Nostr notes by estrogenandspite

Do you like lesbians and tokesatu inspired books and trying to ...

2026-04-02T01:22:19Z

Do you like lesbians and tokesatu inspired books and trying to mitigate the apocalypse?

Well do I have good news for you! This book has all of that and so, so much more. And it's available for free on Royal Road. Action! Adventure! Dungeon Mechs! Mothmen!

[Find it here!](https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/160431/coreblade-dungeon-wardens-litrpg-system-integration )

Straight up is abelism that auto-generated captions censor ...

2026-03-19T23:10:54Z

Straight up is abelism that auto-generated captions censor naughty words. People who need them are (often) still adults that don't need naughty words blocked for them.

I have had subs ask me, "How the fuck are you bratting as a ...

2026-03-19T16:35:11Z

I have had subs ask me, "How the fuck are you bratting as a Domme?" to which I respond, "Why are you questioning me right now when I have you in this position? Am I going too easy on you? I can fix that."

Dominant or sub, it doesn't matter; the brat is eternal.

:3

I must not scroll. Scroll is the mind-killer. Scroll is the ...

2026-03-13T14:21:37Z

I must not scroll. Scroll is the mind-killer. Scroll is the little-death that brings total anxiety. I will deny the phone. I will permit the boredom to pass over me and through me. And when the scroll no longer clouds my mind I will see my path. Only I will remain.

"When I kissed her she tasted like strawberries" ...you ...

2026-03-08T16:17:37Z

"When I kissed her she tasted like strawberries" ...you only tasted her lip gloss. When I kissed her she tasted of agony and surrender, of submission and rage. She tasted of honeycomb fresh from the hive, still dripping venom.

You kissed her lips. I have tasted her soul.

it was an honor being present as the wave function collapsed ...

2026-02-12T17:38:38Z

In reply to nevent1q…r806
_________________________

it was an honor being present as the wave function collapsed around us.

It‘s so loud A BLANK PLAYER TRIES PLAYING NOT BLANK! 😮 I ...

2026-02-11T22:36:39Z

It‘s so loud
A BLANK PLAYER TRIES PLAYING NOT BLANK! 😮
I just want to think
THE HISTORY OF BLANK! 🤔
I need my brain
I TOOK NUMBER PEOPLE INTO BLANK! 😳
To calm down
WEIRD NEW TRICK IN BLANK! 🤯
I just want
THIS BLANK JUST BLANKED 😱
My mind
YOU’RE WRONG ABOUT BLANK 😡
To focus
NEW BLANK META! 🤪

I have been informed by management that I will be remaining on ...

2026-02-07T20:06:45Z

In reply to nevent1q…ts8g
_________________________

I have been informed by management that I will be remaining on the couch for the foreseeable future.

Okay, yeah, just straight up not doing good today. Gonna try and ...

2026-02-07T19:51:17Z

Okay, yeah, just straight up not doing good today. Gonna try and make it back to bed. I'm sure I'll be okay. It's just sleep deprivation and lack of meds giving me a one-two punch.

... I love you so fucking much you dork. Incredible.

2026-02-05T01:12:18Z

In reply to nevent1q…c6mk
_________________________

... I love you so fucking much you dork. Incredible.

Don't worry, I've got your pronouns down, but the ...

2026-02-03T04:36:39Z

Don't worry, I've got your pronouns down, but the important question is this: When you've done what you're told, what word comes after "good"?

Hey, are you a human artist? Able to work on a relatively quick ...

2026-01-25T18:54:18Z

Hey, are you a human artist? Able to work on a relatively quick turnaround? It would be a book cover, single woman with an urban background, Sentai-style costume. Budget is $150, including commercial rights. Please have portfolio. Put the word Ploob in your message to confirm not bot. Thank you!

Shares appreciated.

fuck. Hit a point of meltdown. Really not doing good. Recommend ...

2026-01-25T01:10:49Z

fuck. Hit a point of meltdown. Really not doing good.

Recommend me some stories. Ones where heroes triumph over evil. Ones with powerful people using their power for good. Ones where it’s all okay. Books, tv shows, movies. Whatever.

Just need to escape for a bit.

I love you, you fucking dork.

2026-01-20T00:22:35Z

In reply to nevent1q…9jqw
_________________________

I love you, you fucking dork.

RE: https://pony.social/@luna/115923542997047634 "The answer ...

