The Wizard of Ounce

Shit takes and stolen content

Featured contributor for The Verge

Public Key

npub13lrg7wcd63747psdaz3762fmmd5yz3w0yv8njj08wf2atxt97rwq7vvus5

NIP-05 Address

mrsaturday@shitposter-world.mostr.pub

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsgl3508vxagl2lqcx73gld9yaak6zpgh8jxreef8nhy4w4n9jlphqpz4mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerfw36x7tnsw43q8r6sru

Publishing to

relay.ditto.pub

Author Public Key

npub13lrg7wcd63747psdaz3762fmmd5yz3w0yv8njj08wf2atxt97rwq7vvus5

Show more details

Last Notes

2026-03-29 11:08:54 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…9grc What about horny an der Oder

2026-03-29 05:02:41 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…eh9a There aren't many supergroups where whole is more than the sum of the parts, but Asia's milquetoast trash definitely isn't on that list

2026-03-29 00:04:14 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/5c/a3/e3/5ca3e3e6664b264e434e284d80d34dec7052db98e2390a6b71a029813fe23cc0.webp?name=jB428Vy05lsWEA.webp

2026-03-28 23:40:51 UTC

"Yeah, I get all my news from social media"
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/aa/35/3b/aa353b8b30040062382892e9c710aa4256615eb5682cbcefc5ebd3a490b05a50.webp?name=mAEtPqW9kAT0fg.webp

2026-03-28 23:33:21 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…m927 It's for the country's 250th anniversary, that's what makes it worse

2026-03-28 23:31:55 UTC

- reply

Denny's waitresses need to watch out

2026-03-28 23:31:25 UTC

THE BLASIAN IS BACK
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/f7/93/4b/f7934be546d353927bcec180046641c6ab7505c7fd18b644447a351fb4814518.webp?name=ZVcKHtXOgj1FJg.webp

2026-03-28 13:10:29 UTC

Hytale devs have no idea what they're unleashing on their community
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/3b/04/b0/3b04b0fbfa85179a40efdfb4d869cbf63a4c6cf0aed8738b0cddbf87a6e361e7.webp?name=Cs8aj9OBTWlNzg.webp

2026-03-28 13:06:18 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…hu5l wife

2026-03-28 12:45:44 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…clfg @nprofile…rl2l

2026-03-28 12:30:31 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…xsvf @nprofile…t8de That would be assaulting a federal officer, and neither of you would be a problem anymore

2026-03-28 12:30:02 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…lawh @nprofile…t8de That boomer posted this to psych himself up for a Hannity binge session

2026-03-27 01:21:09 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…l5m0 Zesty James tells me it's Tumblr

2026-03-27 00:07:42 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/3b/c1/8b/3bc18ba8a5c34a3f51c2c20d21e0dd0340d8e1b77bab9207f410153765cb9074.mp4?name=pmw6yl6DWl0Tww.mp4

2026-03-26 12:40:18 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/f4/37/7a/f4377a5ec94aaf86ebeb369bee4832b8db18d97bb5aa58fcb804ca35ab3e9e3d.webp?name=_Rn2q17LG7j0fg.webp

2026-03-24 12:29:02 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…mdcm I love @nprofile…0vmn because half of the posts are "look at this majestic beast in flight" and half are the bats being manhandled by some zookeeper

2026-03-23 10:28:51 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…qj3d Brought to you by the brilliant minds behind Charlottesville

2026-03-22 14:57:51 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…0vwd I guess I should explain
When you're 12 and edgy and at a soda machine and want to prove to your friends you're hardcore, you put a squirt of every single type of drink they have into your cup and drink it. It's called a "suicide" when you do that, but I guess other places call it a "graveyard" or "kamikaze" and they call it "swamp water" in Canada.
I've only had two drinks actually canned that taste like that, OK Cola (failed attempt at a Gen X-focused drink in the mid 90s) and Spezi. They sell it at World Market locations in America

2026-03-22 14:53:05 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…0vwd Spezi tastes like a "suicide" drink. Not sure how they have it over there

2026-03-22 13:32:31 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag @nprofile…e0xm I really hope he comes back, but I can see why he left

2026-03-22 11:30:15 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…e0xm The Panhandle has always been arid, poorly developed, and extremely sparsely populated

2026-03-22 01:19:38 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…kdjy "Your terms are acceptable"
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/f2/2c/2d/f22c2df107ec84d0f960d02e8fa570f8b9056d0a452e8879fd73700c8feaa42b.gif?name=xZ8SYyqgJncoMg.gif

2026-03-21 12:58:35 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…cs7q Sometimes I miss my cards (I had a Badlands and Wheel of Fortune) and sometimes I don't (the collection weighed 50 pounds and newer sets trounce older sets)

