gregoryalanbader
Gregory Bader 🦍🌺

Functional Patterns HBS3
@junglebiomechanics
@bitcoinbiomechanics
@virtualbiomechanics
@junglebiomechanicsretreat
@junglerunners

Public Key

npub1cujzmry8q420d6n360wu3d53uxvn45m6twsz7pgfddjr09j3nxmq9vguzm

NIP-05 Address

gregory@primal.net

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsvwfpd3jrs248kafca8hwgk6g7rxf66da9hgp0q5ykkephjegendspzdmhxue69uhkx6r0wf6hxtnsdfmzumt9qyfhwumn8ghj7un9d3shjctzd3jjummjvu2qzzaz

Publishing to

chorus.pjv.me

relayable.org

Author Public Key

npub1cujzmry8q420d6n360wu3d53uxvn45m6twsz7pgfddjr09j3nxmq9vguzm

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Last Notes

2026-05-16 13:07:07 UTC

Just when I thought life couldn’t get any better -
Dominic Sylvester Bader arrived this morning at 11:04am, weighing 9 pounds even.
I got my boy!👶🏻
https://blossom.primal.net/00a83e838d7bc835b2470b246efa27a50ad6dc868cee318ecebe3fb2b12cc7e7.jpg

2026-04-30 15:37:10 UTC

You’re not “optimizing” if your biomechanics are broken.
Biohacks don’t fix bad mechanics.
If you sit like trash, walk inefficiently, and train without direction…
no supplement, cold plunge, or protocol is saving you.
Your baseline matters more than your hacks.
If your structure is off, everything you stack on top of it just reinforces dysfunction.
Real optimization starts with:
• How you stand
• How you move
Everything else is secondary.
If you want longevity, output, and durability…
fix your movement first.
Comment “OPTIMIZE” or DM me for a list of biomechanics tips!
#functionalpatterns #biohacking #optimization
https://blossom.primal.net/2697243f5360364cefade0ac1ffb578565359054f641ef1d8309716b365a1085.mp4

2026-04-18 18:52:21 UTC

Chilling at the market with Uncle Jungle @npub1spd…q6j7
https://blossom.primal.net/ee976625d26fdc60e945cbad6215c8d332064e6bb8808086b32a21aa54621aac.jpg

2026-04-17 17:21:24 UTC

@nprofile…tnmk sauna sesh! If you’re in Osa you should be a member!
https://blossom.primal.net/849b508c5f8995c17b23b04e899ed791dade20e21809efa0d8c3e6c55880795d.jpg

2026-04-14 21:47:25 UTC

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2026-04-14 16:23:42 UTC

🌊
https://blossom.primal.net/8e7df2e9bc61410dc8538d7cb6c64fd80488ed55a7c68ec96df7c43d6bfe357c.mov

2026-04-13 17:20:43 UTC

I wasn’t playing around with this one. We absolutely smashed it. FP training in nature. Thank you to those who heard the call and followed it.
#functionalpatterns #costarica #jungle #fitness
https://blossom.primal.net/3b3513b35dd72fb269e4ccf78b949f54ecedfa9006b928b75af0a7509d39ec5f.mp4

2026-04-11 23:31:31 UTC

Finally used ownyourposts.com for the first time! Wow that was easy! Thank you @nprofile…48ns
https://blossom.primal.net/32f2fa2b17c279d5c9bf99edf9073007afc50cddfe61b34d5b3d1a7dfabe3350.png

2026-04-04 07:40:12 UTC

After a year of roughin' it, l've finally settled fully into two home bases to practice @functionalpatterns out of.
Thank you to @junglemat.cr and @thebitcoinjungle for providing two amazing spaces for me to train out of.
I'm officially fully booked with privates and I'm now in building mode. The best way to train with me is by joining my Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership. The link for that is in my bio. It's worth a look👌
#functionalpatterns #gratitude #healthy
https://blossom.primal.net/ffed39b977ee52d82c2949bbf22be26088d19568e3d13bb5a58675653d71e9f3.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/43f414d6c9b08292def63349d136d30f1f29e9f75402f6929e542c10558f9f3b.jpg

2026-03-26 00:41:56 UTC

Not all movement is medicine.
You can move in ways that actually make you worse over time. If the way you're training reinforces compensation, you're building maladaptations that make movement less efficient, not more.
Most people don't even consider this. They just assume that because they're exercising, they're improving. Meanwhile they're increasing their risk of injury, dealing with more fatigue, and slowly losing the ability to move well.
Movement only works in your favor when it's organized correctly. If it's not, you're just practicing dysfunction.
#functionalpatterns
https://blossom.primal.net/08ba608efbe46864f8969d4b574f0c32b7bd711e2b1ca28e9ce8094bb0763f88.mov

2026-03-23 21:47:17 UTC

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Well said! It works in nutrition too - to help find irritators/triggers.