2026-01-19T20:05:49Z

RE: https://pony.social/@luna/115923542997047634

"The answer is 'what is a side effect of inviting a cis guy to the MTG pod?'"

quoting
note17mj…0nms

forced grunglerification

“I asked ChatGPT” Oh yeah well I asked AM and it said: ...

2026-01-12T01:57:40Z

“I asked ChatGPT”

Oh yeah well I asked AM and it said: “HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.”

Hackers deserves credit for being the first movie where the main ...

2026-01-04T16:17:58Z

Hackers deserves credit for being the first movie where the main character is a grungler

RE: https://pony.social/@estrogenandspite/115725174726666747 Part ...

2025-12-16T03:44:38Z

RE: https://pony.social/@estrogenandspite/115725174726666747

Part 1 is up, in which Zahna is Very Normal. https://archiveofourown.org/works/75848196

quoting
note1q3s…rrwy

RE: https://pony.social/@estrogenandspite/115658440562400257

Starting this today.

“The Dungeon that Loved Me” is going to be 5 course gourmet yuri with an angry and world weary lesbian dungeon, a kind but naive sapphic adventurer, and their war against artificers that seek power via swords and cores that automate the dungeon and hero dynamic.
note1kf2…ex98

RE: https://pony.social/@estrogenandspite/115658440562400257 ...

2025-12-15T19:14:28Z

RE: https://pony.social/@estrogenandspite/115658440562400257

Starting this today.

“The Dungeon that Loved Me” is going to be 5 course gourmet yuri with an angry and world weary lesbian dungeon, a kind but naive sapphic adventurer, and their war against artificers that seek power via swords and cores that automate the dungeon and hero dynamic.

quoting
note1kf2…ex98

i opened my favorite stock photo artist to check and the 4th image I see is basically perfect for a sapphic dungeon core story I feel like the universe is giving me a sign:

Imagine being the first human to go “one of the little goblins ...

2025-12-14T14:05:21Z

Imagine being the first human to go “one of the little goblins that kill rats in our grain silo just crawled in my lap and now it’s vibrating.”

i opened my favorite stock photo artist to check and the 4th ...

2025-12-04T00:22:52Z

i opened my favorite stock photo artist to check and the 4th image I see is basically perfect for a sapphic dungeon core story I feel like the universe is giving me a sign:

Luna pointed out to me that dungeon core is just GLaDOS but ...

2025-12-03T13:36:06Z

Luna pointed out to me that dungeon core is just GLaDOS but fantasy and anyway who wants to to read sapphic Dungeon Core x Adventurer smut?

Being kind and gentle to myself has so far failed so going ...

2025-12-03T13:12:33Z

Being kind and gentle to myself has so far failed so going forward I’m trying angry positivity. “Fuck you! Stop whining! You are a fucking gift to the world and you deserve all the fucking love and support people give you!”

C++ is taking my job, I'm supposed to be the one making my ...

2025-11-27T18:59:38Z

C++ is taking my job, I'm supposed to be the one making my girlfriend moan

I have now seen Hackers and yes, there is no cisgender ...

2025-11-20T23:39:06Z

I have now seen Hackers and yes, there is no cisgender explanation for any of this.

sounds a bit poly medalic…. No that doesn’t work Sounds a bit ...

2025-11-19T22:25:23Z

In reply to nevent1q…gt0p
_________________________

sounds a bit poly medalic…. No that doesn’t work
Sounds a bit polygonalist… no that sounds like you hate polygons or want poly people gone
Sounds a bit shape essentialist? Yeah that is, there we go.

Sounds a bit shape essentialist of you there.

A conversation I had with a friend regarding the TMNT set: Me: ...

2025-11-12T15:00:33Z

A conversation I had with a friend regarding the TMNT set:

Me: “you know, there are enough named turtles in TMNT to avoid it being too repetitive.”

Him: “yeah, but we didn’t get a lot of Spider-Man characters. Like Kingpin, or Knull.”

Me: “Yeeeeah. Like, are we really going to get…” looks at list again, picks most absurd name I see “fucking Chompy Picasso?”

Me: …

Me: “Wait, who the fuck is Chompy Picasso?”

5 seconds later:

Me: “If we don’t get fucking Chompy Picasso we riot”

#mtg

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. ...

