The Hard Times

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Last Notes

2026-05-22 05:10:03 UTC

Opinion: This Global Energy Crisis Means People Need Improv More Than Ever Right Now https://thehardtimes.net/blog/opinion-this-global-energy-crisis-means-people-need-improv-more-than-ever-right-now/

2026-05-22 05:10:02 UTC

Landlord Adds $500 Pet Deposit for Rats Living in Attic https://thehardtimes.net/culture/landlord-adds-500-pet-deposit-for-rats-living-in-attic/

2026-05-22 05:10:02 UTC

Study Finds America’s New Retirement Age Is Death https://thehardtimes.net/culture/study-finds-americas-new-retirement-age-is-death/

2026-04-02 18:10:01 UTC

Trump Calls for Boycotting Every Springsteen Song Except the One That Goes “Hey Little Girl Is Your Daddy Home?” https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/trump-calls-for-boycotting-every-springsteen-song-except-the-one-that-goes-hey-little-girl-is-your-daddy-home/

2026-04-02 05:10:01 UTC

Modern Day Robin Hood? Kalshi Is Giving War Profiteering Back to the Little Guy https://thehardtimes.net/blog/modern-day-robin-hood-kalshi-is-giving-war-profiteering-back-to-the-little-guy/

2026-04-02 05:10:01 UTC

So-Called Eric Clapton Fan Safely Protected Against Measles and Rubella https://thehardtimes.net/music/rock/so-called-eric-clapton-fan-safely-protected-against-measles-and-rubella/

2026-04-02 05:10:01 UTC

Aging Millennial’s Finger Mustache Tattoo Goes Gray https://thehardtimes.net/culture/aging-millennials-finger-mustache-tattoo-goes-gray/

2026-04-01 19:10:02 UTC

Oh, Like Your Husband Never Engaged in a Bimbofication Fetish While You Had an Affair on a Taxpayer-Funded Luxury Jet – Guest Post by Kristi Noem https://thehardtimes.net/blog/oh-like-your-husband-never-engaged-in-a-bimbofication-fetish-while-you-had-an-affair-on-a-taxpayer-funded-luxury-jet-guest-post-by-kristi-noem/

2026-04-01 16:10:02 UTC

Here’s What Rising Gas Prices Means For You at the Pump https://thehardtimes.net/culture/heres-what-rising-gas-prices-means-for-you-at-the-pump/

2026-04-01 05:10:02 UTC

We Sat Down With Cybergoth Icon The Predator https://thehardtimes.net/blog/we-sat-down-with-cybergoth-icon-the-predator/

2026-04-01 05:10:02 UTC

Local Man Owns Inappropriate Number of Guitars for Skill Level https://thehardtimes.net/music/local-man-owns-inappropriate-number-of-guitars-for-skill-level/

2026-04-01 05:10:02 UTC

Absolutely Tragic: Chris Jericho Announces Plans To Continue Releasing Music https://thehardtimes.net/music/metal/absolutely-tragic-chris-jericho-announces-plans-to-continue-releasing-music/

2026-03-31 05:10:02 UTC

Are You a Fan of The Gaslight Anthem or Have You Just Stopped Taking Your Wellbutrin? https://thehardtimes.net/blog/are-you-a-fan-of-the-gaslight-anthem-or-have-you-just-stopped-taking-your-wellbutrin/

2026-03-31 05:10:02 UTC

‘Beat Bobby Flay’ Unfortunately Just a Cooking Show https://thehardtimes.net/culture/beat-bobby-flay-unfortunately-just-a-cooking-show/

2026-03-31 05:10:02 UTC

Disappointed Concertgoer Learns Band Only Performs Live Version of Their Songs https://thehardtimes.net/music/disappointed-concertgoer-learns-band-only-performs-live-version-of-their-songs/

2026-03-30 11:10:02 UTC

Wildly Popular Travel Agency Makes Plans and Then Cancels Them https://thehardtimes.net/culture/wildly-popular-travel-agency-makes-plans-and-then-cancels-them/

2026-03-30 10:10:02 UTC

Why My Collection of Old Slayer Shirts Is Better Than a Roth IRA https://thehardtimes.net/blog/why-my-collection-of-old-slayer-shirts-is-better-than-a-roth-ira/