2026-03-21 10:53:07 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…dugj Smaug found the creatine

2026-03-20 23:10:25 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…l5m0 @nprofile…rjk0 @nprofile…4c5e same

2026-03-20 06:07:06 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/46/92/f5/4692f568b1d4af55b27b71dd46a0b0adbecf08c71746d620876ec3083d8b0281.webp?name=cgp8w-nUm3LwLA.webp

2026-03-20 02:41:57 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/80/9b/12/809b12d2bfafcc10b076329921562c1c16348b76569a23da3c4495c7c3b9ff02.mp4?name=kTUpJOBLGDY0lg.mp4

2026-03-20 01:26:35 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/e5/61/9a/e5619ae400d56428cf6519879940d49112a6c6ae506165c01a6975250a1f970d.webp?name=__ekBkDqTaI9DA.webp

2026-03-08 18:40:26 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…2llx Imagining this with Lou Holtz's lisp makes this even funnier

2026-03-04 13:33:54 UTC

I can tell it's spring because the stupid ass robin that runs on Australian time was singing in the parking lot at 3 am again

2026-03-02 01:42:28 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…xz9d
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/13/cf/86/13cf86185dc5511b796b9393ff2fda36191ee1ed262a1c2b3c134c450a243cff.webp?name=UJ3Aw1HCpGoqmw.webp

2026-03-01 03:58:56 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…d668 Oh no
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/48/3a/07/483a070d86dc97e2a32ff98fd4741438c1dcad5ffee60030b75ea713d855a8fe.webp?name=Bb7tYXwdTCMU7g.webp

2026-03-01 03:33:57 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…3tsl Think he's done a line?

2026-03-01 01:45:11 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/71/23/26/71232604834f8f47000043741fa9f348022fce09af65f033d8cfdd85850d5b7a.webp?name=er4dO2jC5AjDlA.webp

2026-02-28 22:59:23 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/0c/89/86/0c8986f4235db9a9132c64a963be63a4ba1cc76305c574ff5a55500f05a1324b.gif?name=D1hV8IfyRIr_uQ.gif

2026-02-28 14:45:22 UTC

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/58/52/08/585208f8e7339f00e10684adec6e05dfaa68b969c241829f68b3a4d36761549f.mp4?name=4x0tDFz4Cmm_iw.mp4

2026-02-28 11:43:50 UTC

Of course they attacked Iran at the end of the month. How many assholes in DC do you think put their life savings into Polymarket before this kicked off?

2026-02-27 15:46:31 UTC

New Pokemon trailer just dropped
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/cc/f9/bc/ccf9bc1487100a2f71dc40801e462f6666be594951294c47636f906358cf8ff6.webp?name=hFlRDta_O605TA.webp

2026-02-27 13:37:34 UTC

- reply

Costco, including the parking lot, takes up 14 acres minimum. Kowloon Walled City was 6.4 acres. I can see why

2026-02-26 00:59:10 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…ekr7 @nprofile…4c5e Yeah
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/08/d4/d2/08d4d26b5baba9ad011b9a2bc0ac9fc1f2563a715befe3cb45312419f06d5f19.webp?name=warUsVqnlDmHdg.webp

2026-02-24 18:05:29 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag @nprofile…6wcx From what I saw on the FEC spreadsheet, they use a dash system to say what box it is. The software company was 103-550.
Honestly, it's unclear. He might be (and probably is) full of it, or he might actually have a list of 30 voters registered to boxes in Suite 103, and the internet's doing their normal "erm actually" thing where they think whoever has the spiciest zing wins. Only way to know for sure is to get a hold of San Diego's voter rolls, and I really don't care enough to.

2026-02-24 17:40:58 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag @nprofile…6wcx The UPS Store in question is in Suite 103 of the apartment building. Mysteriously, none of the liberal outlets holding a dunk contest have mentioned this fact or said "California voter rolls don't show any voters at 4142 Adams St. Ste 103."
Poking around, I did find a voting software company with a box at that very UPS store registered with the FEC, ironically enough.

2026-02-24 11:55:31 UTC

This game's gonna be weird, I can tell already
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/8f/5b/46/8f5b46484358ef145a9da5c0339381f22715bb9b82e86fd35d3b8eeaa40ab46f.webp?name=TsbFFSuesLr5sw.webp

2026-02-24 04:09:28 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…mms0 >Deutsche Bank
Babe reset the clock

2026-02-24 04:08:55 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…p49c @nprofile…fcss So can a judge in a bad mood, "probable cause" is in the eye of the beholder

2026-02-24 03:28:16 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…r9u2 @nprofile…d84g @nprofile…5kp5 I have a shitpost on my hard drive where it's Adam Sandler in Uncut Gems showing one off. This post convinced me to delete it

2026-02-24 03:25:37 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fcss @nprofile…p49c @chainsaw_appreciator@nicecrew.federal
It's in a weird gray area, like most things subject to the Miller Test. I know 3d depictions are illegal.