2026-03-23 14:00:56 UTC

Most people don’t need to add more to their training, they need to take things out.
If your structure is off, continuing to do the same exercises will just reinforce the same problems. That’s where the movement elimination protocol comes in. Instead of layering more on top, you remove the inputs that are driving compensation, excessive compression, or instability.
By eliminating what’s not serving you, you give your body the chance to reorganize. From there, you focus on fundamental movements like standing, walking, running, and throwing to rebuild coordination and improve how force moves through your system.
Once your structure improves, you can add things back in. The difference is now your body can actually handle them without breaking down.
#functionalpatterns #movementeliminationprotocol
https://blossom.primal.net/a2c33321b8a5a6888334d5cb576dbe47f01775900c0529d47eb497bd0f36c0e2.mov

2026-03-21 03:31:51 UTC

Mamá❤️
https://blossom.primal.net/3083237bfb0696c066bbe01466c8da8f9fd303283a1705b7fcded08f556e004d.jpg

2026-03-20 23:34:40 UTC

https://blossom.primal.net/24a933698f2b745cb00ada8ad8f50e60f9f4e14f1c97a46718397b571adb7801.jpg

2026-03-20 23:23:28 UTC

One of my favorite places on Earth🔥🧊
https://blossom.primal.net/0094ac18ca51207e7cb00ddbce123f372d86e404390b1951bebba9b0854e38e4.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/265f35b876fa659aa9ad10a03055a1822565f70a98985d36e9ec1f6913ef3692.mov

2026-03-19 20:44:35 UTC

Longevity isn’t just about staying active, it’s about how well you move.
Your gait cycle is the foundation of human movement. When you can walk and run efficiently, you’re coordinating the entire body in a way that supports muscle development, hormone regulation, and resilience to both physical and mental stress.
Most training approaches slowly decondition this system. They build isolated strength or flexibility while degrading the way you move, which is why people often have to chase more supplements, recovery methods, or interventions as they age.
When you improve your gait, everything else becomes easier to maintain. Focus on organizing your movement first, and longevity becomes a byproduct.
https://blossom.primal.net/b536d6a183b41d29258cf0c153bdde0619b2ec28b559b491928b9f238c1ad07d.mp4

2026-03-19 00:28:41 UTC

Hey look! It’s a Mei photoshoot 🌅
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2026-03-18 02:44:22 UTC

3/17/26 - BJJ Gi @npub1j89…jxvj
https://blossom.primal.net/6bb6db8df0aaf8f939817b0d7fd3ef38b4224c12b1a08f44a37c91354d8a644b.jpg

2026-03-17 17:27:00 UTC

Stretching doesn’t have to be forced.
Reciprocal inhibition is the mechanism that creates length in the body when opposing muscles contract. It’s how the body is designed to “stretch” naturally, without pulling on tissues passively.
You can try to create this effect in isolation, or you can integrate it across the entire system. When movement is organized correctly, opposing muscle groups coordinate together, producing functional mobility instead of disconnected flexibility.
By training in relation to the FP First 4, reciprocal inhibition becomes integrated into how you move, so range is created through control, not compensation.
#functionalpatterns #stretchcorrectly #reciprocalinhibition
https://blossom.primal.net/c145034d80111c8caf1a5f9fa0f0f2642bc96c88a1e28d51214211f707c67915.mov

2026-03-17 15:39:12 UTC

Life
https://blossom.primal.net/3093fe7daa28c64b3946d292200830bc350e41239fba014b4710058de2cb06c7.jpg

2026-03-16 15:25:10 UTC

The deep squat is often treated as the gold standard of mobility, but forcing that position can actually work against how the body produces force.
When people drop into deep squats passively, gravity is doing most of the work. This creates range by overly lengthening tissues rather than building the strength to control those positions. Over time that can make the joints more flaccid and reduce the body’s ability to generate force in deeper ranges.
Sprinting works in the opposite direction. As you improve your ability to produce and transfer force through the body, you naturally gain usable range of motion where it matters. Develop the capacity to sprint well, and deep ranges become strong and controlled rather than passive and unstable.
#functionalpatterns #sprintingisking
https://blossom.primal.net/07f5d078573b497f5409bfd6d4abf807f8c0c045680f55ece14380559c894c67.mp4