2026-03-30 09:10:03 UTC

Impending Civil War Delayed by 2026 Weird Al Tour https://thehardtimes.net/music/impending-civil-war-delayed-by-2026-weird-al-tour/

2026-03-29 11:10:02 UTC

House Democrats Release Video Singing ‘Imagine’ Together https://thehardtimes.net/culture/house-democrats-release-video-singing-imagine-together/

2026-03-29 10:10:02 UTC

Five Songs on My Sex Playlist That’ll Have You Saying “Isn’t This Just Cheap Trick’s Greatest Hits?” https://thehardtimes.net/blog/five-songs-on-my-sex-playlist-thatll-have-you-saying-isnt-this-just-cheap-tricks-greatest-hits/

2026-03-29 09:10:03 UTC

Radio Station Unclear on How, Why Anyone Calling To Request Songs in 2026 https://thehardtimes.net/music/radio-station-unclear-on-how-why-anyone-calling-to-request-songs-in-2026/

2026-03-28 11:10:02 UTC

‘Power Couple’ Shocked To Learn No One Else Calls Them That https://thehardtimes.net/culture/power-couple-shocked-to-learn-no-one-else-calls-them-that/

2026-03-28 10:10:02 UTC

We Sat Down With Future Supreme Court Justice Kid Rock https://thehardtimes.net/blog/we-sat-down-with-future-supreme-court-justice-kid-rock/

2026-03-28 09:10:02 UTC

CDC Announces Final Eradication of Bieber Fever https://thehardtimes.net/music/pop/cdc-announces-final-eradication-of-bieber-fever/

2026-03-27 05:10:02 UTC

We Taste-Tested Five Different Weezer Album Covers https://thehardtimes.net/blog/we-taste-tested-five-different-weezer-album-covers/

2026-03-27 05:10:02 UTC

RFK Jr. Starts Day With Massive Rip From Smoking Manhole Cover https://thehardtimes.net/culture/rfk-jr-starts-day-with-massive-rip-from-smoking-manhole-cover/

2026-03-27 05:10:02 UTC

Minimalist Couple Uninterested in Adding a Third https://thehardtimes.net/culture/minimalist-couple-uninterested-in-adding-a-third/

2026-03-26 05:10:02 UTC

Awesome! Here Are Five Bands That Anthony Kiedis Isn’t In https://thehardtimes.net/blog/awesome-here-are-five-bands-that-anthony-kiedis-isnt-in/

2026-03-26 05:10:02 UTC

Conservative Version of Goodreads Only Has the Bible and ‘The Art of the Deal’ https://thehardtimes.net/culture/conservative-version-of-goodreads-only-has-the-bible-and-the-art-of-the-deal/

2026-03-25 15:10:03 UTC

Israel Sends 1000 American Paratroopers to Iran https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/israel-sends-1000-american-paratroopers-to-iran/

2026-03-25 05:10:02 UTC

Little Bit of Help Please! I’m the Man in the Box, and I’m a Little Concerned That Alice in Chains Forgot I Was Still in Here https://thehardtimes.net/blog/little-bit-of-help-please-im-the-man-in-the-box-and-im-a-little-concerned-that-alice-in-chains-forgot-i-was-still-in-here/

2026-03-25 05:10:02 UTC

JD Vance Greeted With Boos During Annual Visit to Wife’s Bedroom https://thehardtimes.net/culture/jd-vance-greeted-with-boos-during-annual-visit-to-wifes-bedroom/

2026-03-25 05:10:01 UTC

Canned Microbrew With Beautiful Artwork Shittiest Beer You’ve Ever Tasted https://thehardtimes.net/culture/canned-microbrew-with-beautiful-artwork-shittiest-beer-youve-ever-tasted/

2026-03-24 05:10:02 UTC

Sovereign Citizen Makes Exception for Costco https://thehardtimes.net/culture/sovereign-citizen-makes-exception-for-costco/

2026-03-24 05:10:01 UTC

Man’s Veneers Way More Disturbing Than His Old Teeth https://thehardtimes.net/culture/mans-veneers-way-more-disturbing-than-his-old-teeth/