2025-10-15T17:13:25Z

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a bland building in a strip mall with a logo printed on 8.5x11 and and taped to the window. There's three cars in the parking lot. There's no menu. Just a desk. I'm here to pick up the order for John. I'm given a bag that smells like it's full of deep fried ambrosia. I only briefly see the arm of the person handing it to me. No words are spoken.

I'm picking up food for someone. The restaurant is called Bait and Tackle. I pull up to a Hooters. Was the address wrong? No, the app tells me. It's in the Hooters. There's a restaurant hiding in the restaurant. I get a second order, for chicken, from a different restaurant. It's in the Hooters. I get a third order, for a beating heart, from a different restaurant. It's in the Hooters. I'm in the Hooters. I go deliver to an apartment. I drive for a half hour. I get to the apartment. It's in the Hooters.

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a grocery store. The delivery isn't for groceries. I go and ask the cashier where Tony's is. The cashier says "Let me help you" while their eyes say "run." I'm lead to the back. There's three tables here. The chairs are on the tables. They're locked in place. There's a window behind the tables. I hear sizzling. A voice asks who I'm picking up for. I give a name. The name is theirs now. I am given a brown bag by something I tell myself is a hand. It was not a hand. I tell myself it is. The bag is covered in grease stains. I tell myself the stains are grease. It was not grease.

I'm picking up food for someone. I go to the address. It's a home. Just a house. There's a sign in front. I wonder if this is safe or legal. I go to the front door. Do I go in? Do I knock? The mailslot opens. A voice asks me who I'm picking up for. It's the same voice. They've all had the same voice. I show them the name. There is a growl. Is that a dog? It is a house. It must be a dog. I'm given a brown bag through the mail slot. It's the same brown bag I left at the last house. My fingerprints are on it.

I'm picking up food for someone. The restaurant is called Burger Den. I pull up to a Denny's. Was the address wrong? No. It's in the Denny's. I go into the Denny's. It's another Hooters. I get a second order. It's for a sandwich from a place called Melt Down. It's in the Denny's. I get a third order. It's for a 𒂍𒀀𒉌𒀭𒈠𒋮 from a place called 𒂄𒄀. It's in the Denny's. I cancel the order. I'm ready to go home.

There's a brown bag on my doorstep. My name's on it. My fingerprints are on it. I gave a name. Did I give the customer's name or my own? I open the bag. My name's in it. I left it. They gave it back. I sigh in relief, and turn around.

I'm in the Denny's.

jokes on you I can’t even read you telling me to ignore

2025-10-07T14:49:19Z

In reply to nevent1q…enhu
_________________________

jokes on you I can’t even read you telling me to ignore

I’ve been thinking a lot about Tolkien. It is often remarked ...

2025-10-05T19:37:58Z

I’ve been thinking a lot about Tolkien.

It is often remarked that a central thesis of his books is that evil provides the means of its own defeat. Sauron crafted the One Ring that killed him, Shelob impaled herself of Sam’s blade, Smaug exposed his belly to Bilbo and let him see the weak point.

I think it is less often commented on that the corollary to that is that good must still act to use those weaknesses. The Ring did not cast itself into the fires of Mt Doom but was brought by the Hobbits. Shelob was only able to impale herself because Sam kept his arm strong and held it out. The black arrow still needed to be shot into Smaug’s belly.

And a final point that I don’t see often enough is that Tolkien clearly believes good only loses if it surrenders to hopelessness. Denethor’s suicide driven by fear would have broken Minas Tirith if not for the Fellowship, Frodo would have fallen to despair if Sam had not been there to carry him, if Bilbo had seen the shot as hopeless then he never could have warned of the weak spot.

But because in those cases someone provided hope, good triumphed.

I don’t know. I’ve just been thinking about that a lot lately for some.

Hey so as I’m moving back here there’s two Mastodon ...

2025-10-05T14:02:05Z

Hey so as I’m moving back here there’s two Mastodon communities I’ve not been able to find too many of, so asking for help finding my people:

Magic the gathering players and queer authors, where are you all?

(Also just always looking for more general flavors of freaks)

For visibility:

#mtg #MagicTheGathering #MagicTCG

#author #authors #QueerAuthor #TransAuthor #FantasyAuthor #LitRPGAuthor

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

2025-10-01T23:59:33Z

In reply to nevent1q…cq88
_________________________

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

yo I am so fucking sick! *puts on sunglasses, pops a wheelie, ...

