Nostr notes by Steffie 🏳️‍⚧️ :rubber_pride-heart-600: :triple-moon-transfem:

I've been thinking a lot about "space" as a trans fem ...

2026-04-30T22:58:44Z

I've been thinking a lot about "space" as a trans fem recently. The space I occupy; the ways in which I and other tans fems are suppose to occupy space; the limitations of transition and material space; and politically, how fems, in general, are asked to both constrain and police space. It's both a deeply personal and yet visibly public area that impacts us all, to some degree or another.

One of my earliest (and continuing) senses of dysphoria focuses around the space my body occupies. I am tall, I am broad shouldered. As my body developed into this form I became more and more disassociated from it. I would avoid smaller public gatherings, and try to disappear within the crowd - always feeling too visible, too big, within the space. This doesn't seem to be an uncommon experience among trans fems, as the amount freedom and visibility we display in non-material (virtual) spaces compared to the material world differs dramatically.

It should go without saying, that cultural and political systems have framed *Ideal Womanhood* or *Ideal femininity* as both passive and retreating. Women - and fems, as their related cousins - were (and still are) expected to exert a 'quiet presence' and influence: to remain objects for consumption rather than public actors. The structures of modern society has been built around this desire to limit and control fem bodies in public spaces (eg. the only reason we have gender segregated bathrooms was the desire limit women's ability to occupy taverns, office buildings, courtrooms, et. al.) Trends in fashion and modesty have promoted reduction in mobility and freedom: including outrageous campaigns to dissuade women from horseback riding or bicycling (see [bicycle face](https://historydetectivepodcast.com/bicycle-face/), as well as the normalization of restrictive fashions (eg. I, too, love a pair of nice stiletto heels, but - come on girls - these were never meant to allow us to be freer or more mobile). Thus, we have a system which is designed to equate womanhood or femininity with a smaller or more restrictive public presence than that allowed for men.

For trans fems this can become a difficult challenge: asserting our rights while remaining *small*. Being accepted or perceived in feminine terms while our material bodies frequently do not align with the space or fashion we occupy. It comes as no surprise, therefore, that our size, volume, or presence in public spaces is the center of so much transphobic rhetoric and hatred. These attacks try to deny or undermine our womanhood or feminity by distancing us from [*Ideal Womanhood*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ideal_womanhood), while never acknowledging the restrictive and patriarchal nature of this construct (terfs are notoriously prone to this style of argument). Yet, this is the intersection of liberation that both cis and trans women seek. It is the nexus of feminist and transfeminist right to exist in public spaces without restrictions and fear of violence. To be free and equal among others. While trans fems have much to learn from the history of cis feminism *(both good and bad)*, cis feminists have a great deal to learn from their trans sisters about living and traversing public spaces as fems. It is this critical we continue to challenge both patriarchal systems and feminism in general. As the expansion of the latter will only continue to diminish the latter. As has been said many times before, the oppression of some (or one) is the oppression of all.

Our existence apparently now needs a warning label now FCC Chair ...

2026-04-22T21:01:06Z

Our existence apparently now needs a warning label now

FCC Chair Seeks Public Comments On Proposal For Warning Labels On Shows With Transgender People

https://www.politico.com/news/2026/04/22/brendan-carr-tv-gender-identity-fcc-00887017

just adorable. I always wanted to get some puppies and do a fox ...

2026-04-13T19:06:04Z

In reply to nevent1q…rxf9
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just adorable. I always wanted to get some puppies and do a fox hunt scene

what a cute puppy - looks like they're ready for walkies

2026-04-07T18:39:44Z

In reply to nevent1q…ehgw
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what a cute puppy - looks like they're ready for walkies

Nostr event nevent1qqsxgafeucmwees9j4kpazaz54v4jrxt7vvnfaqqv0uxmzm3q93r7pszyrklmy7npk3lpnnmy3zr92d3yffad29h4u2wka0dm45w2tmekwyn62tj7ll

2026-04-05T17:28:08Z

is it e-*Stim* or is it *E*-stim?

The entire backbone of the Fediverse runs on Linux and cats, or ...

2026-03-24T14:59:31Z

In reply to nevent1q…zll6
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The entire backbone of the Fediverse runs on Linux and cats, or didn't you know this?

I always wash mine with a little soap and some Vivashine and hang ...

2026-03-09T20:07:57Z

In reply to nevent1q…4gwt
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I always wash mine with a little soap and some Vivashine and hang dry, and then store in ziplock bags in a dark place. After many years, most my pieces remain in great shape.

There's not belief in _AGP_ or commitment or a "erotic ...

2026-03-04T00:19:38Z

In reply to nevent1q…xgug
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There's not belief in _AGP_ or commitment or a "erotic target relocation" to the gynocentric self. Rather, it's a strange body/soul essentialism.

If that were true, it would at least be hilarious. Instead ...

2026-03-04T00:14:01Z

In reply to nevent1q…l7w3
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If that were true, it would at least be hilarious. Instead it's conversion therapy via transition.

I feel like technically is doing a lot of lift here.

2026-03-04T00:04:38Z

In reply to nevent1q…ly0c
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I feel like *technically* is doing a lot of lift here.

Again, that's a very Hobbesian view. The argument that ...

2026-02-12T20:09:10Z

In reply to nevent1q…lcdx
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Again, that's a very Hobbesian view. The argument that "might creates order" is not only imperialist, but leads to the conditions which you seem to object to. Additionally, this has not been the case across all human history. In certain places, "Grog's 20 enforcers" have been met by 60 who ban together - even if temporally - for protection and mutual defense. There are numerous ways states have been conceived of across time, and we do ourselves a disservice.

I feel like that's a bit of an over-simplification. The ...

2026-02-12T04:44:16Z

In reply to nevent1q…7pd5
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I feel like that's a bit of an over-simplification. The Vikings had laws. The Iroquois confederation had laws. Laws arise when the need for an organized state arises. Without a state, you're arguing we descend into Hobbesian anarchy where life is brutish and ruled by strength. There are, of course, other theories of the state: where the state arises out of mutual need and a desire to broaden society for aid, protection, procreation, etc. Thus laws initially arise as a way for the state to scale communal order. Certainly, we can look at the modern state (with it's bureaucracy, technocrats, and corruption) and forget the original purpose of need for the rule of law.

Not necessarily, equal individuals or families would start wars ...

2026-02-11T15:07:02Z

In reply to nevent1q…ll56
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Not necessarily, equal individuals or families would start wars of vengeance against one another, historically, because one family member stole from or cause the death of another family's member. Laws are an attempt to create a civil society where the community becomes the injured party. Certainly, we can view the manipulation or creation of laws today within the modern framework of industrial capital, but the original intent was to help maintain a broader community or civil order.

My recollection is, we developed laws to socialize and control ...

2026-02-11T03:32:51Z

In reply to nevent1q…en7s
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My recollection is, we developed laws to socialize and control private grievances and acts of vengeance.