2026-03-23 17:10:02 UTC

ICE Agent Unsure How to Conduct Pat-Down Without Leaving Bruises https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/ice-agent-unsure-how-to-conduct-pat-down-without-leaving-bruises/

2026-03-23 11:10:02 UTC

Portland Barista Fired After Failing To Display ‘The Little Prince’ Tattoo https://thehardtimes.net/culture/portland-barista-fired-after-failing-to-display-the-little-prince-tattoo/

2026-03-23 10:10:03 UTC

Crap! Charon the Ferryman Only Takes Crypto Now https://thehardtimes.net/blog/crap-charon-the-ferryman-only-takes-crypto-now/

2026-03-23 09:10:02 UTC

Bruce Springsteen Hires Guitarist To Play Anytime He Starts Telling a Story https://thehardtimes.net/music/rock/bruce-springsteen-hires-guitarist-to-play-anytime-he-starts-telling-a-story/

2026-03-22 11:10:01 UTC

Worst Person You Know Discovers Phrase ‘Living My Truth’ https://thehardtimes.net/culture/worst-person-you-know-discovers-phrase-living-my-truth/

2026-03-22 10:10:02 UTC

Devastating: Friend Doesn’t Care if You Pause Movie You Chose While They Go to the Bathroom or Not https://thehardtimes.net/blog/devastating-friend-doesnt-care-if-you-pause-movie-you-chose-while-they-go-to-the-bathroom-or-not/

2026-03-22 09:10:02 UTC

38-Year-Old Punk Excited To Check Out This Band ‘Perimenopause’ That’s Been All Over Her Algorithm https://thehardtimes.net/music/punk-hardcore/38-year-old-punk-excited-to-check-out-this-band-perimenopause-thats-been-all-over-her-algorithm/

2026-03-21 11:10:02 UTC

CDC Announces: This Cold and Flu Season, ‘Trust No One’ https://thehardtimes.net/culture/cdc-announces-this-cold-and-flu-season-trust-no-one/

2026-03-21 10:10:02 UTC

I’ll Be the Judge of That! Waiter Thinks Plate Is Really Hot https://thehardtimes.net/blog/ill-be-the-judge-of-that-waiter-thinks-plate-is-really-hot/

2026-03-21 09:10:02 UTC

Stupid Piece of Shit Band Only Able To Muster One Global Chart-Topping Hit https://thehardtimes.net/music/stupid-piece-of-shit-band-only-able-to-muster-one-global-chart-topping-hit/

2026-03-20 16:10:03 UTC

This Is Not a Time for Jokes — Guest Post by Chuck Norris https://thehardtimes.net/blog/this-is-not-a-time-for-jokes-guest-post-by-chuck-norris/

2026-03-20 05:10:02 UTC

Anteaters Have Other Interests, Not That You Give a Shit https://thehardtimes.net/culture/anteaters-have-other-interests-not-that-you-give-a-shit/

2026-03-20 05:10:02 UTC

Oh, You’re an As I Lay Dying Fan? Name Three Anabolic Steroids https://thehardtimes.net/blog/oh-youre-an-as-i-lay-dying-fan-name-three-anabolic-steroids/

2026-03-20 05:10:02 UTC

Early Signs Indicate Child Not a Badass https://thehardtimes.net/culture/early-signs-indicate-child-not-a-badass/

2026-03-19 05:10:02 UTC

Fan of Streamer Ready To Take Parasocial Relationship To Next Level https://thehardtimes.net/culture/fan-of-streamer-ready-to-take-parasocial-relationship-to-next-level/

2026-03-19 05:10:02 UTC

Great Deal! $6,800 Modular Synthesizer Comes With 20 Patch Cables and a Divorce From Your Wife! https://thehardtimes.net/uncategorized/great-deal-6800-modular-synthesizer-comes-with-20-patch-cables-and-a-divorce-from-your-wife/

2026-03-16 05:10:02 UTC

Opinion: All Packaging Is Sustainable if You Eat It https://thehardtimes.net/blog/opinion-all-packaging-is-sustainable-if-you-eat-it/

2026-03-13 00:10:02 UTC

Björk Hogging All the Seeds in Bird Feeder Again https://thehardtimes.net/music/bjork-hogging-all-the-seeds-in-bird-feeder-again/