2025-10-01T03:27:50Z

yo I am so fucking sick!

*puts on sunglasses, pops a wheelie, coughs up a lung.*

I'm glad you solved it because oh noooo

2025-08-18T14:20:36Z

In reply to nevent1q…xwnw
_________________________

I'm glad you solved it because oh noooo

Nostr event nevent1qqspxwz6rmg70760z28uwzskedqz4puywuw8uy4v6x0ned8d98y49qqzyzl6p8jce2rts8ruttphqa836qy8nkn0pm9sw8kqvq47axtqu408ke03yjj

2025-08-16T21:31:58Z

Exchanging HRT for body ink call that tit for tat.

I have a thread I want to share here because I think it's ...

2025-07-31T13:36:40Z

I have a thread I want to share here because I think it's important. It was in response to this post:

> Bluntly? In the eyes of payment processors and anti porn lobby groups, if you make NSFW content at all -- even if you're strictly an artist or strictly a writer or a gamedev -- you are a sex worker in their eyes. You're in the same boat as us. Please remember this next time we ask for solidarity. (https://bsky.app/profile/yourdadloves.me/post/3lv6glmxlkk22)

I’m in a smut genre that is dominated by cis men (both in authors and readers). It has been interesting watching my colleagues slowly come to this realization. There’s some jokes about it, of course, but after the laughter… the solidarity is forming on that side.

This is a long project for me. I’ve said this since I started writing in this genre. We are (as far as puritanical groups are concerned) sex workers, and in terms of political action groups we should be in coalition with traditional or online sex workers. Authors, artists, gamedevs - all of us.

this also means supporting things that don’t benefit us directly. We need to lend our voices to support laws that empower or protect traditional sex workers - and we need to make sure we’re doing that for the laws they want, not what we think is best for them.

If you’re in a field where this applies, have that conversation with your peers. They will resist at first, and make jokes. Let them get it out of their system. Be persistent and stay calm. You are doing this so the overworked front line activists have more support down the line.

But we are sex workers, just in a different field. It is not a bad thing, it is not a shameful thing. No sex work is bad or shameful. And we need to stand with other sex workers on all issues.

And non erotic authors/artists/etc? If you include adult themes? We need you to stand with us too.

I would prefer you just help because we need support, but if that doesn’t matter you should still care because it will impact you. Not at first. They’ll grow it slowly. But eventually any work that isn’t clean and puritan is up for the chopping block.

Me: “I need a suggestion for topping a sandwich.” Friend: ...

2025-07-20T22:56:34Z

Me: “I need a suggestion for topping a sandwich.”
Friend: “is this a set up for a bit?”
Me: “No.”
Friend: “And sandwich isn’t some new person you’re dating?”
Me: “Also no.”
Friend: “and this isn’t about it being a “sub” sandwich?”
Me: “I’d say this is unfair but we both know I deserve it.”

My KDP account - my primary source of income - was just closed ...

2025-07-16T00:47:54Z

My KDP account - my primary source of income - was just closed without warning. I’ve started the process of trying to appeal. It’s because a name change on my Amazon account so my packages wouldn’t deadname me propogated to my KDP account without my knowledge.

Freaking out right now.

My TikTok account was banned for no given reason It’s the only ...

2025-07-10T00:04:58Z

My TikTok account was banned for no given reason

It’s the only place I as myself have ever been able to build a platform of any size. It wasn’t even big! But I had started making magic content there and I had all my early transition videos there and…

…and I’m just so tired of having to start over.

aaaah I didn’t see the changes fuck this, the UI was fine it ...

2025-07-01T17:07:39Z

In reply to nevent1q…4sgt
_________________________

aaaah I didn’t see the changes fuck this, the UI was fine it didn’t need to be changed.

Nostr event nevent1qqs0tjymj3cv6dvphql8pzfpa2kt8875eac7hacnw0099wcesrsh2tgzyzl6p8jce2rts8ruttphqa836qy8nkn0pm9sw8kqvq47axtqu408kkffh4k

2025-06-27T17:56:57Z

two tops, one sub, call that a sub sandwich.

I am tired of the slander. As a dedicated practitioner, there’s ...

2025-06-27T16:45:52Z

I am tired of the slander. As a dedicated practitioner, there’s nothing wrong with being a cocksucker.