2026-02-23 23:49:19 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…e0xm I remember being on Twitter and seeing some libs snarking about how a white ethnostate's basketball team would look. I got blocked when I asked how the black ethnostate's swim team would do

2026-02-23 09:27:54 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…lw35 I'll pass but ISIS Labubu goes hard

2026-02-23 09:25:47 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…jph8 sauce

2026-02-23 09:24:43 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…lw35 >people should stop eating slop and instead try this slimy fish in slime
Excellent post

2026-02-23 09:23:21 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…04yf ebassi is a symptom, not a disease

2026-02-23 00:52:00 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fsu6 uoh

2026-02-23 00:50:08 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fcss Hotwheels was doing cool stuff with typefacing and was getting into the Bible. You can make the most of a short life without becoming a diaperfur tenderqueer that podcasts about Funko Pops

2026-02-23 00:43:18 UTC

This might be one of the last times you'll see the US seriously compete with Canada in hockey. The NCAA allowing CHL players onto college rosters will cripple development of American hockey talent.

2026-02-23 00:37:58 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…p49c @nprofile…fcss You're going to find that on altchans in general. It's like running a phpBB board and not expecting a dickpill spam thread every 10 minutes. Until they update the way the software works and find a way to keep it from being botted, it's just going to be that way.

2026-02-22 22:48:56 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fcss Moot just joined the rat race rather than becoming a communist diaperfur that spent the rest of his days railing against free speech

2026-02-22 22:42:06 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fcss IIRC Hotwheels let the chomos use private boards with 20+ character hashes for names as long as they didn't shit up the rest of the site. His problem with the site was purely troll's remorse and spite towards Jim Watkins.

2026-02-22 04:52:55 UTC

It's not always as bad as it looks
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/cd/a5/7b/cda57bec5bd9ef095dae235649df18bfb708c05a4c85dc9b1c6e54d3791f0a4b.webp?name=eLbm3zeG9eh37g.webp
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/a5/45/a4/a545a4ca4891e3dd0d95c002ba8fca13cc388cfeafb78c6dedfa1c68a27ece08.webp?name=-yAnMLKNIwMTFg.webp

2026-02-22 01:06:14 UTC

The director of "Gayniggers from Outer Space" was a Danish guy that ran for public office under the name "The Fatmaster", then married a woman from Mozambique and had five kids with her
Legend

2026-02-21 02:37:54 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…k73h @nprofile…e2rp Kewpie mayonnaise

2026-02-21 02:25:48 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…d668 @nprofile…g80s I wouldn't call them people

2026-02-21 02:25:24 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…0vmn smug

2026-02-21 01:46:51 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…cvrl Give it credit, it's not shooting the kids in school

2026-02-20 19:15:31 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…pgx0 @nprofile…5vpa @nprofile…5kp5 @nprofile…fsu6 What's your order?
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/97/87/4f/97874fb033d1635dcf646ed52edd310e178c674fe8b6ef46c67305d1d59e3f8b.webp?name=BUGSlC7SSZdqbQ.webp

2026-02-20 19:15:13 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…e2rp I had one here, it's legit and they use locally sourced eggs

2026-02-20 10:10:19 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…dugj I can fix her

2026-02-20 04:48:07 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…29ua
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/5a/75/a8/5a75a85f511236f42ca5e874b655465a69c184210b778ab2e3e898730eb45e2d.webp?name=0ng6991XYAgRzQ.webp

2026-02-20 04:07:05 UTC

Yes, I phonepost, and no, I don't care

2026-02-20 04:04:18 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fsu6 I went to crop out the iFunny watermark and the Photo Editor app said "I understood that reference"
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/f6/6f/c3/f66fc3bf8de75b909294880e217395944e22167c2318cd606aacf6e6ee3618db.webp?name=ltDYX2tmu-oHnA.webp

2026-02-20 03:57:58 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…fsu6 Product placement? In my sci-fi?
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/6a/2f/45/6a2f457cffc6348185a8c04d6947fd98df0f6c282c0ead0be1e717c747e29b1e.webp?name=HI7pmqs6Uh0iPA.webp

2026-02-20 03:43:14 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…xz9d Crossposted to /r/phaseconnect

2026-02-19 22:53:34 UTC

I should just start muting anyone that posts soyjaks

2026-02-19 22:51:12 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…cqap @nprofile…fsu6 @nprofile…8m52 The only reason to get Pizza Hut over one of those little mom and pop pizza shops is because it's cheaper or you have picky little kids to feed