2026-03-15 23:44:26 UTC

Happy Birthday to our dear friend @nprofile…48xd send this man some Zaps!
https://blossom.primal.net/ff0284212c55008859d1c54b7ab953ec5f903aad2643d97ede72dfdd0ccf59bb.jpg

2026-03-15 23:05:51 UTC

Jungle climbin
https://blossom.primal.net/060bee8fb12ac99ed8beb7782f8e2f70ca864cc11c4572df248bd2fa6202ef59.mov

2026-03-14 04:33:26 UTC

3/13/26 - Striking @nprofile…jkkk
https://blossom.primal.net/1cd90747c088d1ed3f0c4113b9d534d706085248b76eef6dfa53df3576227816.jpg

2026-03-13 13:58:14 UTC

3/12/26 - BJJ Gi @npub1j89…jxvj
https://blossom.primal.net/5c4960c0dc9801117050b39a2e2fc9c709540b255aa8b5dc79698a9d9140b7a5.jpg

2026-03-12 03:45:10 UTC

🌷
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2026-03-12 03:43:01 UTC

THE VIRTUAL PERSONAL TRAINING PROGRAM
The Virtual Personal Training Program is a monthly, virtual personal training membership designed for people committed to becoming more functional in every area of life. Members receive personalized training sessions (4 or 8 per month), accountability checks, structured habit guidance, and access to around the clock support.
This membership is a lifestyle overhaul designed to rebuild you from the ground up - physically and mentally.
The Rules:
💧 100% Clean Diet
🚫 Complete Sobriety
📵 No Porn / Masturbation / Mindless Scrolling
💪 100% Functional Patterns Training
🌅 Live Intentionally
This is my most expensive, most exclusive membership type but the value that you get is absolutely high end. If you become a member you also get discounted access to the Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership (only $50/month) and free access to the monthly FP Equipment Classes. Join using the links below:
https://baderbiomechanics.buzops.com/package/vpt4
https://baderbiomechanics.buzops.com/package/vpt8
#functionalpatterns
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2026-03-12 03:41:20 UTC

THE UNLIMITED VIRTUAL GROUP CLASS MEMBERSHIP
The Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership includes 16 live (via Zoom) virtual group classes per week. As part of your membership you can attend as many of these classes as you’d like. I offer three class types: Dynamic, Corrective, and Myofascial Release. This membership is great for beginners and advanced FP students alike. The cost of this membership is $100/month but if you pay using Bitcoin the price drops to $55/month worth of Bitcoin:
Class Schedule:
M - Dynamics @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST
T - Correctives @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST
W - MFR @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST
Th - Dynamics @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST
F - Correctives @ 5am, 8am, 5pm CST
Sa - Dynamics @ 8am
Su - Recovery Day (No classes)
Class Descriptions🦾
🏃Dynamics Classes - These classes are catered to the most athletic clients that are looking to take their fitness to the next level. You will practice rotational movements using equipment like slam balls, dumbbells, resistance bands, and maces. After this class you will feel fatigued and sore but ready for more!
⚙️Correctives Classes - These classes are perfect for beginners but are great for members of all levels to attend consistently. In these classes you will learn exercises that effectively improve breathing, posture, muscle chain integration, and basic movements that will prepare you for the next level of dynamic classes. These classes are great if you are dealing with injuries or pain.
🌊Myofascial Release Classes - In these classes you will learn about Myofascial Release (MFR). MFR techniques are useful tools in the re-tensioning process. MFR improves connective tissue hydration and muscular tissue responsiveness. After taking this class you should feel sore like you worked out, yet able to move with a higher quality joint range of motion.
https://baderbiomechanics.buzops.com/package/unlimited
#functionalpatterns
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2026-03-12 03:38:37 UTC

THE INTEGRATION SERIES
The Integration Series is a 10-class follow along of the Functional Patterns Online 10-Week Course. The classes are every Saturday at 9am CST, conducted via Zoom. The entire series (all 10 classes) costs only $50. Here is the Integration Series schedule:
CYCLE 1: Starts 2nd Saturday of January
CYCLE 2: Starts 2nd Saturday of April
CYCLE 3: Starts 2nd Saturday of July
CYCLE 4: Starts 2nd Saturday of October
***You must have purchased the FP Online 10-Week Course to participate in this series.
https://functionalpatterns.com/products/the-10-week-online-program
https://baderbiomechanics.buzops.com/integrationseries
#functionalpatterns
https://blossom.primal.net/43927fe490e9fd031312c4502660a35a999959d81e5b031750547e8cf6f342cc.jpg
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2026-03-12 03:37:05 UTC