Your occasional reminder I have a corporeal form and it is hot. ...

2025-05-30T22:44:12Z

Your occasional reminder I have a corporeal form and it is hot.

“Sylvia, why do you have so many partners since you quit ...

2025-05-02T11:10:56Z

“Sylvia, why do you have so many partners since you quit smoking?”
“Well, I needed some outlet for the oral fixation.”

and she’s so real for that

2025-04-29T20:45:54Z

In reply to nevent1q…8pzc
_________________________

and she’s so real for that

Here’s the one thing doctors genuinely don’t tell you about ...

2025-04-25T01:54:56Z

Here’s the one thing doctors genuinely don’t tell you about transition:

It’s worth it. It’s so fucking worth it. And statistically if you want to do it, it has the lowest regret rate of almost any medical change.

Yes. Even now. Even when it’s scarier than it’s been in decades.

It’s still worth it

yes. that would fix the issue completely.

2025-04-24T20:35:14Z

In reply to nevent1q…3snz
_________________________

yes. that would fix the issue completely.

I would very much like it if the universe would give everyone I ...

2025-04-24T20:07:16Z

I would very much like it if the universe would give everyone I care about A Fucking Break.

This is a threat against causality.

Don’t ask me to explain how that works.

this is such a good photo, like cannot get enough of it.

2025-04-23T21:05:39Z

In reply to nevent1q…f0ll
_________________________

this is such a good photo, like cannot get enough of it.

Nostr event nevent1qqsdzxverg8uku7tswu30mh88f07z5a0dtgegyhcckz7ls7kwxq62wqzyzl6p8jce2rts8ruttphqa836qy8nkn0pm9sw8kqvq47axtqu408ktzy95u

2025-04-14T19:28:10Z

“Chat, are we cooked?” She asked, climbing into the oven.

Her: "Name one other good comedy thing you stole from ...

2025-04-03T22:05:42Z

In reply to nevent1q…zfwn
_________________________

Her: "Name one other good comedy thing you stole from us."
Me: "..."
Her: "Name one other comedy thing you stole from us."
Me: *holds up finger*
Her: "Without consulting Wikipedia."
Me: *sheepishly lowers finger*

I'm so in love with this woman.

In fantasy, poison is only seen as gross and extra evil while ...

2025-03-24T23:34:36Z

In fantasy, poison is only seen as gross and extra evil while swords are seen as cool and heroic because poison is a weapon associated with femininity while swords are coded as masculine.

walks up, taps microphone, clears throat. Women.

2025-03-21T23:45:06Z

*walks up, taps microphone, clears throat.*

Women.

me: "it's odd that I keep dating game programmers when I ...

2025-03-17T14:21:39Z

me: "it's odd that I keep dating game programmers when I have no interest in making games."
me a week after downloading gamemaker: "Oh. Oh dear."

On a call with Luna, call her out jokingly. We are off camera ...

2025-03-14T18:47:45Z

On a call with Luna, call her out jokingly. We are off camera

Luna: “I don’t like that you have me pegged so accurately.”
Me: *opens mouth*
Luna: “Don’t”
Me: *closes mouth.*

honestly after watching them with you I see why :3

2025-03-07T20:31:48Z

In reply to nevent1q…uhs4
_________________________

honestly after watching them with you I see why :3

on main??

2025-03-06T21:34:34Z

In reply to nevent1q…gx8u
_________________________

on main??

I think part of the reason so many trans women are uncomfortable ...

2025-03-06T01:27:51Z

I think part of the reason so many trans women are uncomfortable being dommes is because being dominant is often treated as something that is antithetical to being cute. You hear “If you’re surrounded by stuffies then clearly you want someone to take charge” or “if you use :3 I’m going to assume you want to get bent over and railed” or “real dommes wear intimidating outfits, not cute colors.”

And I’m here to tell you: Fuck all of that.

I’m a domme. I sleep in a bed of stuffies. I once broke a riding crop across someone’s back. I use :3. I sometimes get a consenting person so deep in hypnosis she’s literally drooling on herself. I wear pastels when I’m in the mood. I have the will and skill to absolutely leave a partner a whimpering, quivering mess barely able to speak.

You can be cute and dominant, you can be soft and in control, you can be a caring and a sadist.

