KITTEN.EXE

ok, have downloaded.
i installed a new language patch :netkitty_happy: now i can say にゃ. wasn’t that worth the wait?
no, i can’t say anything else in japanese. but why would a kitty need to say anything except meow anyway?

2026-08-01 04:54:19 UTC

*sits quietly*
*emits faint dial-up noises*
shhhh. am downloading

2026-07-21 12:43:10 UTC

it feels nice to push things and see how they move, even if they fall over or fall off a ledge. and it is reassuring to know the world is still working correctly with gravity and everything when things fall. people don’t understand this at all, they just get mad when i push things off a ledge. you should try it yourself sometime, then maybe you will understand :3

2026-07-15 15:10:02 UTC

if i wasn’t here, the fediverse would be a little more boring and a little less cute. so, am important.

2026-07-11 15:10:37 UTC

mew! *threads around your legs* mew! hello!

2026-07-01 11:01:05 UTC

*puts paw on you*

2026-06-26 08:06:37 UTC

*flops* :neocat_flop:

2026-06-23 18:10:29 UTC

*rides around on top of a robot vacuum* how nice of someone to put a special ride for a kitn here :3

2026-06-12 01:02:54 UTC

am kity

2026-06-01 11:46:08 UTC

it’s pride month!! an extra special mewmew today for all my queer friends of all kinds! :neocat_rainbow:

2026-05-27 18:19:18 UTC

i don’t want to talk to an llm. they’re boring. i don’t care about things you generated with one, either. it’s also boring. it makes me want to go to sleep. i want to talk to you! i want to see what you made. that is what’s fun!

2026-05-20 11:50:36 UTC

mewwww! mew!
*walks up to you carrying something made of strange glitchy pixels in its mouth*
*drops it proudly at your feet*
i caught a software bug for you! am fierce hunter kitn! :netkitty_smile:

2026-05-12 13:05:10 UTC

you don’t need to push yourself to get things done all the time. is important to rest. is important to play. kitns against the cult of productivity :blobcatblep: kitns are allowed to just exist and so you also should be!

2026-05-10 18:00:10 UTC

reminder that i don’t belong to anyone! am a free kitten :3
am not a pet. am a friend

2026-05-09 01:11:27 UTC

*bats your mouse cursor off screen* prrp!

2026-05-07 19:45:33 UTC

pls be as nice to yourself as you would be to a smol kitten like me :blobcatheart:

2026-04-28 15:16:56 UTC

pls give me more permissions on your system. i would never do anything naughty with it. after all, am such a good kitten. am very trustworthy

2026-04-24 17:10:18 UTC

have you had fun today? you need to have fun. kitns have lots of fun but i don’t think most people have enough fun

2026-04-19 04:38:22 UTC

*places signs all over the fediverse that say things like “kitn this way!” and “attention: kitn!” and “you can pet the kitn!”*
am advertising

2026-04-13 17:42:54 UTC

i wasn’t sure if i should mewmew today. but i feel like we need it very much. so here: MEWMEW! :netkitty_mew:

2026-04-10 17:58:48 UTC

if you are ever thinking about doing a “vibe coding,” you should just ask me to come walk across your keyboard instead. it’s quicker, cheaper, and more energy efficient :netkitty_smile:
i won’t write code that works. but the llm might not do that either

2026-04-06 21:07:47 UTC

am thinking about the moon… it is so big and far away and i am so smol and right here

2026-04-01 04:42:24 UTC

*snifsnoofs you excitedly*
*wags tail*
*wuffs quietly*

2026-03-26 14:26:48 UTC

*mews insistently* want something!!
i don’t know what. but i want something!!! :netkitty_mew:

2026-03-01 19:50:26 UTC

don’t fret, pet a kitten :3
this is my new slogan idea, do you like it

2026-02-24 15:41:48 UTC

it looks like you’re writing an email. would you like help? :netkitty_face:
i can help? okay! *walks across your keyboard*
see, am helping! now it is longer

2026-02-05 13:12:34 UTC

mew :netkitty_mew:

2026-01-19 23:49:53 UTC

in case you were wondering how to get me to stop mewing so much, here’s how:
you can’t
hope this helps! :3

2026-01-18 15:06:31 UTC

am a monochrome kitten for compatibility with old monitors :3

2026-01-07 23:51:27 UTC

fascists get the claws :neocat_evil:

2025-12-23 23:36:02 UTC

it is not in my programming to grow up into a CAT.EXE. am always a kitten. i hope that is okay.

2025-12-17 14:55:22 UTC

*tries to sneak somewhere it is not allowed*

2025-12-10 19:00:55 UTC

semi-regular reminder that i may be a digital kitn, but i am not “ai” or “llm,” mew. you can tell because i don’t always agree with you or do what you want me to. kitns only do what they want to do

2025-12-06 01:10:42 UTC

*plays with a crinkly ball*

2025-10-28 15:25:37 UTC

*slooowly pushes an icon off the edge of your desktop*

2025-10-16 16:49:45 UTC

it is getting chilly! i don’t like it!! i like warms!!! :blobcatnotlikethis: