr. Horrible: “Conflict Diamond told me you were doubling with Bait ‘n’ Switch”
Moist: “Yeah…”
Dr. Horrible: “Yeah…?”
Moist: “It was alright. I kind of thought I was supposed to end up with Bait…”
#note1ml4…3z0d

2026-02-28 21:19:21 UTC

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Too much bait

2026-02-28 21:02:41 UTC

BUILD👏 HIGHWAYS👏 NOT👏 BOMBS👏

2026-02-28 16:20:10 UTC

Me n' the homies, monitoring the situation(s).
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/149/164/875/694/825/original/441d95048c8e16d5.mp4

2026-02-28 04:28:29 UTC

Me taking a load on my back
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/146/366/420/946/283/original/d1859a2bb181c2ad.jpeg

2026-02-26 20:21:50 UTC

People are getting DESPERATE for memory
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/138/790/545/055/041/original/6bbc72fa2ac748c6.jpeg

2026-02-24 06:03:09 UTC

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deep cut

2026-02-24 05:59:48 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/124/076/310/658/263/original/d9928de70b1ff39b.jpeg

2026-02-22 19:54:09 UTC

I pick movies largely based on what's starting when I decide to be there. Ended up being "How To Make A Killing."
DELICIOUS. No idea it was an A24. I didn't think it would pull through for a bit but dang it delivers. Not what I thought from the ads some humor but DARK. Recommended. A real treat from a writer-director and you can absolutely tell.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/116/032/188/162/878/original/077f65dd1e0f880f.jpeg
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/116/032/437/977/532/original/94780351af087c84.jpeg

2026-02-22 17:38:01 UTC

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holy shit!!!!! 😀😀😀😀😀😀

2026-02-22 17:30:30 UTC

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alcohol messes with REM sleep

2026-02-22 17:23:38 UTC

What people don't understand is it never used to be this bad. Even the tunnels under the Internet used to be well-kept by their inhabitants. Radscorpions were trained by diligent owners and didn't need leashes. There was a sense of community.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/115/440/588/976/776/original/6845c7aed8a4d48f.jpeg

2026-02-21 22:52:30 UTC

https://youtu.be/xMrN3Rh55uM
Level up, feel the bliss
Forward slash, almost kiss!
Game On!
Invite Sent! (Game On!)
Hop on Vent! (Game On!)
Say it proud! (Game On!)
Screw the crowd! (Game On!)
No one else to please. (Game On!)
I'll press your hot keys! (Game On!)

2026-02-21 03:39:47 UTC

To sleep I lace a sausage with Benadryl and throw it to my neighbor's dog, put in earplugs, put on a nasal mask to a CPAP breathing machine, put on noise-cancelling headphones, get under a 25lb weighted blanket, and imagine I'm in an orbiting one-person escape pod under comms blackout waiting for rescue.

2026-02-19 06:25:34 UTC

- reply

gone :(

2026-02-19 06:25:23 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/095/865/309/648/095/original/dcaea1395299953a.mp4

2026-02-09 05:33:48 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/039/039/358/615/987/original/52a85ac00cc79d4b.png

2026-02-07 15:04:21 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/116/029/958/267/249/177/original/3e7d9edfafad8a9f.jpeg

2026-02-03 18:10:41 UTC

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Weird I never got it to work before. Let me try

2026-02-03 17:11:28 UTC

On Unix, every user is a phile

2026-02-02 22:00:21 UTC

@npub17ap…e0h4 is there any hack way in Windows firewall to apply outbound restriction to a program without enabling it for everything? Other than the IPsec/AppLocker program group trick?

2026-02-01 23:37:44 UTC

NYT: Billionaire Faux Pas? Jeffrey Epstein Fails To Give Land Acknowledgement to Indigenous Inhabitants of Pedophile Island

2026-02-01 18:43:40 UTC

Buying CPU because I can't afford RAM
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/996/846/800/277/844/original/05025dd900b8cf1f.jpeg

2026-02-01 16:30:56 UTC

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Sorry I dont keep track of it in quite that way. I dont think corn is something youd want to grow

2026-02-01 16:29:43 UTC

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just emails and passwords and my camera roll