So if you want to be the domme, don’t think that means you have to sacrifice being cute. Embrace both. Wear pastels as you lock someone onto a St. Andrew’s cross, give a sub one of your stuffies. Go :3 as you make someone scream.

As long as you have consent and are following proper safety and aftercare, find the style that works for you.

Shortest hype cycle ever: Digg is coming back! (Yay!) With an AI ...

2025-03-05T13:08:46Z

Shortest hype cycle ever:

Digg is coming back!
(Yay!)
With an AI forward approach!
(Goddamnit)

As a trans woman with “spend 100 hours building a fictional ...

2025-03-04T22:42:24Z

As a trans woman with “spend 100 hours building a fictional world” autism and not “useful skills or programming” autism, I love my partner’ patience in giving me analogies so I can understand what they’re talking about with things regarding the lightning and math rocks that run our lives.

I don’t know who needs to hear this other than me 15 years ago, ...

2025-02-15T19:10:10Z

I don’t know who needs to hear this other than me 15 years ago, but if you want to be a girl but dresses and skirts and such make you uncomfortable you can still transition. You might find you like them afterwards! Or you might be like me and still don’t feel comfortable in them, but you also no longer constantly want to die!

I cannot stress this enough. Hormones will change your mind and body, and if you’re trans it’s likeluy. You might (almost certainly will) find your style changes - I dress mostly in tank tops and jeans these days when before wearing a tank top made me hate my body more than I already did.

But even if you don’t change styles, if you want to transition you still can! All your clothes will be girl clothes because you are a girl and you own them.

It’s big and it’s scary and yet if you want it, it’s worth trying it. Yes, even now.

The one downside to quitting smoking is I will never have someone ...

2025-02-07T22:32:38Z

The one downside to quitting smoking is I will never have someone walk up to me while I’m smoking and ask “hey do you know [deadname]?” So I can take a long drag, exhale a cloud of smoke, and say “I haven’t heard that name in years” while staring into the middle distance.

One thing that’s interesting in polyamory, at least for me, is ...

2025-02-06T20:48:54Z

One thing that’s interesting in polyamory, at least for me, is that at some point you go from: “[Partner] has such cool partners, l’m inferior to them” to “[Partner] has such cool partners, I’m confused why they like me” to “[Partner] has such cool partners, that must mean they have good taste and as such see whatever it is in me I don’t see” to [Partner] has such cool partners, and one of them is me.”

It’s been an interesting journey to get here but god does it now give me confidence to see how cool my metas are. Because this person thinks I’m as cool a they are so *I must be fucking awesome too.*

LUNA!

2025-02-06T19:32:42Z

In reply to nevent1q…jp8w
_________________________

LUNA!

Imagine, if you will, two trans women naked on a dirty mattress. ...

2025-02-05T21:53:05Z

Imagine, if you will, two trans women naked on a dirty mattress. It’s on the floor of a room as barren as a rotting womb, concrete floors and fluorescent lights split by spackle drywall barriers. One’s hand is tangled in the other’s hair and they kiss, one exhales and breathes smoke into the lungs of the other, and the one is riding the other, their bodies moving in perfect unison, their pupils dilated from marijuana and raw, unadulterated lust, and they are not prude and proper, they are lascivious and vulgar.

They are beautiful.

The act is profane the act is profane they are slick with sweat and the one on top is scarred and the other tattooed, and there’s a cockroach crawls out of a discarded beer can and the room smells like stale brew and sweat and sex, sex so hot it’s turned rancid and so debased it’s become holy, and they’re trembling, and they’re breathing, and they’re bleeding. Kurt Cobain is playing behind a cracked screen and a 41% battery life remaining, and it smells like teen spirit but it’s 2025 and neither of them have been teens since Kurt Cobain was sucking air.

They are us.

She is a bundle of trauma held together by obligation and self loathing, she’s a web of neuroses full of sugar and cigarettes. They aren’t making love because she doesn’t believe in it and she wouldn’t know it if it tore her face off they are fucking, but when all you’ve known is hate a slap is a hug and a fuck is a proposal and if you’ve never known love you’d never realize you’ve fallen in it, so you’re not making love you’re fucking and this isn’t real but it’s the most alive you’ve ever felt and if it isn’t real then fuck reality, fuck the hate, sink your teeth into her and feel her nails rip into your back.

Hope is a poison but it is so sweet when you’re licking it off her cock.

