ganbatte~! <333
quotingIn high school I was manipulated into joining long distance track. I was failing biology, and my soccer coach was my biology teacher, so she made a deal with me that if I joined long distance track then she'd give me extra credit.
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I HATE running. It's been a punishment ever since I was little. But I did it and passed biology.
I found that almost every long race, I'd end up just crying near the end. Nothing was wrong emotionally, just I could see the end and felt myself running out of endurance and had to just push through.
"You can run while crying!" Is what my coach would be yelling at me through that last part. Later on when I'd cry during biology problems that were stumping me she'd say the same thing, "you can do science while crying!"
It became a motto of sorts. I made it through grad school telling myself "you can do math while crying!"
Today I find I'm feeling very frayed, and it's because I can see that end coming. I'm almost there. I'm just super tired. I haven't had a kitchen in over a month and it's really lame, I miss baking. Today instead of eating more canned soup I just wanted to order a pizza but all the pizza places in this town are closed Mondays and now I'm sobbing.
First world problems for sure, but I know I'm not crying over the pizza. It's because I'm so so close to the end of this adventure. I'm going to have a kitchen again in two weeks. I'm going to be able to make healthy cheaper comfort food very soon. I'm almost there!
I'm really glad that I uprooted my life instead of just letting myself stay in a place I was unhappy because it was safe. I'm really glad I'm the type of person who can push through doing hard uncomfortable things even when I'm crying 😭
Thank you Ms. Sheldon for teaching me to continue taking action even when I'm crying. You were a really wonderful influence on me and a huge part of why I've been able to do as many cool things as I've done 🥰