EQUIPMENT CLASSES
I now offer 1 live (via Zoom) group class per month where I instruct attendees on how to set up and use specific Functional Patterns tools/equipment! The classes will be every last Sunday of each month at 8:00am CST. Each class costs $20 and are the cheapest and easiest way to train with me. Check out the schedule!:
JANUARY: FP FUNCTIONECK
FEBRUARY: FP RG BELLS
MARCH: FP BANDS
APRIL: BARBELL/WEIGHT PLATES
MAY: FP RG BAR
JUNE: FP MFR TOOLS
JULY: FP LEG STRAP
AUGUST: DUMBBELLS/KETTLEBELLS
SEPTEMBER: FP MACES/CLUBS
OCTOBER: FP REGEN TRAINER
NOVEMBER: FP LEVERAGE KING
DECEMBER: FP TORQUE STRAP
Here is the link to sign up for those classes:
https://baderbiomechanics.buzops.com/EquipmentClass
#functionalpatterns
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2026-03-11 22:46:09 UTC

3/10/26 - BJJ Gi @nprofile…99wy
https://blossom.primal.net/8f591e950e8381bb615c0aa99c7bd46b8cb03a16420f2571f0a646de4580986e.jpg

2026-03-11 22:43:36 UTC

3/9/26 - BJJ No-Gi @npub1j89…jxvj
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2026-03-09 22:21:25 UTC

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It’s the Uvita Waterfall - right in my back yard

2026-03-09 22:11:25 UTC

Waterfall days💙
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2026-03-09 20:43:45 UTC

Thank you @nprofile…q2hn for the quality shots!
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2026-03-08 20:05:43 UTC

Exposing all the weaknesses🥊
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2026-03-08 00:28:33 UTC

We are so grateful to everyone who came out today to celebrate Gianna’s 2nd birthday with us. We truly appreciate you being there🙏
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2026-03-06 04:40:56 UTC

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🙏🙏

2026-03-06 00:41:08 UTC

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🙏🙏🙏

2026-03-06 00:13:11 UTC

Gg turned 2 today!
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2026-03-05 20:29:44 UTC

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Do your part to secure the network!
#nevent1q…x26x

2026-03-05 16:24:54 UTC

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Before getting into jumping be sure to have competency in the basic FP movements. I would recommend the FP Online 10-Week Course.

2026-03-05 16:22:12 UTC

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Nice! Yeah Nostr makes sense to me.

2026-03-05 16:20:18 UTC

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The best! Outdoors with a tiny roof to cover from rain.

2026-03-05 00:28:09 UTC

Solid day with solid friends🟠
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2026-03-04 22:54:24 UTC

Jumping is often recommended to improve bone density, but without proper movement mechanics it can do more harm than good.
Conditions like osteoporosis and osteopenia don't appear overnight. They often develop over years of poor movement patterns that place uneven stress on the body. If joints are already painful or basic movements feel unstable, adding impact before addressing how you move can increase strain instead of building resilience.
Before jumping becomes beneficial, the body has to be organized to absorb and redistribute force properly. Training the FP First 4 helps coordinate the legs, ribs, and spine so impact can be handled safely, allowing bone density to develop in a way that is sustainable over time.
#functionalpatterns #functionaljumping
https://blossom.primal.net/febaca72b56b7c0da18e41e4c91a9b14dcc71e42484bea104155da9d0819ae9a.mp4

2026-03-04 22:38:20 UTC

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Will Zap for sourdough focaccia

2026-03-04 03:36:33 UTC

3/3/26 - BJJ Gi @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/e0f34cbbdb1abb838c6d920c90b6b540ede807f4b6058346572f64bb8949a2db.jpg

2026-03-03 04:36:10 UTC

3/2/26 - BJJ No-Gi @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/0aad66f97f35e9dd6657d070b7316073457f132840367a4dee018a8697f6d356.jpg

2026-03-02 22:52:02 UTC

Elastic recoil is what makes movement efficient instead of strenuous.
Your muscles and fascia are designed to store and release energy like interconnected springs. When that rebound system works together, you don’t have to muscle through every step or lift. Force is absorbed, redirected, and returned, giving you power and stability without excess strain.
When training ignores this elastic quality, tissues stiffen, energy leaks, and joints take more stress than they should. By orienting your training around the FP First 4, you restore your body’s ability to recoil against gravity, improving efficiency and often reducing pain along the way.
#functionalpatterns #elasticrecoiltraining
https://blossom.primal.net/d9d159325ef30bda04b5afebeffabc9a54394e11d6afde897882f0e2a0f72680.mp4