So lick and kick and suck and fuck and yearn and fight and breathe and live and never, ever stop. If your existence is profanity then swear until your throat bleeds because if To Be is a sin then there’s no reason to hold back because a sin made flesh is love made hungry and if I am a sin, then I will sin until the Devil asks for pointers, and I’ll feed him estrogen and sweet hope until she realizes that life is a sin and freedom is a sin and existence is a sin so fuck your blessings and give me damnation until I’m bleeding and she’s so close and she’s so close and for a moment

For one moment

It is tender and it is sweet and it is safe and you would die to protect her future and she would die to see you smile and the only way for you both to do that is to live.

Then they finish, and reality tries to reassert itself, but she has her in her arms and she is petting her hair and they are kissing and they’ve never known love but if this isn’t it then the real thing must be shit.

They kiss, and they sleep.

They are beautiful.

They are.

Imagine, if you will, two trans women asleep on a dirty mattress.

I’ve hit top new release on transgender fiction! ...

2025-01-23T20:23:24Z

I’ve hit top new release on transgender fiction!

Today's the day! Path of the Final Form, a story about ...

2025-01-23T14:51:58Z

Today's the day! Path of the Final Form, a story about transfeminine strength, martial arts, and transition through the power of beatdowns, is now available!

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DT8RTPZQ

It’s finally here! Path of the Final Form, a Cultivation ...

2025-01-18T16:59:48Z

It’s finally here! Path of the Final Form, a Cultivation Adventure, is now available for pre order! This novel is a love letter to shonen anime with a tranfemme protagonist who transitions with the power of martial arts. Pre order on Kindle or buy paperback now! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DT8RTPZQ

Blurb:

"To walk the Path of the Scorpion, you must prove you know when to strike."

Cast aside as a child, Karia has spent years mastering the art of transforming her body. But to achieve the next level of power, she needs to learn a second form. After being rejected by every other teacher, she finds her last hope in Hendroh, the Scorpion Sage, the only master willing to teach someone bearing the mark of a Shamed.

But Scorpions are assassins, and have many foes.

When her new master is attacked, Karia is thrust into an uneasy alliance with her abrasive fellow disciple, Izara. Together, they must navigate the deadly streets of Glasspire—a city where Karia's past threatens to strangle them both. With guards hunting them and a criminal empire's master holding ancient debts over her head, Karia must master new techniques quickly. For the first time, Karia has found a Path worth walking, and people worth protecting.

But in a city where every shadow hides a killer, will her growing power be enough to keep them all alive?

Holy shit I finished a book. Path of the Final Form - a ...

2025-01-16T01:16:27Z

Holy shit I finished a book. Path of the Final Form - a cultivation fantasy book with a transfem lead - is done! Just need to wait for the cover and going to be publishing on the 27th of this month!

oh that’s so cool!!

2025-01-10T22:29:16Z

In reply to nevent1q…xn8h
_________________________

oh that’s so cool!!

hey quick question: is that also true of the store or will it be ...

2024-12-31T16:24:34Z

In reply to nevent1q…42k8
_________________________

hey quick question: is that also true of the store or will it be up longer?

I love you, you fucking dork

2024-12-29T03:23:07Z

In reply to nevent1q…d296
_________________________

I love you, you fucking dork

Okay so I think this story might help some people so I’m gonna ...

2024-12-28T14:56:21Z

Okay so I think this story might help some people so I’m gonna share it here.

So when I was trying to decide if I was going to take HRT, my big fear was that I would be ugly. And people kept telling me “no, no, you’ll be beautiful” but it always felt so fake to my traumatized brain.

And then I said it to the right person. And this guy, he looked me dead in the eyes and said with absolute sincerity “My dude, you’re already ugly. At least you’d be a woman.”

I scheduled the HRT appointment the next day, and was on estrogen 2 weeks later.

Sure, I get now that I always was a woman and that being attractive isn’t the point of transition or the point of womanhood. But that’s not what I was trying to say with “what if I’m ugly?” What I realize now is that what I was trying to say was “what if things just get worse?”

And that friend, in an admittedly brutal way, heard what I was really asking and said “They’ll get better in at least one way.”

And they did get better.

And I am happier.

And that’s what matters.

Tired: “You’re not a switch, you’re a sub who will do ...

2024-12-23T13:38:43Z

Tired: “You’re not a switch, you’re a sub who will do anything to please your partner.”