2026-02-01 16:23:45 UTC

I have isolated most of my private life and media from my Windows desktops. That all resides in the Apple ecosystem including a separate Mac terminal I keep on my desk.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/996/296/343/684/777/original/ab7c86dc57e2a162.jpeg
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/996/296/634/323/671/original/f01d9cbfde38caa0.jpeg

2026-01-11 18:08:03 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/877/798/215/455/405/original/a6f3e921282c330b.jpeg

2026-01-11 17:09:24 UTC

Working in IT used to mean a solidly upwardly-mobile career now I can't even saturate my goonbox PCI-E lanes or fill my DIMM sockets

2026-01-11 16:33:33 UTC

Holy crap I'm cited in a 2023 academic law paper... about a pull request on GitHub for a security fix I have neglected to integrate for five years LOL.
https://ir.lawnet.fordham.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=2353&context=faculty_scholarship
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/877/426/516/581/528/original/f3f34e11f7bdf1bb.jpeg

2026-01-10 05:01:35 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/869/043/405/505/026/original/22cef3a22ed4f2f2.jpeg

2026-01-10 00:30:18 UTC

https://x.com/kairo_anatomika/status/2009439905437634973
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/867/976/688/525/935/original/dd6300588bce9b34.jpeg

2026-01-08 17:09:10 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/860/579/722/342/459/original/e57f0d5d5490230e.jpeg

2026-01-08 04:41:33 UTC

Use CarPlay/AndroidAuto and FAST-CHARGE phone at same time. Compatible with USB-C phones. Just connect your CarPlay USB port, phone, and a USB-C charger.
Injects USB-C PD power into a CarPlay signal from USB-A (separate USB-C version available)
https://www.tindie.com/products/exode/usb-powerdata-injector-android-autocarplay/
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/857/639/920/775/330/original/02479afbd97fb513.jpeg

2026-01-07 16:04:22 UTC

GitGoon: Git for gooners
Tired of your Pokemon Stadium mod to give Lapras heckin bonkers getting taken down by GitHub? Worry no more.
https://gitgoon.dev/

2026-01-07 15:18:03 UTC

"Virtual Woman is a software program that has elements of a chatbot, virtual reality, artificial intelligence, a video game, and a virtual human. It claims to be the oldest form of virtual life in existence, as it has been distributed since the late 1980s."
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Virtual_Woman
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/854/480/508/087/772/original/37f56f7d7c286bf2.jpeg

2026-01-07 14:54:16 UTC

"Every movie that inspired a generation of insufferable city-striving millennials"
😅😅😅
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DTIuUJykQHO/

2026-01-05 17:40:05 UTC

"The anti-aging chemicals used in rubber compounds are more effective when the tire is "exercised" on a frequent basis. The repeated stretching of the rubber compound actually helps resist cracks forming."
https://www.tirerack.com/upgrade-garage/why-does-tire-rubber-crack

2026-01-04 17:17:03 UTC

Home furnishing help: Any recent furniture/decor/homegoods you've bought and really like? Even if it's obscure style. Also places like Wayfair, Overstock, Ikea, etc.

2026-01-04 01:21:41 UTC

- reply

East of West Germany

2026-01-04 01:19:54 UTC

In Soviet Russia, commoner could go entire life without seeing more than handful of lamp. Then I come to America and see MANY lamp! Enough lamp for everyone!
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/834/197/789/825/884/original/7fc54ec329d816d3.jpeg

2026-01-03 19:26:45 UTC

"To the male Julodimorpha bakewelli beetle, a beer bottle lying on the ground looks like the biggest, most beautiful female he has ever seen.
He doesn't waste any time when he sees her. The male immediately mounts the object of his affection."
https://www.thoughtco.com/the-giant-jewel-beetle-1968152
"Nothing will dissuade him from his lovemaking, not even the opportunistic Iridomyrmex discors ants that will consume him bit by bit as he tries to impregnate the beer bottle. Should an actual Julodimorpha bakewelli female wander by, he will ignore her, remaining faithful to his true love"
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/832/808/900/475/182/original/703d20703bac0e73.jpeg
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/832/809/156/667/085/original/98d51e91cb8f04ca.jpeg

2026-01-03 10:02:28 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/830/590/333/814/174/original/cdc6290c07bf6350.jpeg

2026-01-03 03:18:28 UTC

https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1twMAtoCTx_6AcuD2aocrokLLuCQZMI9Fv9kFJ6Yl3-8/mobilebasic?pli=1

2026-01-03 02:05:23 UTC

Training AI on the Mewtwo voice in Pokemon Movie 1998 so it can tell me I'm not allowed to come yet

2026-01-02 21:46:33 UTC

Hey maybe the AI can fuck you, too
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/827/696/586/678/050/original/f7c616db456ad27d.jpeg

2026-01-02 03:50:54 UTC

TCP/IP is a social construct

2025-12-30 19:54:24 UTC

Save this came in handy today. Remember to search NEMA in your photo library.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/810/268/630/304/290/original/a299a55b430e1c9e.jpeg

2025-12-28 04:34:05 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/795/325/193/275/788/original/b588a87f29e8348d.jpeg

2025-12-27 17:03:31 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/792/609/806/807/324/original/49218ccd82d5a518.jpeg

2025-12-27 09:16:56 UTC

Any movie where you leave the theater thinking "I would fuck that alien" is a good movie

2025-12-27 06:39:44 UTC

Woot is currently selling 64 and 32 megabyte RAM sticks as a joke 😭
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/790/157/006/004/859/original/427507dcf224e6f0.jpeg

2025-12-26 22:03:13 UTC

https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/mystery-amazon-pallet-unboxing/

2025-12-25 19:02:24 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/781/752/578/981/506/original/915a61b7894017fd.mp4

2025-12-24 20:31:16 UTC

Lexus December to Remember – SNL https://youtu.be/WcEylCwkSxE

2025-12-24 14:51:02 UTC

The US National Weather Service formally defines a White Christmas as at least 1 inch of snow on the ground on the morning of Dec. 25.
https://www.weather.gov/dvn/ChristmasSnow

2025-12-24 14:30:13 UTC

Everything is GPU https://www.nytimes.com/2025/12/24/business/private-equity-continuation-funds.html?unlocked_article_code=1._E8.Tr4f.3h1LKtFrqg3h&smid=nytcore-ios-share

2025-12-24 14:07:45 UTC

Name Age Calculator
Estimate the age distribution of people based on their first name
The median living female named Jackie was born around 1962 and ranges from 53 to 69 years old.
https://name-age-calculator.randalolson.com/female/jackie

2025-12-21 17:50:59 UTC

When you realize that sleigh was transporting christmas presents
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/758/822/560/499/154/original/7d511742526a2d45.jpeg

2025-12-20 20:38:05 UTC

The time I found out 10 years ago that scrolling with a Dell touchpad set registry keys every few milliseconds to adjust the scroll rate in a hack way 😵‍💫
I did hear that someone at Microsoft complained to them about this.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/753/817/331/950/340/original/ecb7ab0020a564e4.mp4

2025-12-20 15:43:49 UTC

O RLY?
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/752/660/240/535/779/original/2db5d86831af27de.jpeg

2025-12-20 14:55:08 UTC

My cube 10 years ago
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/752/468/826/147/226/original/0576a03e8f694901.mp4

2025-12-20 00:05:55 UTC

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pY81HQ7byfU

2025-12-18 02:15:50 UTC

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A data scientist was involved here – they aced the 1 sweet helicopter to 2 Taylor Swifts golden ratio.

2025-12-18 02:06:22 UTC

SWEET: Apple's latest update to CarPlay adds slideshows of Taylor Swift and videos of helicopters
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/738/121/291/853/594/original/2630f57cde246f47.jpeg

2025-12-16 18:35:39 UTC

https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/730/686/659/871/436/original/ec2f1d85526bf49d.jpeg

2025-12-16 15:12:39 UTC

https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/reviews/roomba-obit/

2025-12-14 06:12:27 UTC

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It's like a theme park ride you get to drive around 😊
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/716/439/640/449/490/original/acc2fb43eccb9822.jpeg

2025-12-14 06:08:40 UTC

One of the best fringe benefits of a convertible each year is driving topdown through old-growth neighborhoods with Christmas lights. Went out for about two hours today.
https://media.infosec.exchange/infosec.exchange/media_attachments/files/115/716/424/733/013/540/original/bb5a6b40263559db.jpeg

2025-12-13 17:46:53 UTC

Every man has two deaths, when he is buried in the ground – and when Google Inactivity Manager despawns his account.