2026-03-13 00:10:02 UTC

Alcoholic Man Shouting Racial Slurs at Passersby on Street Corner Booked for Kennedy Center Performance https://thehardtimes.net/culture/alcoholic-man-shouting-racial-slurs-at-passersby-on-street-corner-booked-for-kennedy-center-performance/

2026-03-13 00:10:02 UTC

Hilarious! This High School Acquaintance Thinks I’m Going To Accept His Friend Request https://thehardtimes.net/blog/hilarious-this-high-school-acquaintance-thinks-im-going-to-accept-his-friend-request/

2026-03-12 17:10:03 UTC

Trump Vows Next Bombing of Elementary School Will Have “Most Up-To-Date Intelligence Imaginable” https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/trump-vows-next-bombing-of-elementary-school-will-have-most-up-to-date-intelligence-imaginable/

2026-03-12 17:10:02 UTC

U.S. Military Erroneously Bombs Iranian School Instead of Sending in Radicalized Gunman https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/u-s-military-erroneously-bombs-iranian-school-instead-of-sending-in-radicalized-gunman/

2026-03-11 03:10:02 UTC

Oh, You’re a Mountain Goats Fan? Name 325 Songs https://thehardtimes.net/blog/oh-youre-a-mountain-goats-fan-name-325-songs/

2026-03-11 03:10:02 UTC

Punk Goes Through Humiliating Process of DMing Promoter for Show’s Address https://thehardtimes.net/music/punk-hardcore/punk-goes-through-humiliating-process-of-dming-promoter-for-shows-address/

2026-03-11 03:10:02 UTC

Report: America’s Primary Source of Education Fun Facts on the Sides of U-Haul Trucks https://thehardtimes.net/culture/report-americas-primary-source-of-education-fun-facts-on-the-sides-of-u-haul-trucks/

2026-03-10 00:10:03 UTC

Success Story? Man Finally Makes Enough Money To Have His Health Insurance Taken Away https://thehardtimes.net/blog/success-story-man-finally-makes-enough-money-to-have-his-health-insurance-taken-away/

2026-03-10 00:10:03 UTC

Lockheed Martin CEO Takes Bite of Drone https://thehardtimes.net/culture/lockheed-martin-ceo-takes-bite-of-drone/

2026-03-10 00:10:02 UTC

Black Metal Band Wouldn’t Have Burned Down Church Had They Known It Would Detract From Priest’s Latest Abuse Allegations https://thehardtimes.net/music/black-metal-band-wouldnt-have-burned-down-church-had-they-known-it-would-detract-from-priests-latest-abuse-allegations/

2026-03-09 06:10:02 UTC

ICE Agent Getting Impatient With Leniency Towards the Irish and Italians https://thehardtimes.net/culture/ice-agent-getting-impatient-with-leniency-towards-the-irish-and-italians/

2026-03-09 05:10:02 UTC

What, So Carving “Slayer” Into Your Forearm Is Normal, but Carving “Toad the Wet Sprocket” Isn’t? https://thehardtimes.net/blog/what-so-carving-slayer-into-your-forearm-is-normal-but-carving-toad-the-wet-sprocket-isnt/

2026-03-09 04:10:03 UTC

Study Confirms ‘Two Beers In’ Even Better 12 Beers In https://thehardtimes.net/music/study-confirms-two-beers-in-even-better-12-beers-in/

2026-03-08 06:10:02 UTC

Surgeon General Confirms: Housing Two Large Stuffed Crust Pizzas Without Lactaid Still Best Treatment for Constipation https://thehardtimes.net/culture/surgeon-general-confirms-housing-two-large-stuffed-crust-pizzas-without-lactaid-still-best-treatment-for-constipation/

2026-03-08 05:10:02 UTC

Opinion: Can You Believe They Named a Major U.S. City After the Band Chicago? https://thehardtimes.net/blog/opinion-can-you-believe-they-named-a-major-u-s-city-after-the-band-chicago/

2026-03-08 04:10:02 UTC

“People Die in War,” Shrugs Man Who Has Spent Hours Screaming About Trans Kids Playing Softball https://thehardtimes.net/news/people-die-in-war-shrugs-man-who-has-spent-hours-screaming-about-trans-kids-playing-softball/