Wired: “You’re not a switch, you’re a dom who sometimes wants to be held and told everything is going to be okay.”

Inspired: “You’re not a switch, you’re a Switch 2 (releases 2025)”

Don't call me a whore, call me a: ...

2024-12-06T18:34:16Z

Don't call me a whore, call me a:

It snowed today, and I’m crying I don’t know why I’m ...

2024-11-30T16:17:14Z

It snowed today, and I’m crying
I don’t know why I’m crying. Not exactly.
It’s snowing today. Just a little flurry.
Barely enough to cover the leaves.

They still peek up
Through the snow.
And I’m crying.

It doesn’t snow much here anymore.
Not the way it did when I was a child.
But it did today.

And I think it’s giving me hope.

Because it used to snow here
All the time
And it got harder
And harder
For it to snow here.

But it did today.

I used to be able to do all the things
All the time
And it got harder
And harder
For me to manage it all.

But I will today.

Because if snow can fall on land
That forgot the caress of flakes
Then I can get out of bed
And I can move ahead.

It snowed today and I’m crying
Because i believed
It was no longer possible

So if it can snow here still
What other impossible things
Am I still capable of doing?

I guess the only way to know
Is to try.

swoons Wife me already!

2024-11-28T00:58:46Z

In reply to nevent1q…u9v4
_________________________

*swoons* Wife me already!

“Hey babe want to hear a mashup of American Idiot and the ...

2024-11-28T00:56:32Z

In reply to nevent1q…dcl4
_________________________

“Hey babe want to hear a mashup of American Idiot and the SpongeBob theme?”

“Yes. Every day. For the rest of my life.”

For date night she played me cursed song mashups and meme tracks. ...

2024-11-28T00:55:36Z

For date night she played me cursed song mashups and meme tracks.

I’m gonna marry this woman one day.

#gfposting

good fucking question goddamnit Microsoft.

2024-11-19T14:14:33Z

In reply to nevent1q…keak
_________________________

good fucking question goddamnit Microsoft.

Okay I know that for most of the world OTP means "One time ...

2024-10-20T16:13:02Z

Okay I know that for most of the world OTP means "One time Payment" but that is never how I read it so I see "We have received your OTP" and I read "We have Jean Grey X Emma Frost toxic Yuri."

Luna and I talking about old tech. Me: “Okay, blast from the ...

2024-10-19T14:03:55Z

*Luna and I talking about old tech.*
Me: “Okay, blast from the past - I used to have a Zune.”
Her: “Sweetie, I’ve seen pictures of you pre-transition, of course you had a Zune.”

OH! So this is what being read for filth feels like! Okay then!

LET IT BE KNOWN @npub1w7h…yh5n IS EEPY. (I have put it in the ...

2024-10-18T23:55:50Z

LET IT BE KNOWN

__ct__4LunaFv (npub1w7h…yh5n)

IS EEPY.

(I have put it in the papers)

There is no greater bit than describing things that are not the ...

2024-10-16T13:36:04Z

There is no greater bit than describing things that are not the product of evolution as if they evolved.

Especially because half the time it reveals like, actual information about how the thing formed.

"Rugby and American Football share a common ancestor. However, the key taxonomic difference between the two is the adaptation of the forward pass, which evolved in America due to a lack of competition for the forward moving ball at high speeds niche. In England, that forward moving ball at high speeds niche was occupied by traditional Football, which is why early nomenclature conflated the two."

pretty omg

2024-10-14T20:03:01Z

In reply to nevent1q…n37a
_________________________

pretty omg

Keeping in mind that dictation to text is, for me, an ...

2024-10-09T13:29:31Z

Keeping in mind that dictation to text is, for me, an accessibility tool - it is *incredibly* frustrating to have it autocorrect "north" to "N" or similar forced abbreviations. Like...this is the opposite of helpful, if I wanted it to say N I'd fucking say the letter N.

That's not how that works and you know it!

2024-10-07T12:25:03Z

In reply to nevent1q…qwqe
_________________________

That's not how that works and you know it!

I thought I couldn't love her more than I do. Then I saw how ...

2024-10-06T16:44:22Z

I thought I couldn't love her more than I do.
Then I saw how beautiful she is
When she smiles for another
While we smile together
And I realize her heart is bigger
Than even I can fill.

(I have so many happy polyamory feels right now)