2026-03-02 00:34:38 UTC

BIOMECHANICS RETREAT🦍🌺
- April 7th-11th, 2026 -
There is only one spot left! Here’s what’s included:
🏠Housing in the Costa Rican jungle
🍽️ Chef-prepared meals
🚕Transportation during the retreat
🦾 1 Private FP Session + 3 Group FP Classes
🙇‍♂️ Educational events w/ special guest speakers (Topics: Emotional Intelligence, Bitcoin, Nutrition)
🏄🏻‍♂️ All excursions (including surfing, waterfall hikes, ice bath/sauna, martial arts, and more…)
Investment: $1,950 (Deposit: $500 + flexible payments)
Out of Pocket Costs: Flights Only ✈️
*This retreat exists to give back - all profits and proceeds will directly benefit the local Costa Rican community, its independent businesses, and the land that welcomes us.*
Don’t miss out! This will be life-changing!
#functionalpatterns #retreat #biomechanics #nature #puravida
https://blossom.primal.net/32c679e58c4fd6f9935a53f7d4487059926deb2f2eccc514d4d6cf49b9ccfc92.mov

2026-02-28 00:45:33 UTC

Thank you @char_gallagher for the @rg.bell Equipment Class testimonial! I'm glad you found it beneficial!
@functionalpatterns absolutely spoils us practitioners with all the dope tech year after year.
I am incredibly grateful that the RG Bells made it to market and that they come with a whole system of techniques to help improve my movement and the movement of my clients. I'm just but a humble parrot🙏🦜
https://blossom.primal.net/fde08dfb0bfb0813ee23284f377c037e5868fe28487d6a860cc0b6fd4b0f5103.mov

2026-02-26 23:46:40 UTC

Sun diet
https://blossom.primal.net/ea358e6565b340575b7c080532a8579be587a856084e8887da0a0ea09455122b.jpg

2026-02-26 19:36:38 UTC

Pain is often treated as a local issue, while posture is dismissed as cosmetic or irrelevant.
Many traditional approaches downplay the relationship between posture and pain, largely because they don’t have a reliable method for changing posture in a measurable way. But when structure is asymmetrical and unstable, force is distributed unevenly through the body. Over time, that imbalance shows up as discomfort, tension, and chronic pain.
When posture becomes more symmetrical and stable, pain reduction is often a natural byproduct. If someone claims posture has nothing to do with pain, they should first be able to demonstrate that they can actually change posture in the first place.
#functionalpatterns #postureandpain
https://blossom.primal.net/c4a8f3ff8b7ce54e686277727de586e99ff083552cdae1848286e7476a818647.mov

2026-02-26 01:19:39 UTC

2/24/26 - BJJ Gi @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/211328293710808fec93e3d9282e7bd66415c9ef6209ca24466e8935b6b87034.jpg

2026-02-26 00:13:48 UTC

Gg 🌅
https://blossom.primal.net/9d07bcf0df557f6fc9be443e01b2fce9b609ef2934f80c05bf6bff5f07ec9465.jpg

2026-02-25 12:22:28 UTC

No caption needed
https://blossom.primal.net/0e7c47ce513e4b176b215acc238f1441c4cb8fe433c62a8af0584ee51524c970.mov

2026-02-25 04:15:39 UTC

Breathwork isn’t automatically beneficial.
If your structure is imbalanced, forcing breathing patterns on top of it can actually reinforce dysfunction. Breathing doesn’t happen in isolation. It’s influenced by posture, rib position, spinal orientation, and how the entire body is organized. If any part of that system is off, your breathing mechanics will reflect it.
Trying to “fix” breathing without addressing the structure underneath is like adjusting the symptom instead of the cause. The body functions as an integrated system, and the only way to improve breathing long term is to improve how the whole system moves.
Focus on the FP First 4 to restore balance to posture and mechanics, and better breathing becomes a byproduct of better movement.
#functionalpatterns #breathingmechanics
https://blossom.primal.net/23c8d1957521f0e1facacdaea006271b7a0bc2a5f94904e640bf2437443e5e70.mov

2026-02-24 02:26:26 UTC

2/23/26 - BJJ No-Gi @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/98ceb93da1da90fdb203718dc87ceac1f3b86a34034d25acab3fbc34e1952fcb.jpg