2026-02-19 22:41:57 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…cqap @nprofile…8m52 @nprofile…fsu6 Seriously. Being able to sit down at a Pizza Hut is just as dated as Gorbachev references, though
https://youtube.com/watch?v=p3jA0SVtyUE

2026-02-19 22:31:59 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…jph8 I'm a Packers fan, but even if I wasn't, I'm happy the state told the Bears to stuff it when they started demanding to not pay property taxes on their stadium site. Go be a welfare queen somewhere else

2026-02-19 22:27:55 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…jph8 Legitimately good news

2026-02-19 21:25:26 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…qjtr I think it's because they can get away with being more open about it. It is kind of funny to have seen the roles reverse in the last 25 years

2026-02-19 21:23:49 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…wajc Well, yeah. I don't know if the Meadowlands situation was fueled by pettiness over property taxes like this one is, though. The Bears have handled this situation about as poorly as possible without threatening to leave the area entirely.
Do you think the locals would care?

2026-02-19 21:17:10 UTC

Illinois is about to not have an NFL team for the first time in over 100 years
https://wgntv.com/northwest-indiana/indiana-lawmakers-to-meet-thursday-morning-to-review-proposal-for-bears-to-build-new-stadium-in-northwest-indiana/

2026-02-19 20:53:32 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag Add another to the list
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/0a/96/84/0a9684a3cbe1e83a6b7d67aba88477c2bd6e17f4540601bb74ad3c85a42167ca.webp?name=2LDnmZaDVsx9SQ.webp

2026-02-19 12:33:24 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…e0xm "You don't understand, we want infinity immigrants on our own terms"

2026-02-17 09:13:43 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…qjtr We've dismantled almost all of ours, so I get it

2026-02-17 02:39:08 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…5kp5 @nprofile…a0uj Better presidents have tried

2026-02-16 07:16:31 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…rkgj It should be obvious if these people were the least bit familiar with Christian thinking

2026-02-14 07:24:52 UTC

AI thinks Alex Jones is Paul Heyman

2026-02-14 02:06:43 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…5kp5 He just needs to make the Phase Connect lineup his cabinet for a complete mold takeover of the country. I want DC covered in toxic fungus by 2032. Then we will be free

2026-02-13 23:22:06 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…3tsl If only the story itself was nearly as interesting
https://www.popularmechanics.com/science/animals/a69631946/chernobyl-dogs-dna-rapid-evolution-science/

2026-02-13 23:16:52 UTC

I go through the trouble of making a simple VBA script for an Excel sheet I was working on, then find out some computers don't have standalone Excel, so you have to use the cloud version that doesn't recognize VBA and wants you to script it in Python instead
I don't want to hear about how OpenOffice/LibreOffice "just don't work right" again
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/2a/f5/84/2af5846a170b61375ef6b67f30d33a2467d0dc4c4b3940760731616fa1e64438.webp?name=IHnXns-B5d60Pg.webp

2026-02-13 23:12:33 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…rkgj Last fish fry I was at, they sold beer to people standing in line for their food, and the priest was drunk and going around chatting with his parishoners. 10/10

2026-02-12 23:49:01 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag @nprofile…t8de

2026-02-12 22:57:01 UTC

https://x.com/iamjustmaro/status/2021894550001004609
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/d7/b9/77/d7b9772ef6d4ea829d4e0e822725e0a814a0b739dc742240db4e986382da6523.webp?name=GMvK7Kt3EzKBeA.webp

2026-02-12 07:19:28 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…wajc Anon needs a med check

2026-02-11 16:27:55 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tw32 @nprofile…a0cz @nprofile…5fvr @nprofile…3tsl
https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/dc/5e/42/dc5e42fdfebf660c8e8d8ddb306ea8467019432c1b5b1c3a969a07ff7e67f70c.webp?name=4DL3ewP-zleX2A.webp

2026-02-11 16:18:35 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…eh9a Moloch's been hitting the creatine, I see

2026-02-11 16:15:52 UTC

The reason why Americans love bringing up WW2 is we haven't won a war since then

2026-02-11 16:14:10 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…3tsl @nprofile…vmr8 @nprofile…5fvr @nprofile…a0cz Big talk from the generation that got Fortnite danced on by a bunch of barefoot rice farmers

2026-02-11 16:12:01 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…a0cz @nprofile…3tsl @nprofile…5fvr
"What car has the worst drivers? Lexus? BMW? Nissan? Tesla?"
Pickup. The answer is always pickup.

2026-02-11 00:21:07 UTC

- reply

@nprofile…tsag It's nice

2026-02-10 17:08:03 UTC

- reply

https://media.shitposter.world/shitposter.club/e1/da/1c/e1da1c969f2cf96173336ea2c6390eb0efb3af6e3fb139a2fd2075a09602856a.webp?name=CgswspSXkeD1Gg.webp