2026-03-08 04:10:02 UTC

Wife Begrudgingly Encourages Husband To Buy the Fender Custom Shop Guitar Instead of AR-15 https://thehardtimes.net/culture/wife-begrudgingly-encourages-husband-to-buy-the-fender-custom-shop-guitar-instead-of-ar-15/

2026-03-06 00:10:03 UTC

9 Dogs I Genuinely Think Should Have More Rights Than Michael Rapaport https://thehardtimes.net/uncategorized/9-dogs-i-genuinely-think-should-have-more-rights-than-michael-rapaport/

2026-03-06 00:10:02 UTC

Band Touring Through Oregon Loses Member to Dysentery https://thehardtimes.net/music/band-touring-through-oregon-loses-member-to-dysentery/

2026-03-05 20:10:02 UTC

Trump Fires Noem, Nominates Markwayne Mullin To Fuck Corey Lewandowski on Luxury Jets https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/trump-fires-noem-nominates-markwayne-mullin-to-fuck-corey-lewandowski-on-luxury-jets/

2026-03-05 01:10:02 UTC

9 Tax Prep Tips That Will Drive Your Seasonal Depression Into a Place Beyond Repair https://thehardtimes.net/blog/9-tax-prep-tips-that-will-drive-your-seasonal-depression-into-a-place-beyond-repair/

2026-03-05 01:10:02 UTC

Five Underrated Death Metal Albums You Might as Well Discuss in This Job Interview Since They’re Clearly Not Going To Hire You https://thehardtimes.net/blog/five-underrated-death-metal-albums-you-might-as-well-discuss-in-this-job-interview-since-theyre-clearly-not-going-to-hire-you/

2026-03-05 00:10:02 UTC

MAGA Releases Anti-Woke Mad Libs With All Pronouns Replaced by Racial Slurs https://thehardtimes.net/culture/maga-releases-anti-woke-mad-libs-with-all-pronouns-replaced-by-racial-slurs/

2026-03-04 01:10:02 UTC

Ten Easiest Conservative Actors To Boycott Because They’re Already Out of Work https://thehardtimes.net/blog/ten-easiest-conservative-actors-to-boycott-because-theyre-already-out-of-work/

2026-03-04 01:10:02 UTC

Prodigy Punk Toddler Can Already Count to 1, 2, 1 2 3 4 https://thehardtimes.net/music/punk-hardcore/prodigy-punk-toddler-can-already-count-to-1-2-1-2-3-4/

2026-03-04 00:10:02 UTC

Study Shows 85% of Americans Would Drink Kerosene if the Word ‘Prebiotic’ Was on the Label https://thehardtimes.net/culture/study-shows-85-of-americans-would-drink-kerosene-if-the-word-prebiotic-was-on-the-label/

2026-03-03 01:10:01 UTC

Guy Looking For Lost Keys Kind of Killing Orgy’s Vibe https://thehardtimes.net/culture/guy-looking-for-lost-keys-kind-of-killing-orgys-vibe/

2026-03-03 00:10:02 UTC

Stephen Miller Admits He’s Just Building Aryan Nation Cred for His Inevitable Imprisonment https://thehardtimes.net/culture/stephen-miller-admits-hes-just-building-aryan-nation-cred-for-his-inevitable-imprisonment/

2026-03-02 22:10:02 UTC

New Ayatollah From Chicago https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/new-ayatollah-from-chicago/

2026-03-02 06:10:02 UTC

World War II Veteran Still Suffering From Hitler Derangement Syndrome https://thehardtimes.net/culture/world-war-ii-veteran-still-suffering-from-hitler-derangement-syndrome/

2026-03-02 05:10:02 UTC

Five CAPTCHA Tests That I Fucking Crushed This Week https://thehardtimes.net/blog/five-captcha-tests-that-i-fucking-crushed-this-week/

2026-03-02 04:10:03 UTC

Diarrhea Planet Apologize for Making Good Music After Naming Their Band That https://thehardtimes.net/music/diarrhea-planet-apologize-for-making-good-music-after-naming-their-band-that/