2026-02-23 21:52:09 UTC

JUNGLE BIOMECHANICS RETREAT 🦍🌺
Uvita, Costa Rica • April 7-11, 2026
This is a 4 day immersion into self, community, and nature.
What’s included:
🏠 Housing in the Costa Rican jungle
🍽️ Chef-prepared meals
🚕Transportation during the retreat
🦾 1 Private FP Session + 3 Group FP Classes
🙇‍♂️ Educational events w/ special guest speakers (Emotional Intelligence, Bitcoin, Nutrition)
🏄🏻‍♂️ All excursions (including surfing, waterfall hikes, ice bath/sauna, martial arts, and more…)
Investment: $1,950 (Deposit: $500 + flexible payments)
Out of Pocket Costs: Flights Only ✈️
This retreat is intentionally small.
Only 3 Spots Left!
***This retreat exists to give back - all profits and proceeds will directly benefit the local Costa Rican community, its independent businesses, and the land that welcomes us.***
Secure your spot using the link in my bio!🔗
https://blossom.primal.net/a1bc71147e9804ce249452c4ce624b42de1442c0652372d9919b2a6612e92ebe.jpg

2026-02-23 21:11:49 UTC

Thank you @jiujitsuisnature for the @functioneck class testimonial!
I came up with the Equipment Classes to help my clients build an arsenal of @functionalpatterns tools over the course of a year.
There is an entire system of techniques behind every tool that FP offers - it’s truly incredible. I’m extremely grateful for the work @theleverking and the team puts in to keep bringing these technologies to market. Every tool that gets dropped is yet another way to help a client like Sam fix his issues🙏
https://blossom.primal.net/a96ba2f1b49f846756b370184803fabbcac603cdc79d09775a7023e56f843451.mp4

2026-02-22 18:00:38 UTC

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Osa is the place for sure! Domi, Uvita, Ojochal

2026-02-22 17:59:48 UTC

I picked the prettiest flower 🌺
https://blossom.primal.net/f7a42118e04b0e76fa4870f3e63fd54621827e21d5f29733b409b022b9bc3254.jpg

2026-02-21 02:00:36 UTC

Reciprocal inhibition is the mechanism that allows one muscle group to lengthen when its opposing muscles contract. It’s how the body creates stretch naturally, without forcing range.
You can try to create this in isolation by stretching individual muscles, or you can integrate it across the entire system. When movement is organized correctly, opposing muscle groups coordinate automatically, producing functional mobility instead of passive flexibility.
At FP, reciprocal inhibition isn’t chased through random stretching. It’s integrated through movement aligned with the FP First 4, so length is created through control, not compensation.
#functionalpatterns #integratedstretching #reciprocalinhibition
https://blossom.primal.net/f793195ed608bd983dcbf9d0a76023188f2e0c11e79aab93bc0fdb8eeb311b3e.mov

2026-02-21 01:59:14 UTC

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I want
#nevent1q…cyk8

2026-02-20 22:06:58 UTC

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Nice what part?

2026-02-20 22:06:33 UTC

🐆🌱
https://blossom.primal.net/54a60ba4b9cd57d3b39d4618bf44832f88209732aee5205305b8ae64ca3f6725.jpg

2026-02-20 17:03:15 UTC

Sometimes when I start putting a shirt on I think to myself, “Wtf are you doing? You live in Costa Rica.”

2026-02-20 01:58:12 UTC

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This ALMOST makes me want to own pants

2026-02-20 01:55:51 UTC

2/19/25 - BJJ Gi @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/d7bcd406846895f5a3562a413d0266bb6ac5f05dce6bd3ce00ff3ee4de2cb566.jpg

2026-02-18 00:34:01 UTC

Thank you @nprofile…9tqc for the testimonial!
The Unlimited Virtual Group Class Membership is perfect for people that don't have a @functionalpatterns practitioner near them. The beauty of FP is you don't need very much equipment to start off with - just a band and a set of dumbbells can get you through 95% of the workouts.
If you pay using Bitcoin it only costs $55/month for UNLIMITED classes. This is super easy to do and I can help educate you on how to use Bitcoin if you aren't familiar with it - it's just as easy as using CashApp, Venmo, or Zelle).
If you're interested in joining, shoot me a DM and I'll get you onboarded!
#functionalpatterns #groupfitness #virtualtraining
https://blossom.primal.net/d240de04e531127ea19a5f8e641da838397208050000a4ee88bbfc13aa351c7a.mp4

2026-02-17 16:37:33 UTC

I highly recommend this soap! @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/ad2beb4c3fa94d751a40ae6bc475c1db5352f0b224db35c692e500cb60e69379.jpg

2026-02-16 22:50:28 UTC

Es una Vida Hermosa☀️🌴
https://blossom.primal.net/a9026c1c3198e827a5bf3072b887cd233e4a0e6748b4cb54683730f4b238859f.jpg

