Just come into work every day, but wear really ugly sweaters.
And wait until they say something.
Then, do everything really really loudly.
HI FRANK!!! HOW ARE YOU DOING TODAY??? ARE YOU ALLERGIC TO FISH??? I HAVE A FISH IN MY FREEZER, SO IF YOU COME TO MY HOUSE AND ARE ALLERGIC TO FISH, DON'T TOUCH THE FISH IN MY FREEZER!!!
Uh, yeah, I'll remember that....
GOOD! BECAUSE I ALSO HAVE STRAWBERRIES IN THE CRISPER, AND I...
Ok, ok, I'll stay out of your fridge, at your house, that I've never been to, and have no reason to go to.....
I LIKE COLD PILLOWS! A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK I'M WEIRD FOR SOAKING MY PILLOW IN COLD MILK BEFORE BED, BUT MY BONES NEED THE CALCIUM!!!
Uhhhh......what?
Aaaaaaaaaand, just repeat this behavior for a year or two. They will have no reason to fire you as long as you're loud, annoying, and borderline stupid, but they'll really want you gone.
I figure, if they're going to take away the comforts of your home, then you should take away their comfort of you being at home.
You can also add in smelly to the mix. Just shit your pants in front of your boss. Tell him you have no time for toilets. Make sure you don't wear underwear, so it plops right onto his office floor.
If you really want to mix it up, I've had varying levels of sucsess by adding crazy into the mix. Not like violent aggressive crazy. More like eating a brownie while standing on the ceiling and defying gravity kinds of crazy.
Lost_My_Mind
npub1cv…0c3nx
2026-05-08 02:12:27 UTC
in reply to nevent1q…tmzz
Author Public Key
npub1cvrxxjmmdw2f00du68q73q7shjg23xtksr4knxwhrqa4muhxj82sj0c3nxSeen on
wss://relay.momostr.pinkPublished at
2026-05-08 02:12:27 UTCEvent JSON
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