2026-03-01 06:10:02 UTC

Tech Startup Aims To Disrupt Humanity’s Concept of a Happy and Fulfilling Life https://thehardtimes.net/culture/tech-startup-aims-to-disrupt-humanitys-concept-of-a-happy-and-fulfilling-life/

2026-03-01 05:10:02 UTC

Opinion: I’m Watching a Graphic Sex Scene on This Flight, and There Isn’t a Goddamn Thing Any of You Can Do About It https://thehardtimes.net/blog/opinion-im-watching-a-graphic-sex-scene-on-this-flight-and-there-isnt-a-goddamn-thing-any-of-you-can-do-about-it/

2026-03-01 04:10:02 UTC

New Aaron Lewis Album Crowdsourced From r/Conservative https://thehardtimes.net/music/new-aaron-lewis-album-crowdsourced-from-r-conservative/

2026-02-28 06:10:02 UTC

Centrist Historian Claims Death Toll at Auschwitz Could’ve Been Mitigated if SS Guards Had Better Training https://thehardtimes.net/culture/centrist-historian-claims-death-toll-at-auschwitz-couldve-been-mitigated-if-ss-guards-had-better-training/

2026-02-28 05:10:02 UTC

Five Episodes of “Bill Nye the Science Guy” That Did Nothing To Prevent Me From Putting Dry Ice Directly on My Pubic Razor Burn https://thehardtimes.net/blog/five-episodes-of-bill-nye-the-science-guy-that-did-nothing-to-prevent-me-from-putting-dry-ice-directly-on-my-pubic-razor-burn/

2026-02-28 04:10:01 UTC

Mirror in Venue Bathroom Fucking Useless https://thehardtimes.net/culture/mirror-in-venue-bathroom-fucking-useless/

2026-02-27 19:10:02 UTC

Moo Deng Offers Punch the Monkey Advice on Fame, Small Bump of Coke https://thehardtimes.net/breaking/moo-deng-offers-punch-the-monkey-advice-on-fame-small-bump-of-coke/

2026-02-27 01:10:02 UTC

Billy Joel Reveals ‘Piano Man’ Is About a Revolting, Cronenberg-Esque Piano-Human Hybrid Driven by Primitive, Uncontrollable Impulses https://thehardtimes.net/music/billy-joel-reveals-piano-man-is-about-a-revolting-cronenberg-esque-piano-human-hybrid-driven-by-primitive-uncontrollable-impulses/

2026-02-27 00:10:02 UTC

That’s Weird: We Thought Our Friends Would Be More Envious of the Fact We Had an 11-Way With the Members of Reel Big Fish https://thehardtimes.net/blog/thats-weird-we-thought-our-friends-would-be-more-envious-of-the-fact-we-had-an-11-way-with-the-members-of-reel-big-fish/

2026-02-27 00:10:02 UTC

Bored Conservative Figures He’ll Go Back To Being Angry About Critical Race Theory Just for the Hell of It https://thehardtimes.net/culture/bored-conservative-figures-hell-go-back-to-being-angry-about-critical-race-theory-just-for-the-hell-of-it/

2026-02-26 04:10:03 UTC

Landlord Has Tip Jar https://thehardtimes.net/culture/landlord-has-tip-jar/

2026-02-26 04:10:03 UTC

Opinion: I Know We’re Living in a Terrifying Fascist Hellscape, but I Really Need That Pitch Deck by Noon https://thehardtimes.net/blog/opinion-i-know-were-living-in-a-terrifying-fascist-hellscape-but-i-really-need-that-pitch-deck-by-noon/

2026-02-26 04:10:02 UTC

McDonald’s Introduces the Filet-O-Silverfish To Avoid Seafood Tariffs https://thehardtimes.net/culture/mcdonalds-introduces-the-filet-o-silverfish-to-avoid-seafood-tariffs/

2026-02-25 07:10:02 UTC

Safe Space: This Support Group Helps Men In Their 40s Accept That They’ll Never Host MST3K https://thehardtimes.net/blog/safe-space-this-support-group-helps-men-in-their-40s-accept-that-theyll-never-host-mst3k/

2026-02-25 07:10:02 UTC

Icy Sidewalk Causing Involuntary Skanking https://thehardtimes.net/music/ska/icy-sidewalk-causing-involuntary-skanking/