2026-02-15 23:50:00 UTC

🩷🩷🩷
https://blossom.primal.net/0568db74cf05e82cd1b47f6064c4186f0f36dbacba8aa5848f4f06d5626c89f5.jpg

2026-02-15 12:47:12 UTC

My first🌸
https://blossom.primal.net/1323cd02f99c5c593eda0bcb978f2dcc8eaed5757604f00fd7506751814e9198.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/bcc6707c9a07af3dfe98c98676413e2a1dd36dc15d44df256024bd657c2c953b.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/057904239e3c390b50cf9292b2343d1839373e82e4afb4a1c15b7265e5e98437.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/42643d3d754959e899233b01271a6c58e2e311bbdd882e1bf39377f147880b25.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/5126dec14c34b49b34b2fae36025c574368b280c858a26aaa997140e768b4e42.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/e5d9ba2cb96f379f3e41998d285c86b9868636bc0d5a41ce8584212bbd711860.jpg

2026-02-14 01:23:31 UTC

Sofia🌸
https://blossom.primal.net/ca36439be4daa2ab7f49a8ee7517700731007eff6accaf814a7a4d95a26dff4f.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/95a3f6b116389c439789a0eac023d7febea1ac7d8e98b055a46279098dc908c4.jpg

2026-02-13 14:11:10 UTC

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Bang on!

2026-02-13 14:05:50 UTC

@paulinthejungle has been going 🦍💩 with the @functionalpatterns training these last few weeks. This man gets it.
#functionalpatterns #training #jungle #health #primal
https://blossom.primal.net/74de1412b5f9d60d15c02426f06561262082c821a3f723a1581fe6a5e197f720.mov

2026-02-12 15:59:38 UTC

Centro Geográfico de Costa Rica 🇨🇷
https://blossom.primal.net/66e23700ae77fbd5a111c740d34561964ed43bd5c2ee8034fbb682e87bcda54f.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/e1f1f2768633eb9b95e91ad7c0727e49cae0ad6c00cb77f87b526883a191f6b1.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/7f66308ec8e31744660fdf823d5aba925739bcad95e381e4a665e34586ac0e8d.jpg

2026-02-11 16:49:39 UTC

@jan.frional has been crushing it in his @functionalpatterns journey. Here he’s using the @regentrainer the @rg_bar_ and @theleverageking right from the comfort of his home!
https://blossom.primal.net/43b0a22392c1607ed39ec6815d0b9e65c3036ab7f4b5668051e16fbe1fe5fd7a.mov

2026-02-10 13:20:40 UTC

2/9/26 - BJJ No-Gi @nprofile…ve4c
https://blossom.primal.net/e02138a0ff8295f4548037513c17288c61c6da6810820d0982a4cce957854b7b.jpg

2026-02-10 13:18:45 UTC

2/6/26 - Striking @npub156g…0egx
https://blossom.primal.net/15fdb2e624f3c9c604b700bcb84d3500fd3eae6b8b46a5c3bec190e86c6ee74b.jpg

2026-02-09 18:46:24 UTC

Deadlifts are often treated as a foundational movement, but for most people they come with hidden costs.
Most bodies already have some degree of spinal twist. Loading a heavy hinge on top of that twist doesn’t correct it, it reinforces it. Over time, this leads to increased spinal compression and deeper asymmetries that can show up as pain or injury down the line.
Deadlifts also fall short when it comes to hip stability. They don’t train transverse torsion, which is what actually stabilizes the hips during multi directional movement like running. The result is a pattern that compresses certain areas excessively while leaving others, especially the hips, underprepared and unstable.
https://blossom.primal.net/c0cf3e9f71f2b4105b2c0ede4166713fffe4f9bfde8f612607aad202dfd02a8c.mp4

2026-02-08 21:12:32 UTC

River day 🦦
https://blossom.primal.net/ed9d0fe10e4cf5015a13a76831aa70f066b35ac3069143f85bf3afadf032139b.jpg

2026-02-06 23:31:40 UTC

https://blossom.primal.net/7d5cba04d50f13fb1a0d922080c5e5a98de22bcd519a019b03157cf3fa5185af.jpg

2026-02-06 19:14:37 UTC

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Oneee offff usssss

2026-02-06 00:02:56 UTC

More range of motion isn’t always better.
There is an optimal range of motion for every joint. Pushing past that doesn’t make you more mobile, it often makes you more unstable. When joints are taken into excessive ranges without the structure to control them, the result is usually hypermobility, followed by joint instability, pain, and eventually injury.
A big misconception in fitness is that all mobility work is good and that creating more ROM is always beneficial. Most people chase range mindlessly, stretching and forcing joints into positions they can’t actually support. That’s not mobility, that’s loss of control.
Optimal range of motion comes from how well your training aligns with fundamental human movement. When movement is organized around the FP First 4, joints gain the amount of range they can control, not more than they can handle, which is what keeps them resilient long term.
https://blossom.primal.net/fbdb9c71bd101a9083a94805df5832bca8cf5d99c5a66924e98725544352fb21.mp4

2026-02-05 20:37:07 UTC

Sibling snuggles🌸🌸
https://blossom.primal.net/35686f0934108d152fd52e4d12433b0fdcef8e0af0960bd476a98ac9ca89c39b.jpg

2026-02-04 02:52:22 UTC

Stretching is often sold as the solution, but for a lot of people it's part of the problem.
Most bodies aren't just "tight." They're imbalanced. They have areas that are restricted and areas that move too much.
Traditional stretching targets the tissues that are easiest to access, which are usually the loose ones, and over time this only increases instability and hypermobility in the system.
Mobility comes from organization, not from forcing tissue length. The Functional Patterns training system restores balance by stabilizing what moves too much and mobilizing what doesn't, without sacrificing joint integrity along the way.
https://blossom.primal.net/b1c1cf702e187b61c5fc4806714ca96973fbe06bfb099d6ed6e040141ea71e1a.mov

2026-02-04 01:39:54 UTC

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One thing that I didn’t expect about living in Costa Rica that I like is how easy it is to find raw milk in regular stores (and other health foods in general).
One thing that I didn’t expect about living in Costa Rica that I dislike is it’s difficult to find certain household items and when you do find them they can be really expensive. Example: it took me forever to find a handheld vacuum and I paid $60 for it. Not a big deal or deterrent at all; in fact I mostly enjoy the intentional simplicity.

2026-02-04 01:32:19 UTC

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Let’s fucking gooo @npub1cn4…3vle
#nevent1q…gzq7

2026-02-02 01:07:46 UTC

Gg date 🌊
https://blossom.primal.net/06945837a5b153daed0366de6f67f857865b7e584ea5780353f00a086e77ff18.jpg

2026-02-01 01:15:39 UTC

Sharing great food with new friends. Feels amazing.
https://blossom.primal.net/6c5644b3b2b29d9301202fd01c89a3ad2e5780d7bc6ae7e9a5e6298424512656.jpg

2026-02-01 01:11:49 UTC

Using the Functional Patterns RG Bell in the jungle. Cause why not?
https://blossom.primal.net/b8da163265eacfdb637b120e03c14744ef0e51340a2fdf1d2bc0acb82d8ea7a6.mov

2026-01-30 23:04:18 UTC

My daughter, Mei, has been recruiting her friends to do @functionalpatterns training with her. She’s doing FP workouts on her own now and she always asks me “Dad, when are going to train?” Out of all of the clients I’ve ever worked with, Mei is my favorite result.
https://blossom.primal.net/66a99856eeecca1dfde33ddabaea3511f9f458620af7c6896a9c403460c43ab9.mov

2026-01-30 22:53:32 UTC

🫛
https://blossom.primal.net/03e45710624939567f29e9354d01ef766e385a6a21e7ca410dd1868823a1c123.jpg

2026-01-30 21:16:29 UTC

Piña 🍍
https://blossom.primal.net/169305d8f5b629abd7eb91ee4afbff772c2c6eca756c265f4d90719612df6f40.jpg

2026-01-30 02:33:55 UTC

Celebrating 1 Year Living in Costa Rica! 🇨🇷
https://blossom.primal.net/aebdc442591079a5bf3cda85fbf12fcbd1f2addac909f86fef3c98d6a99ad2cb.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/b01ed454de4765ca28cd4416604a208fb42b06ea14fc23f2b8a70efe5a4c3640.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/434dc5f2168b571d637a6ae0d7cf55c9cd8fe7999d45a8ac682c0a4b7232ca0a.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/2d59ce50bd83f771d318836b592dc6e2cfbe34e026385ad0ff910aeb1e23d234.jpg
https://blossom.primal.net/2faca61630c45199a152d7c81441c370b397c4355a31166111d0898ec4bd0bc8.jpg

2026-01-29 18:23:46 UTC

🤙
https://blossom.primal.net/312f92bd2245d29dd532e501005d1136ee6ab4ab3fe07db9a3969233e11de41b.jpg

2026-01-29 16:28:09 UTC

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Let’s gooo - activate your wallet so I can Zap that Zap cherry!